foone Profile picture
8 Jun, 54 tweets, 9 min read
OK so there are clocks that rotate counterclockwise, right?
imagine you put one of those in a regular clock face, but let it rotate backwards as normal.

How many times a day will it show the correct time?
my first guess is four.
although actually I guess 6:30 and 12:30 aren't going to be exact, because the hour hand won't be in the right place.

so maybe the answer is just two
except of course those times take place twice a day, because our clocks are silly.

I'm disappointed that I can't get a 24hour counterclockwise clock
do I have to do everything myself
this isn't what I meant but it's interesting that it exists.…
I tried to adjust the SVG but I only got this far
whoa! it turns out there is a counterclockwise 24-hour clock, and it's from 1443!
It's in the Cattedrale di Santa Maria del Fiore, in Florence.
fun fact: this clock is 24 hours but it doesn't match up with the normal 24 hours.
It's in hora italica, which counts down to sunset. So the hour after sunset is always 1, the hour before is 23.
anyway if we're gonna talk about counterclockwise clocks you gotta stick up this quote from Rear Admiral Grace Hopper, who invented the compiler, COBOL, and codified the term "bug" (because she found a literal moth inside the Mark II computer)
she's also possibly the only computer programmer to have a guided missile destroyer named after her.
but they're planning to name one after the "the internet is a series of tubes" guy, so that's not exactly the most prestigious honor anymore
So, McCains. There's two ships that have been named the USS John S. McCain, right?
The first one was the USS John S. McCain (DL-3), laid down in 1949.
This was named after, well, John S. McCain, born 1884. He was a US Navy Admiral, and had recently died, so he got a boat named after him.
And the original John S. McCain (DL-3) was decommissioned in 1978.
and then in 1988, the US navy ordered another one, laid down in 1991. This was (and is) the USS John S. McCain (DDG-56).

But who is it named after? And who was it named after?
So it turns out this one was named after John S. McCain (1884-1945) AGAIN, but he's not the only one.
It was also named after John S. McCain (1911-1981), who was ALSO a US Navy Admiral!
and that's who it was named after.

It's not who it is named after.
because in 2018, the US navy had a rededication ceremony, and now it's also named after... John S. McCain!
But that's John S. McCain (1936-2018)
So the first boat was named after the Grandfather of Last McCain, the second boat was named after the Grandfather and Father, but was later renamed to the same name, but it's now named for all three McCains
There is a John McCain IV, who was a navy helicopter pilot.
He apparently goes by Jack, though.
Here he is (right)
He doesn't yet have a boat named after him.
But the USS John S. McCain (DDG-56) is still in service, so maybe he'll get one eventually.
BTW, the older two McCains who had boats named after them were dead before the boat was named that

The 3rd McCain died in 2018, but that was in August, and the boat was renamed in July.
anyway if the Navy ever decommissions the USS John S. McCain (DDG-56), I hope for the new one they name it after the second McCain, third McCain, and forth McCain.
This'll get the McCains back on equal footing. Right now the oldest one has TWO boats, which is unfair
except for the youngest John S. McCain, who would only have one. But he'll be first in line for the next boat, I'm sure.
also random fact about John S. McCain IV, the youngest one (he who has no boats)
if you google him the first result says he's dead, but he died in 2068? this is because it's from a fandom wiki.
this article includes a picture where he's been photoshopped to look older, and... more like this.
every day that passes I will photoshop his face 1% smaller until my demands are met
my demands are:
1. a counterclockwise 24 hour clock
2. a guided missile destroyer to be named after me
@justarandomgeek had the great terrible idea of an analog clock where the hour and minute hands rotate in different directions.
I love it. I want one.
it'd also be amusing to design a clock where the hours are marked and so are the minutes, but they're on concentric motorized circles. So they rotate, and the hour/minute hands don't.
bonus bad idea:
both the hands and the dials rotate, but at different speeds, so that they work out to be the right time
now that I'm thinking up ideas for Bad Clocks, I feel I should tie this back into my other Bad Design love, Bad Keyboards.

now I just need to build a Bad KeyboardClock
although I wonder if anyone has made a clock out of a keyboard? like just take an analog clock face and put keycaps for the digits
anyway the obvious way to make a clockkeyboard would be to have it only have one button, which types a letter based on the current time
here's how I think it should work:
lowercase is 0-25, then we stuff in 4 punctuation (space, period, exclamation point, single quote), then uppercase is 30-55, then 56-59 are more punctuation: comma, double quote, question mark, backspace.
assuming no errors, you can type "hello world" in 10 hours.
you'd think it'd be 11 because there's 11 characters, but you can just push the button twice during the L-minute of "hello"
try to understand THAT fucking tweet out of context, I dare you
I located a teensy. I don't know what variety it is, it doesn't seem to say on it. all I know is that it blinks
oh good, it's a teensy 3.5
this one has an RTC in it, which is important because then it'll be able to keep time
I wrote a diagram so I can figure out how to type with this thing.
It seems to work though. Unfortunately I've been awake since 10:30 pm so the chances of me being away for another 10 hours are very low. I'll have to show it working tomorrow.
I'll give you a tease though: it's 3:50, so what letter do I get?
That's right, U! Today is brought to you by the letter U!
btw it turns out "10 hours" is way overkill. You can actually type it faster, because you are continually making passes through the alphabet A-Z and you can just type letters as they go past.
As pointed out by several people, like here:
I'm not away enough to think about things. I'll have to confirm this works with the realities of my keyboard and plan out my 5-hour-typing-session in the morning.
maybe I should stick a little display on the keyboard so you know what letter you're typing.
the computer and keyboard can be out of sync by a second or two, and you don't want to type the wrong key and lose an hour waiting for backspace to come around

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Which I do support, so...
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Swype... Do you think the rickroll is like a California roll or a dinner roll?
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