Please consider #WordOfHonor AU where Zhou Zishu runs into Bureau of the Unfaithful pre-canon and accidentally teams up with them out of "fuckit, may as well" energy.
just bear with me: ZZS intervenes in a guy being a Huge Fucking Asshole (bc he's interfering w/his drinking)
Beauty Ghost was on her way to pick up HFAssole bc he was on her list of dudes to collect for the next funeral marriage and ZZS clocks her as using disguise techniques from 4seasons manor and is like "unfortunately, my only weakness: a mystery about my old sect"
There's a brief verbal non-confrontation bc these two are currently in disguise master mode, which results in ZZS tailing Beauty Ghost back to the Luo manor and just...aggressively spying bc again, this dude has not met a mystery he could actually just leave be
Shenanigans happen, ZZS and Tragicomic Ghost wind up w/ a mutual "Fighting with you would be mutually destructive, i trust you zero percent, but also i respect the heck out of you and you don't seem to have bad intentions, wanna drink and hang out" mutual defense pact
Once Again someone thinks they're doing a great job of keeping secrets from ZZS (still in full beggar disguise), who has in fact figured quite a lot of their shit out in 10 minutes and simply did choose to share that info or react to it in any way
Definitely somewhere in there a convo of like "so, betrayed any lovers" & ZZS returns w/ "never had any", "okay well, betrayed anything you loved" and ZZS, w/o emotion "i kept every promise i made, and in doing so betrayed the only people who mattered to me [thousand yard stare"
ZZS leaves his carefully built spynetwork/assassination network and immediately falls in with.....a spynetwork and plots. This Might As Well Happen, he's dead in three years anyways, might as well watch the show and they seem nice enough, probably gonna get merits helping them
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Accidental Batman ZZS is such a funny concept to play with. He's not trying to be anything, he just has insomnia, a fondness for long walks at night, & an unholy mix of curiousity, combat training, and a death wish
1) ZZS is recently 'forcibly retired' from his job which did extra-legal services for a combined like, medical research + hospital that funded its early years & charity services through well, ZZS's team. Now that it's got a steady income, it cleaned up it's image & income stream
2) 'forcible retirement' includes a massive payout, hella NDA and a giant resume gap and a sudden void of things to do or goals for ZZS. He's tired all day and doesn't sleep at night. He's Fine!!
animal transformation fic in #WordOfHonor would be hilarious in every variation. in order to leave window of heaven you have to be transformed into an animal? wen kexing randomly transforms into a tiny kitten uncontrollably? chengling is transformed into a songbird!
Zhou Zishu leaves window of heaven and the magic takes hold as it does for every operative - animals tell no tales. But he invented it and keeps his human mind and ability to speak and sets out to wander the world, truly free of human concerns, exploring feline wine tolerance
Chengling, his suspiciously fluffy "pet" cat who laps wine out of dishes instead of water and absolutely definitely doesn't talk no matter what wen kexing thinks, and absolute hijinks throughout jianghu
thinking about wtf Wen Chao thought he was doing with the indoctrination bureau because he was clearly making zero effort to keep anyone alive and: imagine an AU where no one made it out of Xuanwu cave like - what would all of the sects DONE!?
Like - Nie Huaisang wasn't on the hunt in CQL so he goes back home and NO ONE ELSE DOES because they're 'dead'. Wen Chao is all "wow so tragic how this powerful beast took out all the indoctrination disciples and sect heirs and only I was able to slay it after a long battle!!
I, for one, can't see anyone at Lotus Pier being like 🤷♀️ welp, nothing we can do here!
And while who knows what JGS might do on the cowardice/pride scale, I feel like Madame Jin might have Quite Some Things To Say About That
just reminded myself of idea of "wen ning, secret and accidental romance novel writer of the burial mounds" from a while back and started laughing again
Wen Ning, who doesn't sleep and has a very active fantasy life for all the people around him with Doomed Romances going on that he imagines various other worlds and scenarios where everyone could end up happy to combat the gloom and encroaching howling of the resentful energy
Wen Ning accidentally writing down RPF-with-the-serial-numbers-filed off on the backs of Wei Wuxians failed talisman drafts which frequently feature an grasping and corrupted sect dressed in gold and quite a few tender scenes where a sweet younger brother watches his sister marry