Akiva Cohen Profile picture
Aug 5, 2021 18 tweets 6 min read Read on X
The decision in the Laura Loomer fee application is out. She got tagged for 123K. Let's take a look
Reminder of how we got here. Twitter banned Loomer (because she's incredibly awful and an Islamophobe). Loomer, as one does, sued CAIR, alleging that they conspired with Twitter to have her banned.
Florida law lets parties make an "offer of judgment" - basically, "I'll stipulate to a judgment in the amount of [insert dollars] if you will" - and says "if the other party denies it, and you do better than that as an end result, they have to pay your fees"
CAIR took advantage of that law and made Loomer what I assume was an extreme lowball offer ($1? $.01?) that she rejected. Then she went and lost a motion to dismiss, meaning she didn't beat the offer. So they asked for their attorneys fees
Loomer opposed, arguing that the statute didn't apply, because she was also seeking equitable relief and the offer of judgment would have required her to dismiss those claims. (i.e. it wasn't just money). And that brings us to this decision
This is also the case in which Ron Coleman (representing Loomer) somehow wasn't receiving notice of the filings, and got his heads up that Loomer had blown the original opposition date from LawTwitter pointing it out to him.
The court then runs through the basics of the Florida offer of judgment statute and its requirements, and notes that the CAIR offer met them (which Loomer didn't challenge).
The court decides to walk through the details of how it met those elements anyway, but, um ...
So now the analysis. The highlighted part looks bad for CAIR (spoiler, it wasn't) and like bad policy. If so, every plaintiff in FL should be including meritless claims for injunctive relief just to avoid an offer of judgment. That can't be right! (or, really, complete)
And it isn't. Basically, Florida seems to have a doctrine that prevents such pretextual claims for equitable relief; if what you're really after is money, just adding an equitable claim doesn't get you out of the offer of judgment statute.
This seems like a recipe for confusion (he says, without bothering to do even basic research into what this means in practice, because we're about to get a tutorial). Let's see how it plays out!
So ... yeah. Every claim against CAIR alleged pecuniary harm and sought damages. The prayer for relief sought damages, reformation of Twitter's TOS <gigglesnortguffaw>, and an injunction against doing it again. I can see where this is going already.
CAIR can't reform Twitter's TOS (so that equitable claim isn't against them), and there's no future conduct to enjoin (she's already banned, they can't get her banned again). So what's the equitable claim against them?
I'll be honest, the "you never asked for a TRO" thing doesn't bug me, because CAIR wasn't doing anything while the case was ongoing.

Except, I guess, she never moved for a TRO against Twitter requiring that they let her back on? How could they not have?
Yeah, that'll do it; you can't seriously be seeking injunctive relief without Twitter
And that's that. The rest of this is just pulling out the calculators and figuring out Loomer's tab
Which is ... not cheap.

Frivolous litigation should always include checkbooks at the ready, kids.

/fin
Coda: I've been informed that the offer was $0.25 per plaintiff (i.e. $.50 total) from each of the two CAIR defendants.

They offered her $1. She should have taken it and RUN.

• • •

Missing some Tweet in this thread? You can try to force a refresh
 

Keep Current with Akiva Cohen

Akiva Cohen Profile picture

Stay in touch and get notified when new unrolls are available from this author!

Read all threads

This Thread may be Removed Anytime!

PDF

Twitter may remove this content at anytime! Save it as PDF for later use!

Try unrolling a thread yourself!

how to unroll video
  1. Follow @ThreadReaderApp to mention us!

  2. From a Twitter thread mention us with a keyword "unroll"
@threadreaderapp unroll

Practice here first or read more on our help page!

More from @AkivaMCohen

Jun 30, 2023
OK, time to get myself ratioed.

The SCOTUS affirmative action decision was legally wrong - poorly reasoned and legally silly. But in the long run, and if it spurs schools to use socioeconomic status and opportunity as the finger on the scales, it will be a net positive
Race is a blunt instrument, and I think we *all* agree that, for example, Willow Smith doesn't need or warrant any sort of bump on her college application. But Willow Smith is a WILD outlier and "but what about [insert rare exception]" isn't a useful policy framework
So yeah, it was perfectly reasonable for universities to use that blunt instrument.

