Disabled children need to learn how to identify, accept and seek support for their needs.

Disabled adults need continued acceptance AND support.

Disability doesn't magically go away at age 18.
Give me a complex problem, a thick, verbose book, anything that I can sit down with by myself and figure out - sure, I can do that all day long.

Shopping, parties, paperwork, going to the dentist, all of that shit? Overwhelming as fuck. It's HARD.
So many things that are supposedly 'easy' or 'routine' for people are hard. And, if you say they're hard, people look down on you for it. But, it is hard. Do you know how many times in a grocery store, it felt like I was suffocating and I wanted to lay down?
Do you know how many times I've had to spent copious amounts of time in bathrooms because that's the only half way calm space in a crowded location? (If you're lucky enough not to have blasting music in there).
I am not 'stupid' or 'incapable' or anything negative. My brain and body just cannot handle certain input. I need help. And, it's not wrong to need help. I need understanding. I need respect. I am tired of fighting and faking it.
Seeking support isn't weak or lazy. It's the healthy thing to do. But, society doesn't encourage it. Sure, we get some lip service about 'mental health' but REAL support systems don't exist. People still have such limited views on what disability entails.
Disabled people have a lot to offer the world, but we need our unique needs met. We cannot make the most of our abilities, if we're fighting through the 'basic' grind in life that's anything but basic for us.

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More from @awesomebrandi

14 Sep
I live in this really weird in between spot that not a lot of people live in. I grew up in extreme poverty, and now I am middle class. I live in a 'nice' neighborhood in a 'nice' house, that we happened to get a killer deal on at the time.
I normally feel like I don't belong here. I am still the poor girl that I grew up as, inside. Yet, I spend time with people who have money, and even if they had less growing up, not many people can relate to what I went through and how that trauma affected me.
It's hard for me to feel comfortable with people who've never experienced oppression of some sort. That's why pretty much all my friends are traumatized, disabled or both. Plus, a lot of immigrants and BIPOC. Those people are the people I feel safe with.
Read 10 tweets
13 Sep
When people talk about their Autistic, or otherwise disabled children, they often bring up 'independence'. But, we need to shift from the idea of 'independence' to 'autonomy'. By providing support to O via typing, he has more AUTONOMY, and therefore a higher quality of life.
If I simply said 'well, he has to be fully independent' that reduces his quality of life, because he wouldn't be able to fully communicate the nuance of wants and needs he has. Independence is a false concept, anyway. Most people aren't ever 'fully independent'.
But for some reason, with disabled people in particular, there is an obsession with independence and bootstrapping. And, then we leave people struggling so hard that they really have no actual control over their lives, because they can't get that first step up.
Read 4 tweets
10 Sep
Helped Z go through and do a clothing 'reset' and I've been working on listing stuff on Poshmark.. finally. I used to give clothes away all the time, but I need the money, so I am going to try my hand at actually selling stuff.
We also picked up a few more things at the used clothing store for her 'aesthetic'. I love that she's expressing more of a set style that she likes, and it may be the polar opposite of what I like, but I'm trying to understand and support her feeling good as herself.
If you want to follow my Poshmark, you can see it here: poshmark.com/closet/awesome… Right now I am starting with some of the oldest stuff I had packed away (I am definitely nowhere near a size two anymore lol), but I have tons more to add.
Read 4 tweets
12 Aug
Story time. Three years ago, when we were at this same beach and same condo, we met a family with two kids that we hit it off with. They even live in our local area! Then, go figure, we ended up showing up again at the same place. They are also creatures of habit.
Anyway, this time we are basically spending the whole week at the same time, and it has been wonderful. Their kids are ND, so they treat our kids completely normal - they respect their differences, without othering them. It’s been absolutely wonderful, and a bit uncanny.
I guess life is telling me we really need to be friends, because it brought us together again. And, to see their son ask O to play, just like any typical kid, and not be uncomfortable around him, it means so much.
Read 6 tweets
22 Jul
So, I started my morning with absolute panic, finding out one of my daughter's fully vaccinated dance teachers, who she was literally just in a room with YESTERDAY, has Covid. My daughter has been masked the entire time, thank god, and I hope it was enough. But, I'm freaking out.
Bless her, she has even offered to wear a mask in the house to protect her brother, just in case. We will go get her tested in a few days. Please keep your fingers crossed for us that the mask did it's job. Thankfully, we can lock down the next couple of weeks.
It's so, so fucking frustrating, because her dance studio was like SUPER SAFE and masked, and distanced for most of the time, and then like, it just all went to the wind, and most of the teachers stopped wearing masks once they were vaccinated (except her solo teacher, yay).
Read 6 tweets
20 Jul
When you run a #smallbusiness - there is so much that goes into it, that people don't see. The rates I charge for my services have to cover my time for so many things I do 'behind the scenes'. It's NOT only my time spent directly with the client.
Outside of the regular stuff like photographing people, emailing or phoning them, editing, reviewing their photos with them, designing, placing orders, delivering or mailing orders.. There is so much more stuff I do that takes time.
I have to keep my website updated, do accounting, pay my taxes, do social media, keep my equipment and software up to date, review and modify documents like pricing, contracts, releases, etc. I need to update my pricing guide, order supplies I'm low on, clean my studio.
Read 7 tweets

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