Christian Payne Profile picture
Aug 7, 2021 145 tweets 72 min read Read on X
Leaving home and heading to London. #CyclingHz cyclinghertz.com Image
Heading to London, the start of my charity ride to Edinburgh. The guy in the ticket office told me I won’t be able to bring my bike back on the Edinburgh train on Sunday the 15th. Hoping @LNER can help at KingsX CyclingHertz.com Image
This little doodad enables you to quickly nip to the toilet and not worry about somebody wandering off with your bike. It also stops the bike falling over. #CyclingHz Image
Before my train got to London Sam from @LNER has got my bike booked on a train back from Edinburgh. Hurrah!
All I need to do is get there now. #CyclingHertz
Just arrived in a very wet London. Heading towards Smithfield market for the official start point of my journey. #CyclingHz cyclinghertz.com Image
I’m at Snow Hill. The starting point of my journey. Just accidentally hit record so made a video I will share. ImageImage
An impromptu video at the official beginning of my journey. #CyclingHz cyclinghertz.com
This is a great start. Not sure whether to wait it out or just plough on. I know it really makes me want a wee. #CyclingHz
After seeing other cyclists facing the deluge I decided to join them. My entire body is saturated. Luckily I’m not wearing underwear. Now trying to get out of London. #CyclingHz
It’s stopped raining and I made my first #hamr contacts on the trip. Thanks to G4WIP Alan
And G4CJC Tony on GB3LP. #CyclingHz Image
I think Steve silk a.k.a. @Greatnorthroad2 missed out some cycling tips. #CyclingHZ
20 slow miles into the day and the scene has somewhat changed. #CyclingHz Image
That road was lovely but I appear to have my first puncture. What’s the procedure with tubeless tires? :-) #CyclingHz also just rode through a bush of stinging nettles. But that’s the least of my worries. Image
I have found a puncture. Hoping it might self seal. It was a massive thorn though. Image
Great… while pumping up the tire I’ve now trodden in an ants nest. I kid you not. I should’ve chosen a different hashtag #CyclingHertz Image
Okay how far am I from the nearest bike shop. Preferably to the north of me…? w3w.co/gears.dash.ear…
Got a lift with a beekeeper called Barry! He is taking me to the bike shop. Left my bike at his house near where i got the puncture. #cyclingHz Image
Thanks to Cycle Hub in Hatfield I’m getting my tyre sorted. Getting an inner tube put in. And some Marathon plus tyres on. #CyclingHZ Image
Two new tires and inner tubes with built in force fields. :-)
Many thanks to Dave and India from Cycle Hub and of course Barry the beekeeper from @hatfieldhouse who came to the rescue. A true gentleman. Back on the road! #CyclingHz Image
Just in case you forgot my route. #CyclingHz Image
Now here’s a bit of history… #CyclingHz ImageImage
Popular with people called Samuel. Image
A personal milestone. Even if it’s not that much :-) #CyclingHz
Refilling my bottles (with water) at a pub in Baldock. Very friendly people. Getting back on the bike as the heavens open once again. #CyclingHz Image
The Sun is now shining on Baldock. Image
51 miles in. Stopping for a celebratory pasty in Langford. #CyclingHz CyclingHertz.com Image
Funny what you see on the road. Charlie has just built this Surron electric bike. He’s took the pedals off. Check his Insta: @DC_TransporT Image
Last bit of the journey thankfully @sladedesign has come out to ride with me for the last few miles for some moral support. #CyclingHz ImageImage
End of day one. I made it to my chosen destination. #CyclingHz
I just listened back to this. There is a little jibber-ish in there. Must be tired :-) I said it’s the hardest thing I’ve ever done. Not true. It’s the hardest bike ride I’ve ever done. And it’s only day one.. :-)
I had an ice bath as soon as I got in. No idea how long I needed to lying there. Followed it with a big plate of pasta. Bit late for eating but somebody told me that’s the done thing. Now to crash. Image
Day two of #CyclingHz please check out the update I’ve posted on cyclinghertz.com.
Just about to head off with the wind in my face. If you could all please blow to the North I might be in with a chance
I managed to book a hotel in Bawtree! Which has the added benefit of making tomorrow’s trip a little bit shorter. No need for help from Doncaster. Thank you so much for looking though. #CyclingHz
This is why I’m so slow… constant modifications… Image
I totally prefer the old Old North Road compared to the Great North Road at the moment. Next stop Stilton. #CyclingHz Image
I’m getting mast envy. #CyclingHz #Hamr ImageImage
Hungry and running out of energy. Just followed a village shop sign downhill into the village of Elton. But was told by Katrina who lives here that the shop was closed on Sunday. Then she very kindly gave me some juice and an almond butter sandwich :-) ImageImage
I just heard an ice cream van in the distance. In the middle of nowhere. It must be a mirage. Image
It’s amazing how fast you can cycle when you see an ice cream van pull up. #CyclingHz Image
Headwinds and barbedwire Are not my friend today.
