foone Profile picture
2 May, 37 tweets, 5 min read
microsoft: mousekeys lets you control the cursor using the keyboard. it's great for accessibility!
also microsoft: we're rewriting the windows 10 input stack for better security
users: wait now mousekeys doesn't work on some directx programs!
microsoft, putting their lips directly on the mic: let me say this from the bottom of my heart: I don't care and fuck you.
introducing windows 11! we've finally finished hardening input security. now games aren't allowed to use the keyboard or mouse.
buy an xbox 360 controller or don't play games. the choice is simple.
(in windows 12 they'll drop support for xbox 360 controllers, because it turned out some users were spoofing their inputs, and UI AUTOMATION IS THE LARGEST PROBLEM FACING MODERN COMPUTING)
when bill gates finishes taking over the world, if you write a program that clicks a button you will go to jail forever.
yeah I just spent 2 hours rewriting my usb-keyboard-emulator because it turns out my previous workaround for not having both USB-keyboard and USB-mouse emulation working at once doesn't work in some situations, because they can't detect mousekey clicks.
this is because the main goal of windows 10 input stack "improvements" is to make shit not work in the hopes that you'll fuck off to linux or macos or something and microsoft can finally rest
it still doesn't work with mame, though.

the oceans will dry up and the stars go dark and we still won't be able to plug in a keyboard and have it work in mame
which is why I have a keyboard emulator plugged into my system 24/7 because having dedicated hardware to lie about keyboards was the easiest way to fix that mame issue
I'm telling you now, it's only a matter of time before I own a fully mechanical keyboard emulator. It'll just be a bunch of solenoids or servo-motors which move and press keys on a keyboard.
because someday that will be the only way to automate keypresses
and 10 seconds later, some fucker will start working on making keyboards that work like yubikeys, where they only activate through capacitive touch, to prevent people using Fake Fingers.
I JUST WANT TO CLICK THE BUTTON AND TYPE THE LETTERS WHY IS THIS SO HARD ;_;
gonna design a keyboard where you have to solve a captcha for every keypress, because that's apparently where computers are headed
I press a key and my computer screen fades to grey. a big popup appears, reading "Verifying, please wait"
my phone rings. it's microsoft. the operator on the line wants me to confirm my social security number and my windows serial number before they can let this keypress happen
people like me, the outlaws of our glorious automation-free future, are only able to scrape by a living at the edges of society, hidden in the dark, illegally hiring people from the 3rd world to push keys on my computer for me
There's gonna be some elite crimefighting unit put together to stop KeyPirates like me. ButtonThieves. PressGangers. ClickBastards.
I'm looking forward to giving up on using electronics to automate computer programs and instead building elaborate rube goldberg machines to drop marbles onto my keyboard with the right position and timing
actually I probably should build a marble-based keyboard. that sounds like fun.
like, you'd have to put marbles in several slots, and based on when and where you put them, it types different things.
I better do this quick while it's still possible to inject keypresses into a computer over USB without a certificate signed by the Microsoft CEO, The US President, the head of the UN, and both popes.
it's often said, occasionally by me, that I hate computers.
This is actually incorrect! I love computers.
I only hate two specific parts of computers:
1. software
2. hardware
and firmware is on thin fucking ice.
now that I spent two hours rewriting my fake-keyboard to also be a fake-mouse, I'm too annoyed to actually go back to my project that needed it. I'm gonna have to relax by playing Marble Drop in a win98 VM
oh it's getting hard now
that took a while
BTW I'm using a VM here (because I'm too lazy to turn on my actual windows 98 machine I have next to me) but you can get this game running natively on windows 10 with a little work:
fdossena.com/?p=marble/inde…
it's one of those games in the weird situation where it can't install on 64bit windows 10 but it can run on it.
So you have to manually install it, then it'll work.
boy it sure would have been nice if Microsoft hadn't dropped support for 16bit windows programs, right?
arg, this is one of those text engines where the letters don't overlap, technically, but their shadows do.
So if you extract them as |a| you get the shadow of | affecting the shadows of the letter you want to copy.
gonna have to try extracting as "| a |" and hoping the space spacing isn't too Weird.
fun fact, 0x32 and 32 are completely different numbers and I am a forgetful fool
AND font
oh hey this thing has italics
it apparently uses "\x87Sf{digit}." to change fonts. italics is 2, normal is 0.

obviously this raises the question: what other fonts are there?
looks like the answer is "one more".
font 1 is a bolder version of the regular font.
here's the three fonts

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More from @Foone

3 May
tiny usb
This thing is an encryption dongle, for (apparently triple-DES), 128 bit.
You plug it into a Addonics Saturn Cipher disk drive tray, and it'll encrypt the drive at the hardware level.
Read 45 tweets
3 May
if I'm to have a symbol, it shall be one I respect.
So the way this works is it pairs up with this, which is the backside of a rotary knob:
and the idea is that every position of the knob activates a unique set of these pads, allowing the device to know what position the knob is in.
Read 11 tweets
2 May
now that's a new error.
This floppy drive "works" as in it seeks and all, but it is sending ZERO SIGNALS BACK. either that or the disk has been mass erased since last week
WARNING: THIS IS NOT A MAGNETIC DISK
IT IS INFACT A PERFECTLY SMOOTH PIECE OF ACRYLIC
I knew it was a mistake to try to read a CD-ROM in a 5.25" floppy drive
Read 40 tweets
2 May
I dreamed my roommate and I were hanging out on a stone bridge somewhere, she had a sword, and we were getting annoyed by all the parades of marching bands.

I woke up and though "well that's not realistic. She would definitely not use a rapier."
That's a dueling weapon. Heck, it was almost a foil, for fencing. That's a gentleman's game, with rules and regulations and tournaments!
She's an anarchist! She doesn't believe in all that.
No, clearly she'd go for something light, yes, but deadly serious.
Maybe a short sword, or even a machete. A katana or scimitar at most.
Read 11 tweets
2 May
Anybody need a tru-flector?
It's a high-intensity incandescent lamp. Amusingly it's built like it's a vacuum tube, not a bulb.
don't think too hard about what the difference is between an incandescent bulb and a vacuum tube.

because there kinda isn't one
Read 5 tweets
2 May
not to sound like a broken record on the whole THIS WAS WRITTEN IN UNITY? thing but wow.

I could (AND DID) write games like this in Visual Basic! WHY IS IT UNITY
I guess the answer is that Unity is the Visual Basic of 2021
I've been meaning to build a modernized update of Skifree, a game that's 87kb without compression, so I could do things like port it to run on DOS or linux natively.
But I think I'll give up on a low-level port and just remake it in unity for phones.
Read 5 tweets

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