OG JJ Profile picture
20 Jul, 14 tweets, 3 min read
Instead of wasting even more energy explaining why this out-of-touch former lawyer was wildly off the mark in her advice to young women - let's have a thread of helpful career advice to working mom lawyers (and who knows if we have to limit it to lawyers, tbh). I'll start below.
The best advice, which isn't always feasible, is to work somewhere that values lawyers with families and some semblance of work/life balance.

Inherent in being a lawyer is that your life will be unbalanced at times. There are seasons where your job will take some priority.
But they should only be *seasons* and not permanent. Work somewhere that recognizes that. Talk is cheap - money talks. Work somewhere that is willing to reward achievement with more money.
Have mentors, but have champions and sponsors. Cultivate relationships where people will spend political capital on your behalf. That might mean you have to do it in return, so be willing to stand up for people.
One way to cultivate those relationships is to look out for other people. Be sensitive to politics and give people a head's up on things before they're blindsided (to the extent you can).
I've twice had to lead our HR department in between CHRO hirings, and both during some very turbulent corporate times. It requires admitting that I need to rely on my team to execute things, and to invest in them so they know their work is appreciated.
If you are working in an all-boys-club, to an extent you may have to play the game. Be among them, but not of them. And when you gain credibility and power, that's when you can force changes. Play the long game for yourself and for those who come after you.
As lawyers, we are naturally Type-A and driven individuals. You will feel like you're failing everything, a lot of the time.

You aren't. And you're showing your kids that it's possible to be a badass and a mom at the same time.
As a parent, you will have emergencies. LIFE consists of emergencies and find a way to work with people who understand that. Knowing I can tell my boss, "My son broke his femur; I'll be pretty scarce for a few days while we sort this out," just means one less source of stress.
I'm honest about when my commitments are related to my kids. I don't hide them. I work with amazing female executives in the C-suite who are moms and not only do they understand, they've been confidants, mentors, and supporters.
I purposely haven't said anything about having a partner until now, because I know that isn't the case for everyone. BUT - for many people, it's better to have no partner than one who requires just as much work and emotional labor as your kids.
Having a true supportive partner in this is invaluable, but it absolutely can be done without one.
My last piece of advice, which seems antithetical to this thread I know, is to not take advice from more experienced lawyers as gospel. There are SO many variables at play that works for one person may not for another.
Take advice from people whose careers you admire or want to emulate. Discount advice from those whose lives or careers don't appeal to you. Advice is only worth the quality of the person giving it.

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More from @J_Dot_J

20 Jul
I'm killing time in this meeting looking at Great Pyrenees mixes available to rescue and I cannot be responsible for what happens next
Or this fluffy puppy
Read 4 tweets
19 Jul
Remember that lamentable column from the ABA Journal about how working moms are selfish and aren't team players? The author is back and she has *more* thoughts about it.

I'm sure she'll take our criticism under advis.....oh. Well then.
First, some well-placed guilt about how the ABA didn't stand behind her retrograde thoughts.
A poll for the ladies: Were you offended by that column because she "reminded" us about the difficult work like balance in law firms? Or were you offended because she bought into the stereotypes wholesale & hasn't worked in the professional capacity as a lawyer in almost 20 yrs?
Read 13 tweets
12 Jul
Morning calls are over and now I'm watching the second half of the Kraken sanctions hearing.

Strap in, boys.
Follow @RMFifthCircuit for the substantive live-tweet.

I'm too busy giggling at the visual of Julia Haller half-heartedly raising her hand to speak while Fink is raking them over the coals.
Haller has serious ShakeVoice.

Her argument that it's okay to submit affidavits they didn't write from witnesses they didn't talk to is....something. Something wrong.
Read 50 tweets
10 Jul
Don’t the best of them bleed it out;
While the rest of them peter out
Took me YEARS to figure out what he was saying there
Found a very old playlist of songs I loved in high school. A journey!

Forever and ever, amen.
Read 6 tweets
3 Jul
Watching The Tomorrow War and 20 minutes in, the writers have already put about 500% more thought into the “science” of it than Godzilla vs Kong.
Me: “This is already better than Godzilla v Kong.”

Husband: “Whoa whoa whoa. They haven’t flipped gravity in the center of the earth yet.”
This movie is basically a video game. I laughed out loud at “We’ve got spikes onsite. Watch your six.”
Read 4 tweets
2 Jul
Join me, won't you, in the rage stroke I had while reading this. Image
Nothing--but NOTHING--can derail a legal career quicker than children. Definitely not substance abuse issues. Definitely not unethical behavior. Children. Image
It's a medical fact that once women have children, they can no longer plan. They can't see long-term strategy. Our puny mommy brains just shrivel up and only focus on the immediate moment. Image
Read 16 tweets

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