For example… Image
Only taken a few wrong turns but it’s always ended up somewhere nice. #CyclingHz Image
Scratch that last tweet. Although it would’ve made a great very last tweet. I just took a wrong turn and it took me up the gnarliest most painful I run out of gears kind of hill.
Today’s ride ended just north of Grantham. Thanks to @jimrobbins for introducing me to his family Malcolm’s and Christine (@ExhibitionsGM) …amazing hosts! Im full of food and ready for bed. ImageImageImage
I actually feel rested. And my phone had the picture of the sun on when I picked it up. Might be a good day for peddling. Once again many thanks to Malcolm and Christine (@ExhibitionsGM) for being such wonderful hosts. #CyclingHz Image
After a hairy stroll across the A1 at rush-hour this is the road ahead. Hoping to make Bawtree by this afternoon. 50 miles to go. #CyclingHertz ImageImage
Just mat two retired gentleman on bikes with full panniers cycling down the same ex-railway line as me. I asked them where they were going and they told me they had a 7 mile bike ride ahead of them. I couldn’t help but think that that’s how I should be doing it :-) #CyclingHz Image
Today I plan to take a break every 10 miles to see if that helps with the pace and exhaustion. I’ve also learned the co-op coffee is better than no coffee. #CyclingHz Image
Just stopped to put some suncream on. Which means it will rain in a minute. #CyclingHz Image
It started to rain about five minutes after I put the sunscreen. On a better note though, I must thank Sunnyside Cottage for offering me the best food stop of the day. #CyclingHz ImageImageImage
Some of these roads are not really roads. Road bikes need not apply. #CyclingHz Image
Quick tour of the bike 1 vid of 2. #CyclingHz
The other stuff on the bike. #CyclingHz
This is a fast sandy road until all of a sudden it isn’t. So far my slightly thinner tires have coped well. So far. Image
Another amazing coaching inn that I won’t be stopping for a beer in. I did pop in and have a look around. Image
Day three in the bag. Looking forward to it shower, a beer, and a beer. This is my home for the night, the Crown Hotel in Bawtry. cyclinghertz.com
I found a place that serves health drinks while you wait for your meal. Image
Who is the patron saint of cyclists?
I wonder if he can turn off the tap on this torrential downpour by the time I finish breakfast. Image
Some how picked up cyclist’s palsy yesterday. My first proper cycling injury. Even with continually changing my hand positions on the handlebars the ulnar nerve in my right hand must have been compressed. Changing gears might be interesting today. #CyclingHertz
I’ll be honest when I left the hotel this morning I had a little cry. Not sure if it was the sleepless night, the pain in my right hand or the fact that on exiting the building I was met with the sun coming out and a downhill to start the day. Is there a word for a happy sad cry? Image
Popped into Cycle Supreme to see if they had and tri bars. A drastic way of changing my hand position. But they don’t. Thankfully Jamie kindly offered to lift the bars 10 mm which may make a difference. #CyclingHz ImageImageImage
Did I forget to say this is day four? The rollercoaster continues. #CyclingHz
More photos of Campsall church… and after hearing yesterday of a woman page 49 going for a bike ride and dropping dead, I accidentally parked my bike next to a gravestone of someone who also died at 49. What is the universe trying to tell me? #CyclingHz ImageImageImage
Stumbled upon a quality fuel stop. Darshan has run this chip shop for 38 years and loves it :-) #CyclingHz ImageImage
This is one of those down hills where I pause at the top and consider casing the bottom but no… I’m just going to go hell for leather as fast as I can. #cyclinghz Image
After that last tweet my legs & the bike got covered in clay which has now hardened, I also had an altercation with a concrete post on a muddy path/cycle track/death trap, but thankfully the bike took most of the brunt. Somehow I lost my mini tripod and phone clamp along the way. Image
20 miles till the halfway mark on my journey from London to Edinburgh. I thought I’d give the bike a spruce up for the occasion. #CyclingHz Image
This is it! The halfway mark on my London to Edinburgh cycle. Thank you for everyone who has sponsored so far. All going to plan I will get another update out tonight on.. cyclinghertz.com
I also want to thank all my Internet friends who have spurred me on and those who have also researched and or found me accommodation along route. Your kindness, time and encouragement mean so much to me. Image
Just had dinner at the renamed Angel Inn. An amazing coaching house with fascinating history. Seems to be wasted on a huge Italian restaurant. Food was OK, service mediocre as it’s massive & understaffed. ImageImage
Day five on the road will involve more of this… #CyclingHz Last night I posted an update on cyclinghertz.com just in case you missed it.
