I dunno what word I'd use for this -- "gaslighting" doesn't seem quite right -- but it's shocking how successful communities like this are at getting you paranoid that "everyone hates you" and no one who knows you casually has any fucking idea what they mean
WAS the letter invasive and creepy and cringey and shit?

The dude didn't have to reply! He could've "ghosted" her completely -- "ghosting" is the NORMAL DEFAULT in this situation!

He went out of his way to meet with her! It seems like he liked the letter!
WAS everyone revolted at how narcissistic and self-involved her cringey video on the Jumbotron was?

Can't find ANYONE saying that shit about her "post-donation media blitz" -- probably because if a normal person said that about someone who donated a kidney you'd get punched
This normie dude legit GAVE HER CREDIT FOR INSPIRING HIM TO DONATE

"Feeding her narcissistic supply", as they say

You get the sense Sonya's clique was as aggressive and vicious about trying to create the impression "everyone hates her" BECAUSE THEY KNOW THEY DON'T
THEY KEPT CALLING HER ASKING HER TO DO SHIT

IT'S WHAT THEY WANT YOU TO DO

BEING WILLING TO KEEP ON VOLUNTEERING TO REPRESENT THE ORG AT EVENTS A YEAR AFTER YOU DONATE MAKES YOU *AN UNUSUALLY HELPFUL VOLUNTEER*
Treating you as though you've become some narcissistic grasping predator thirsting for people's emotional energy like a cringey Karen vampire because *you answer people's calls* and *you agree to do things they asked you to do*

That IS gaslighting, actually
Goddammit

I was never even really that famous but still

"Hey Arthur, you wanna record this promo with us for the radio station? You can link the video on your channel, we'd love the exposure on your platform"
"Uh... I dunno if you want me to do that guys, people think I'm kind of an attention hog online"

"The hell is that supposed to mean? That's what online is for"

"Yeah well my corner of online is kind of... judgey"
Seriously the corner of Twitter or any other platform where you can JUST PROMOTE YOUR STUFF because THAT'S WHAT THE PLATFORM IS FOR and you don't have to apologize for it or put a veneer of irony around it or somehow "compensate" for doing it

Must be so fucking freeing
Kind of like the way some people react to finding out there are levels of privilege where you really can just directly ask your boss for more money and it's an open negotiation and the faux pas doesn't instantly lead to you being blackballed and fired
Anyway

If Dawn's a "bad advocate" for kidney donation Sonya sure as hell is a "bad advocate" for... whatever the fuck she was supposed to be advocating for

Not being racist, I guess?

Yeah that cause has taken an unfortunate hit
(I'm so mad I'm so mad I'm so FUCKING mad you fucking used race and privilege and "the Asian community" as a shield for your white group of friends to play your sadistic mind games

You indirectly used ME for it - you had me ON YOUR SIDE - and I will not forgive you for that)

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More from @arthur_affect

13 Oct
Sitting here wondering if they'll tell me I have to lose weight to make it through the donor screening (if you're REALLY fat the FAQ says they'll just exclude you, but someone at my level of fat "may be asked to lose weight)
And I mean like I'm like

"Is that actually a good reason to lose weight"

And then I'm like

"If that's NOT a good reason then what would a good reason even be"
It's not saying I agree with the rule to say that if that is the rule and I can't donate otherwise then it might make a lifesaving difference to someone else if I at least try right

I dunno
Read 4 tweets
13 Oct
The litfic world comes off TERRIBLY here

And it's not just snobbery and cliquishness, which of course is everywhere

It really is something specific to this kind of "artistic community" - the insistence that your ONLY real responsibility as a Writer is to your own "truth"
That if you think there's any competing interest to "your truth", like THE truth, then you're the same as all the censorious Christian moms who ban books and shit

That there's nothing that being a Writer is ABOUT other than vomiting up your feelings onto the page
And look it's not like I hate and despise litfic and only read books that have robots or dragons or both

I do strongly believe that ultimately the only point of writing books is "emotional truth", is feeling like you've formed some connection with another person's experience
Read 12 tweets
13 Oct
@JuliaaGuliaaa @Random832 @AnaMardoll @Crystal_Ball1 @brigidkeely Lol yeah I'm trying to picture what kind of car accident this was, like did a single piece of flying shrapnel just somehow travel along the EXACT vector to shoot through both her kidneys and touch no other vital organs
@JuliaaGuliaaa @Random832 @AnaMardoll @Crystal_Ball1 @brigidkeely Or if she was already losing most of her kidney function, on dialysis regularly -- but somehow still drinking! -- and THEN the stress from the car accident was the last straw

You can try to make some scenario work
@JuliaaGuliaaa @Random832 @AnaMardoll @Crystal_Ball1 @brigidkeely Oh and in the story it explains why she meets the donor despite her extreme reluctance, her husband insists on it

...Weirdly, it says nothing about the husband offering to donate his own kidney, or becoming part of a transplant chain
Read 26 tweets
12 Oct
Okay one more

I can already see the narrative building that I'm a guy, and so is Dan Nguyen (who posted one of the first viral threads collating evidence that Sonya was in fact the asshole)

And as MEN of color we just don't understand the WoC vs WW dynamic
(Even though the FIRST really big such thread, the one the haters called "obsessive" in much the same tone people used for Dawn, whose author keeps on periodically locking to avoid harassment, was written by a WoC)

But okay
The narrative is that "You're a man who exists in a het world, you were raised to seek approval and validation from white women, your internalized racism and misogyny means you put white women on a pedestal and throw WoC especially of your own race under the bus"
Read 12 tweets
12 Oct
You know why this is so galling right

Why it feels so personal to so many people

It's not even that I think donating a kidney is the HARDEST or the BEST thing a human being can do

It's just that this is UNAMBIGUOUS

If this isn't enough, NOTHING is enough
It's the Cool Kids with all the social privilege saying "It doesn't matter WHAT you do

You don't have the power to make us respect you

We get to just decide that based on anything we want"

And making this a progressive statement! Making it "woke"! Making it all defiant!
What because the asshole who started it is a WoC talking to a white lady so this is a statement that "Your white privilege doesn't apply here! You can't MAKE me respect you for doing ANYTHING, you entitled white bitch!"

And then all these white women AND WHITE MEN join in!
Read 28 tweets
12 Oct
@CurrentReligion @AsaZernik @theDwarf It's amazing that Dawn promoting actually DOING the thing of donating a kidney for a year was massive narcissism

But Sonya has been promoting this short story she wrote about her own feels about kidney donation being BAD, for SIX YEARS

Promoting it HARD
@CurrentReligion @AsaZernik @theDwarf Seriously the fact that this one 20-page story is the only thing she's written that people really care about and so she's never stopped talking about it or shilling it is...

I mean I don't think it WOULD be "cringe" if it were someone else
@CurrentReligion @AsaZernik @theDwarf That's life, that's the hustle

But to think that you shopping around your little staggering work of literary genius is somehow humbler and more down-to-earth and "normal" than what Dawn did

Oh my God
Read 11 tweets

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