Thread by @garius

Not done a naval thread in a while so...

~~ wobbly lines ~~

1804. Straights of Malacca.

Commodore Nathanial Dance, leading the China Convoy, is about to defeat a French battle squadron using only a brig, his merchants, some paint and the most overplayed hand in naval history.

So, to understand how this happens, you first have to understand the situation in 1804.

Britain and France are at war again (shocker), but this time it is going global. Because Napoleon is a very smart cookie.

Knowing Britain is super-reliant on its overseas trade, he sends out naval squadrons across the world BEFORE the war breaks out, ready to disrupt that.

Most critically, to intercept the China Convoy. 800 MILLION POUNDS (modern value) of trade, in one fleet, due to depart soon.

This catches the Royal Navy out, who have precisely zero ships in the area when Contre-Admiral Charles-Alexandre Linois, with a Ship of the Line and a lot of sexy frigates, starts causing havoc in East Asia.

It also leaves the China Convoy with a problem: sail or don't sail?

Now the convoy isn't defenceless. It includes 11 East Indiamen. Armed merchants with up to 36 guns. But they're not designed for war, just scaring pirates.

The captains don't want to sail. Corporate HQ back in London interjects:

You WILL sail. Don't worry! We found you a brig!!

Command falls to Nathaniel Dance. So armed only with the naval equivalent of a technical, he preps to sail.

Dance knows FULL WELL Linois will find him though, because:

1) Sod's law
2) Spies

So he starts planning for that. This includes buying a LOT of paint.

(Remember this)

~~ wobbly lines. Few days later ~~

We're now on board the 64 gun Ship of the Line Marengo. Adm Linois is greedily looking through le telescope at the China Convoy. Because:

1) Sod's law
2) Spies

He moves to attack then pauses.

He looks again.

Are those... Ships of the Line?

On the deck of the East Indiaman Earl Camden, is watching the French praying that his plan will work.

Because Dance is a wily old sea dog. He knows what East Indiamen look like from a distance.

Ships of the Line.

Particularly, ya know, if you PAINT THEM IN ROYAL NAVY COLOURS

On the Marengo, Linois is thinking. The Royal Navy shouldn't be here. There's no WAY they can have got here in time. Right? Right?!

He thinks, then decides. His eyes must be playing tricks on him. He goes to order the attack again and...

...pauses.

Wait! What? Is that...

The Earl Camden. the same time. Dance can see the French preparing to attack. They're not biting.

Dance orders his East Indiamen to do the thing he's been drilling them rigorously to do since sailing.

The signal goes out!

"FORM LINE!"

On the Marengo, Linois cancels the attack again. He decides to wait and shadow the convoy. He's not stupid. They CAN'T be Ships of the Line, surely?

He mulls it overnight. At dawn he decides.

Raise the battle standards! We attack the...

wait, WHAT NOW?!

On the Earl Camden, Dance realises this is it. He can run, disperse and he and a lot of the Indiamen will get away. But not the slower merchants. So...

ACTIVATE STAGE THREE

His Indiamen raise blue, ROYAL NAVY standards.

Form Line of Battle again.

And they charge the French.

On the Marengo, a state of confusion now exists. Linois KNOWS the Navy can't be here. These MUST be merchants.

But the ship colours...

And Royal Navy standards...

And... they're ATTACKING?!

He waivers, but orders his squadron to engage. The two sides fire on each other.

ACTIVATE STAGE FOUR

This is it. Dance's final gamble. During the night he drafted every spare crewman off the other ships.

He's told them: We've PRACTICED this. Be Ships of the Line for an hour. Give me EVERYTHING for an hour. If you give me an hour, then the French will BREAK.

The East Indiamen and fighty little brig HMS Ganges, in perfect line of battle, their boosted crews firing and sailing as good as any Royal Navy vessel, engage the French Battle Squadron. Pretending to shrug off the shots tearing through them.

45 mins later. The French break.

In what becomes known as the Battle of Pulo Aura, Commodore Nathanial Dance defeats and scatters Admiral Linois' French battle squadron, saving the China Convoy, with a brig and 11 East Indiamen.

In his report to Napoleon, Linois claims that Dance had EIGHT Ships of the Line.

SO WHAT HAPPENS NEXT?

Well, after 45 years at sea as a merchant captain, Dance suddenly finds himself able to retire. The Convoy's insurers are so grateful they grant him a pension for life, equivalent to £40k now. He's also knighted.

To his death though, he credits the bravery and resilience of the merchant crews more than himself.

"It has been my good fortune to have been enabled, by the firmness of those by whom I was supported, to perform my trust."

Linois, meanwhile, reported the failure to take the China Convoy to Napoleon. Once the truth of the force disparity came out, he defended his actions. He had been successful enough raiding elsewhere that this, combined with a dearth of alternatives, meant he retained his command.

In 1806, off the Canaries, Linois' squadron spots large sails on the horizon.

Determined not to be caught out again, Linois attacks...

...to the pleasant surprise of Admiral John Warren in HMS Foudroyant, commanding seven Ships of Line. He swiftly defeats and captures Linois.

Anyway, hope you've enjoyed this little bit of naval history, which I love because it's a brilliant example of how battles can be won by being smart with what you've got and by using your head.

And if you've enjoyed it, you can buy me a Friday beer here! ko-fi.com/garius