Next stop Darlington.
This is a bit cool. I wonder if the Devil’s arrow is coming up from the Earth or just landed from the sky. #CyclingHz ImageImage
Many thanks to @LangthorpeFS for gifting me a couple of bananas for the road ahead. Lovely people and a definite stop should you be cycling or driving past. ImageImage
I wonder if the guy who lives here has the callsign G7KHF. #cyclingHz #Hamr ImageImage
Found Gordon’s Wood and thought he might live here.

So popped in to explore.
Sadly though I think Gordon has died.

His kids still write to him on Birthdays and Christmas though.

So yes. Gordon does live here. ImageImageImage
Just had the pleasure of meeting Paul Tribe of North Yorkshire cycles. Refill my water bottles and bought some chain wax. #CyclingHz Image
Just got to Darlington. Quite shaky I need to remember to eat when not hungry. It was 52 miles here but a bacon/tomato cob, 2 bananas, a mini pie, 2 energy bars, a small pot of ice cream, apple, pear & satsuma was not enough fuel. I’ll learn. Image
Anybody in Darlington (the top end) know where I can get a bath full of rice and a fork? #cyclinghz
I found rice. Also some time to recap day one...
And I've had to up the target because YOU PEOPLE ARE AMAZING!! documentally.substack.com/p/cycling-hert… #CyclingHertz
Day six. Next stop Newcastle. #CyclingHz
Prodding along. Not many people to talk to. #CyclingHz Image
Funnily enough that’s just what I was thinking… #CyclingHz Image
Thanks to @RobKingComposer for taking this snap on the way into Newcastle/Gateshead #CyclingHz Image
With the helpful guidance of @RobKingComposer I am now in Gateshead. Rob is the first cyclist to be riding in the same direction as me (that I didn’t know) :-) #CyclingHz Image
A rare catchup with @simfin who has brought me some handy tech to replace what I lost on the road. #cyclingHz ImageImage
End of #CyclingHz day six. 500km done. Three days to go.
cyclingHertz.com
Day 7 of #CyclingHz heading to the coast.
Better than a bike bell. #CyclingHz
Been lucky with the. Weather so far. Looks like there might be rain ahead though. #CyclingHz Image
The rain came and went. Now here comes the sun. The weather plays a defining part in your day when you are totally immersed in it. As much as I enjoy a good wind bath, I also like to feel a few warm rays while rolling along. CyclingHertz.com Image
Why do some cyclists like hills? #cyclingHz
Bloody beautiful round here. Well done Northumberland. #CyclingHz
Some downhills i’ll gladly pay for.
paying for. #CyclingHz
I can see the sea! Image
Scran. #CyclingHz Image
Car park light. Oh and a castle. #CyclingHz Image
Locals #CyclingHz Image
Nice pad. #cyclingHz Image
Sometimes an extra little burst of energy can come out of nowhere.
This helps.
Nothing for miles then an oasis in the wild. #cyclingHz
Passing Bamburgh Castle. Still looking for accommodation here or further on the Great North Road …but not too far. Getting tired now. #CyclingHz
This is me passing the Castle… Image
And this is my home for the night! Not only the last room at the inn. Thanks to a cancellation it just popped up and it was the only room in Seahouses. Ending day seven here. #CyclingHz Image
My routine as soon as I find a room is use the loo. Run a cold bath to heal my legs. Wash me & my cycling gear in the shower & hang it up to dry. Eat all the biscuits with a cup of decaf Earl Grey. Check for local #Hamr chatter. Put my devices on charge and go & find some food. ImageImageImageImage
I want to saw an attachment where you can turn hookless hotel coat hangers Into normal ones. No need though. There is normally a good few places you can wedge them to dry wet clothes. Image
Mozzarella tomato salad followed by vegetarian lasagna, followed by ginger treacle sponge with custard.