As many of these university reaction statements are making clear, the burden will now be to find finer instruments that allow for the same intended benefit of taking into account the very real
Read 7 tweets
Jun 9, 2023
This thread from Yesh is a good example of a philosophical mistake I like to call "solutionism" - the belief that if a problem is bad enough then there must be a solution out there to resolve it, because "yeah, it sucks, it can't be solved for" is too unthinkable to bear
You see it a lot in the context of Israel/Palestine, with people convinced that the right mixture of fairy dust & button pushing can lead to a peaceful resolution that addresses all of the important and competing imperatives, it's just that nobody has found the right mixture yet
And we're seeing it with "a large portion of the population is willing to believe any prosecution of crimes by Trump is political"

Yes, that sucks. Yes, that's a potentially society-destroying problem.

No, there isn't a solution
Read 8 tweets
Jun 9, 2023
@yesh222 You don't worry about that, because it's not a solveable problem. You keep doing the right thing and hope that convictions and mounting evidence prevents more people from joining the conspiracy theorists, but that's all you can do
@yesh222 I said this 4 years ago, and it's proven true in every particular.

Read 4 tweets
May 19, 2023
That she was the one stealing the bike.

Literally nothing she did on the video is consistent with her new story. When her colleague came over and the kids said "that's his bike, he already paid for it" she didn't deny it, or look surprised by the claim.
Like ... how do you determine truth in a they-said-she-said situation? Watch human behavior. Throughout the video, the kids' tone is exactly what you'd expect for someone who believes their own story. Hers very much is not
And when her colleague comes and suggests that the kids get another bike, and they say "no, he paid for that bike, he unlocked it, it's his" there's exactly no reaction of "no, *I* paid for it" or "what the hell", which is what you'd expect if they were lying
Read 4 tweets
May 9, 2023
Hey, Twitter, and especially my #LitigationDisasterTourists, gather round. B/cwhile DM is focusing in on the court finding that selling videogame cheats is criminal copyright infringement and RICO, I'd like to tell you about something different. The CFAA, and @KathrynTewson
And don't get me wrong - that RICO stuff is big news that should be sending shockwaves through the cheat software industry. Cheatmakers often use resellers. Being found liable on a RICO violation means that every reseller could potentially be liable for 100% of the damage caused
by the cheat software.

And by 100%, of course, I mean 300%, since RICO comes with treble damages. Plus attorneys' fees. So that's a big deal.

As is the finding that it's criminal copyright infringement. Those are both new precedents in the area, and that's huge.
Read 21 tweets
Mar 8, 2023
I'm not inclined to forgive antisemitism, but this is more a learning opportunity than a defenestration opportunity. There are people who still legitimately don't understand that "Jew down" or "gyp" are slurs; it's just a phrase they've grown up around and use w/o thought
And yes, he doubled down when called out on it. That's almost always going to happen when someone who sincerely doesn't believe they're doing anything bigoted is called out for it in a public setting.

The real test will be whether he can learn (& apologize) as he gets more info
Also, HOLY FUCKING SHIT @pnj, you couldn't find an *actual* Jew to get a quote from, so you decided to go to a Christian LARPing as a Jew for missionizing purposes? What the absolute fuck? pnj.com/story/news/loc…
Read 4 tweets

Did Thread Reader help you today?

Support us! We are indie developers!


This site is made by just two indie developers on a laptop doing marketing, support and development! Read more about the story.

Become a Premium Member ($3/month or $30/year) and get exclusive features!

Become Premium

Don't want to be a Premium member but still want to support us?

Make a small donation by buying us coffee ($5) or help with server cost ($10)

Donate via Paypal

Or Donate anonymously using crypto!

Ethereum

0xfe58350B80634f60Fa6Dc149a72b4DFbc17D341E copy

Bitcoin

3ATGMxNzCUFzxpMCHL5sWSt4DVtS8UqXpi copy

Thank you for your support!

Follow Us!

:(