Once you are courageous/free enough to talk about issues openly, you begin to realize that silence/shadows create a power over many people, and they suffer alone, because they think they struggle alone. Nothing human can be alien to any human. Shaming another is to shame oneself
So when anything comes to the public domain, after all the furor - the faux/real outrage, in your quiet corners ask yourself - what has this got to do with me/my life? What is the learning for me in my career, business, life, relationships - with self and others? Pay attention...
The personal is universal. The personal is also political. This to me, is a real positive power of social media - we realize that we are all in the same energetic field, and the pain or joy of one, is the pain/joy of all - in different dimensions. It is how we grow/heal/evolve..
The mirror has 2 faces - we're more alike than we care to ever examine. If you stare at them long enough - Kanu & Buhari are not so different after all. BMCs & IPOB are more alike than they care to admit. Men and Women wield power in eerily similar ways. We mirror our rulers too.
The myth of our "separateness" is just that - a myth. If nothing, the pandemic shows us that the ignorance and misogyny in America mirrors that in a lot of the Arab world they rail against, that terrorism exists under the guise of different religions, that corruption is universal
Perhaps, this is what the pandemic and global strife/violence/divisions are all about - to bring us to a place of reset - to make us pause and really look in the mirror, and recognize ourselves in other, and then begin the needed inner self-work of narrowing our integrity gaps..
Perhaps, we are all Annie and Tuface e.g in our relationship with our rulers, our consciences/choices. E.g We, the elite that voted for/supported PMB in 2015, did we not see his Pero antecedents? Yes, we're right to hold him accountable now, but at what cost to our mental health?
And @ what point do we say the unity of the Nigerian union is no longer worth working towards? At what point is the abuse enough? Can we forgive our leaders like Tega's hubby forgave her? Are we also as guilty as he was in cheating? Is breaking up the answer as advocated by IPOB?
Annie, like all spouses who have reached a breaking point, cried out publicly and was ridiculed. Is this not how some scoff at IPOB, Shiites, EndSARS protesters, and invalidate their pain but only see them outing out their grievances? The gaslighting and whataboutism seem similar
We are glued to BBN and al, while terrorists/bandits have a field day, and politicians carry on with weddings and commissioning. Is this much needed escapism, cowardice or wilful denial to our realities? In many ways, pop culture intersects with politics. Reel has become real..vv
I hope we see ourselves in realities all around us. Perhaps there are no accidents or coincidences in the universe, & the events that come to our attention are there to make us more aware/mindful, and begin the real inner self-work. We have a People/Institution/Structure Problem.
The End/ The institutional dysfunctions are rooted in the behavioural. Whether it is in navigating personal relationships, or btw leaders and citizens (civic contract), we need ACCOUNTABILITY & CONSEQUENCES, or abuse will be normalized. VALUES matter, as do STRONG INSTITUTIONS🙏

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More from @julietkego

13 Sep
Was it intentional? The shabby outfit of PMB in Imo. It just doesn't add up sha. At all. We should validly hold him accountable for a lot of heinous crimes/massacres & for having a terrible media team/ministers, but the President's stylist & photographer have always been on point
"The Magician and the Politician have much in common; they both have to draw our attention away from what they are really doing..." -

Ben Okri, OBE | Poet & Novelist

____________
Was Imo visit really about Imo/commissioning, or more about Anambra and 2023? Time will tell sha.
May it not be said of the South East Region that while youth were distracted by the President's outfit and their "success" at boycotting a presidential visit, the APC gained three states in the SE. Some PDP folks worked against their party in 2019. Will they do same in 2021/2023?
Read 4 tweets
13 Sep
#NigeriansinCanada - "In 2016 Census, 51,800 people identified as Nigerians, with over half living in Ontario. There are many more Nigerians in Canada, who identified themselves by their ethnicity instead of their country - such as 9,600 as Yoruba, 5,600 as Igbo, & 1,900 as Edo."
“In the last few years, the number of Nigerians seeking to emigrate to Canada has maintained an upward trajectory. Canadian immigration policies have also in the last few years made the country emerge as an attractive destination of choice for many Nigerians – compared to the UK"
"Nigerian immigration to Canada more than tripled in the five years before the arrival of the COVID-19 pandemic and a new study shows this “Canada Rush” was driven by a longing for a more prosperous future."

#NigeriansinCanada #Emigration #TheCanadianRush
Read 17 tweets
12 Sep
First, learn how to love yourself, be at peace with yourself, have joy by yourself.

Then you can invite someone else to share in that joy/love/peace, and be a witness to your becoming.

If the person brings toxicity/disrespect/abuse/lack of love, of what value are they to you?
If you do not love yourself, or have peace in yourself, have joy from within, & you only seek to escape your own life and outsource your agency for joy, love, peace to someone else, or lack self esteem/worth, you will likely attract a level of toxicity/disrespect/abuse, not love.
If you are at war with yourself and your value, no one can give you peace/joy. No matter how someone loves you, your joy/peace are your primary responsibilities.

A revelatory/revolutionary part of the Bible wrt to relationship/marriage for me is:
1+1 = 1

NOT
0.5 + 1

OR
0.5+0.5
Read 4 tweets
12 Sep
One of the biggest ironies in Nigeria is seeing some Southerners demeaning some Northern women who willingly choose polygamy

The joke is that many Southern men sign up for monogamy at the altar but are clearly practicing a one-sided open union by having mistresses/smallies/sides
So the Northern woman who has willingly chosen polygamy is better prepared mentally, & by social conditioning/religion to handle it in a harmonious way

Compared to the Southern woman who lives in denial, or is now compelled by religion/family to swallow/accept a community penis
While the Northern women in polygamy co-exist as co-wives/sister wives, & have some sort of agreed hierarchy/inheritance system for all their children, the Southern woman has to contend with "adversaries"/minefield re inheritance esp if a mistress has a male child & she does not.
Read 7 tweets
12 Sep
📌For a society with millions living in abject & multidimensional poverty, with folks begging non-stop, why do so many arrogantly demonize the poor/strip them of dignity?

📌 For a country that typically ranks high on pornhub stats for viewership, why all the hypocrisy about sex?
If anything, we should Mainstream in our curriculum, courses that teach all citizens about the fundamentals if human dignity for all, regardless of socio-economic strata. And uphold the sanctity, supremacy, value, respect for all lives.

And include age-appropriate SRHR Education
📌 📍People have a right to celibacy/abstinence

Just as much as they have a right to being sexually active

It's about people's right & dignity to their CHOICES, without being shamed/demonized/judged/stigmatized for either choice

Focus on teaching about Choices and Consequences
Read 4 tweets
11 Sep
Abstinence is a form of birth control, & of preventing STDs/STIs

As is using contraceptives

Having one partner at a time/being faithful to each other also helps to prevent STDs/STIs

You may choose abstinence - pure celibacy or abstinence with self help by hand/toys

📌Ted Talk
Sexual liberation/revolution is about CHOICES

Body Autonomy, Full Agency, Consent Education should focus on CHOICES & CONSEQUENCES, not on shaming people for choices

People have the right to CHOOSE celibacy/abstinence. Just as they have a right to be sexually active.

Ted Talk
"Purity Culture" is not about CHOICES -Rather about an insidious systemic use of patriarchy to control the agency of women/girls, & measuring the being-ness/worth/value of women/girls as a function of their hymen/vagina/virginity. It fuels to child marriage/rape/honour killings.. Image
Read 4 tweets

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