If there’s one thing the last 600 km peddling has taught me, it is that you have to eat everything you see just to be able to get out of bed the following day. #CyclingHz Image
A great spot to contemplate the last seven days as well as the two still to come. CyclingHertz.com ImageImageImageImage
Day 8 Seahouses to Dunbar. I have added an update on the @chooselove page here... Thanks everyone. See you on the road after I finish packing... donate.chooselove.org/supporters/cyc…
I’m only one hour into day eight and I’d like to lie down on some soft grass and go for a little sleep. A week should do it. So far it’s been a headwind no matter where I go. Mostly uphill. if I can find snippets of cycling route one with high hedges I take them. #CyclingHz ImageImage
Every corner is a change of scene. #CyclingHz Image
No windshield for full effect. #cyclingHz
Getting wilder. You can have a wee round here without anybody knowing. #cyclingHz Image
Found a shell on the beach. #cyclingHz Image
Looking for coffee now. #cyclingHz
Exciting. I might get to hang out with people again :-) #CyclingHz Image
This might be the slowest days cycling yet. If I’m not battling hills I’m battling the wind and if I’m not battling them I’m battling myself. Even my satnav has turned against me. I’ve started following the compass needle and this is most definitely a bit further north.
I’m now officially an international cyclist.
Soon as I see a sign advertising cake I’m stopping for my late lunch. #cyclingHz
I have felt the power of the wind all day but it’s good to see it in action. #CyclingHz Image
Pausing before the top of the hill. The longest hill I’ve ever cycled up.
Currently eating some cake. Roadside cake. The best kind. Given to me by two strangers working in the garden in their house in the middle of nowhere. I’m sorry I didn’t get their names. We may never meet again but I just wanted you to know they’re out there.
Best. Downhill. Ride. Ever.
Blue sky and a smooth, steep, seemingly never ending meandering coastal road. I was holding on for my life, chin on the bars.
All the way to the water. #CyclingHz
Getting closer… #cyclingHz
End of day 8. Thank you @mazzacampbell and Prav for their hospitality in Dunbar. Edinburgh tomorrow! Thankyou for all your donations! cyclinghertz.com
Morning all. Lying in bed contemplating the last day of riding. It’s been a rough night. I’ve been kept awake with some gastro intestinal issues which it’s apparently common with prolonged exertion. cyclingtips.com/2017/09/gut-pr…
Nearly there though! #CyclingHz
Wow! I just saw how close we are to £2000 raised and would love to hit that goal on this the last day. It would be a fantastic ending to this trip. donate.chooselove.org/supporters/cyc…
What a fantastic sendoff this morning, not just from Rob, Prav and family but I’ve just found out we’ve smashed the target! Much love everyone, thank you so very much. ❤️ Image
Day nine. The last day of my journey from London to Edinburgh. Thanks again for all your help. Today will be a slow ride as explained in the video :-) if you want you can track said slow progress in the link.

wahooligan.com/users/live/f8D…
Dropping this in here to continue the thread.
Tattle scones seem safe to eat. We’ll see I guess. #cyclingHz Image
Stopped to explore Hailes Castle. ImageImage
I finally get to use my tools! And it’s to fix an electric bike. :-) #CyclingHz Image
Stopped at the first coffee and cake shop I could find. Falco. It’s amazing and just so turns out to be the former headquarters of the Cycle Touring Club. #CyclingHz ImageImage
Riding with Jack Butler and friends. #cyclinghz ImageImage
Nearly there. #CyclingHz Image
On the outskirts! #CyclingHz ImageImage
Just been met for the last bit of the ride by @toby10ant. Heading to the end of the great North Road. Somewhere near the Balmoral Hotel. Image
This is it. The end of the road! Thank you to everybody that has followed the journey to this point. It’s been a mad and amazing nine days. #CyclingHz CyclingHertz.com Image
Thank you to @toby10ant for riding the last few miles with me and for @VinylRevivalUK for meeting me with some whisky! ImageImage
I made it. #CyclingHz
Thanks to @dshirlaw I got into the train showered and changed. What a gent! Image
Nodding off on a train.
Heading back the way I came. ImageImage
Home now. It was faster in reverse.
Listening to the hum of the Great North Road outside my window.
Glad we got to know each other better.
Here is a collection of the 9 routes I took from London to Edinburgh... #CyclingHz komoot.com/collection/128…
I'm slowly writing up my journal for each day on the road. I'll post them to my weekly email feed. documentally.substack.com/p/cycling-hert…
Starting to feel more human. Looking forward to the next bike ride. Although I fancy something about 100x shorter. Latest email... documentally.substack.com/p/transcribing…

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