Reflecting on the One Year Anniversary of my Mom’s Death
Shelly Nowak 12/24/1965 - 11/25/202
Grief is a strange thing. This year has been very difficult - I never expected that as a young adult and a priest of only 1.5 years, I’d be burying my mother. I’ve learned many things during this past year and I want to share just a few.
1. Grief is real and people grieve in various ways. Don’t let anyone tell you how you’re “supposed’ to grieve. People tend to believe that grief shrinks over time. What really happens is that we grow around our grief.
2. Be patient with yourself. Everything is different now - accept that. Give yourself time to cry, the mourn, to heal, and simply to feel all the feelings.
3. Be patient with your family. Each one of them had a different relationship with your loved one and is handling their grief differently.
4. Be patient with your friends - good intentioned as they may be, they will never understand. Don’t hold that against them.
5. Grief and joy can co-exist and you don’t have to feel guilty for those moments of joy.
6. Pray. Lean into the grace of the Sacraments. Relate everything to God, even when you don’t want to.

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