Men are werewolves
As an escort, I'd have dinner with an intelligent, perceptive man - ceo or something - and I'd think, no way he's a werewolf. When we end up in bed, he'll remain himself, conscious, alert.
But no; they transformed every time into an unrecognizable sex creature.
It was really startling for me. I thought I'd get some kind of continuity between the man and the wolf. I thought at least some men wouldn't have wolves at all. I've had sex with a lot of women, and they don't become wolves! But the men became different, felt different.
It was as if their soul left their body, like the perception and intelligence vanished, and they went from a competent suited wallstreet king to a sweaty, slightly pink body hungrily groping you, eyes half lidded, breathing heavy "baby you like that?" directly in your ear.
It's insane. And don't get me wrong - I did enjoy some werewolves - but all of them transform, and the transformations are more startling in men who have to present as a nonsexual to the public. The ones that act as though they've never thought of sex - those are radical shifts.
Being an escort has given me the werewolf eye - every politician, philanthropist, celebrity looking sane and in control, they're just a few short steps away from tit-induced mania. Inside all of them is a flushed man hammering away at a vagina like an autistic kid building legos.
Comedian masturbates in front of coworker? Philanthropist pursues aid? Politician cheats on wife? These aren't abnormal, they are par for the course; little, slightly-more-visible blips in the giant undercurrent of men's repressed sexuality, only newsworthy cause we're in denial.
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Just searched my name on Twitter and basically 99% of the (high number) of mentions are viciously negative. It's so crazy that just being an openly weird slutty woman generates such universal hate, completely unaffected by high commitment to (trying to be) kind and truth seeking
the thing about this that makes me saddest isn't that people hate me, but the overwhelming hate with nobody defending me. People are ashamed publicly to support me, they don't want to be called a simp or cringe. I get it but it's a little pang that makes me feel alienated
I think I had some shock when I saw how positive the reception was to the decker photo. People just overwhelmingly called him based, chad, respect for him increased. I knew it would be better than the way people treated me but I don't think I expected the gap to be so huge
Thread of photos from families in each quartile of income in the world: first photo is from the poorest 25%, last photo is richest 25%.
Based on these photos, which income bracket are you in?
First up: Toilets
i've heard ppl who lost a lot of weight talk about some angry cynicism when people start treating them better, even ppl they've known for a long time.
I'm having a bit of that now that twitter seems to like me. i've been consistently myself this entire time, what's happening.
literally last weekend i had multiple ppl come up to me at a party and go 'oh are you aella? i see you on twitter cause everyone hates you'.
if the thing that causes ppl to like me is that i just publicly was patient and knowledgeable with a doofus then this feels kind of shallow and fickle and bad incentives for me. Like what, i win the tribal allegiance game by doing very easy, low-brow things? oh no
i feel like i got friendly with the anti-woke coalition over the past few years, but now it feels like they're walking off a plank into extremism and i feel frustrated about it. Being anti a bad thing doesn't make you right by default; righteous revenge is not compassion
i cant believe i went through years of being super trans-cancelled, shinigami eyes labeled a transphobe due to my sin of being nuanced, and now im feeling like im about to become an insane woke trans defender in the eyes of those who moved further right than me
maybe this is cliche af but my calibration method is something like "Imagine you were really, deeply in love with someone, but also had good boundaries around not overexerting yourself, betraying yourself, or lying. From love, what would you say, how would you act?"
as someone who's eaten a buttload of lsd, tripsat another buttload of people on lsd, and seen plenty of examples of ppl kinda losing it after lsd, here's my advice to not go insane: 1. LSD can be lifechangingly good. You shouldn't make the decision to avoid it lightly/
2. I would be hyper careful if you have bipolar, schizophrenia, any psychosis in your family. I'd be careful if you're trans, have anxiety, are switching any meds, or if you've exhibited unusually high amounts of altered beliefs on other drugs.
3. I would START WITH SMALL DOSES. Seriously. Start tiny. Slowly work your way up. This can give you the opportunity to notice at very low levels any symptoms that are a clue you should not continue.
Those symptoms are:
The more I've learned about kinks, the more I realize I have no idea what's going on, and neither does anyone else. If someone makes a bold, blanket claim about kinks, they don't know what's going on.
Probably some kinks are the result of trauma, sometimes. But it depends! 1/
Certain fetishes seem correlated with childhood abuse more than others, and in certain demographics more than others. And even among the fetishes that are correlated more, there's still a substantial fraction of people who are into weird stuff and report zero childhood abuse.
Not all kinks are created equal - there's different categories of fetishes, and my theory (looking at all the data i have) is that they likely have different types of causes, and use different types of the brain than others, and play vastly different functions