Okay so I got a new binder and honestly the gender euphoria is unreal right now holy shit
IT FITS SO NICE TOO
Please forgive my face but I'm a dumbass who got 6 hours of sleep and has a dental cleaning at ass o clock am so I am TIRED
I've been using an old binder from my ex for ages and I just thought all binders Looked Like That when u wore them and NOPE turns out the euphoria is reaaaaal
This doesnt even hurt holy shit. BRAS give me back pain and this whole-ass binder is chill
Dont be a dumbass like me, get a quality binder sooner rather than later
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This. Women generally will universally face similar issues, based on a somewhat universal sense of patriarchy we now have in a global world - but there's too many intersections to say they'll experience it the same way, or with the same intensity in some areas.
The issues facing a poor working class woman in America will be vastly different from those facing a poor working class woman in India, for example, but they are united by certain issues of poverty and womanhood. It's important to me not to oversimplify one way or another.
It's a bad brush to say "the wealthy can't face oppression", but it's also a bad brush to say "all poor women will face the same issues". The reasons working class women's lib is resisted here, is different from why it's resisted in India, or the UK, or Peru, or anywhere.
One of the biggest issues with getting treatment for BPD is that the lie that Borderlines are inherently manipulative still persists, and as a result, our expressions of pain and hurt are taken as attempts to garner sympathy rather than genuine emotional expression.
Thankfully this is a trend that is phasing out with better understanding of BPD, but can you imagine how you'd feel if you told someone something that hurt you badly, got all vulnerable and cried, and they told you that you were just being manipulative and weren't really upset?
The worst part is that this used to be part of the standard of care for BPD. To "challenge" the person on their behavior. In a time you need empathy and are asking for help, you're treated as a hostile manipulator trying to trick everyone.
Fun fact, I know I'm severely traumatized and fucked up, and what happened to me was, in fact, Bad, but I still have severe imposter syndrome around it and can never really admit it, not even to myself. Because how do I handle that, you know?
One of my friends is a Syrian refugee. Went through some shit there being a young Christian girl without a family. Managed to get out of it. Endured things I can't even fathom. She'd tell me all the time that you can't quantify pain, especially against others. That stuck with me.
We talked about trauma a lot. She made it transparent that it didn't matter to her that she went through more than other people. "A cut is a cut" was her favorite saying. "Every cut is dangerous." I think about that a lot on days like this, where I feel like I should get over it.
I think what kills me about the QT/replies to this, is that they're so blinded by their hatred of trans people, they're not even reading. Anyone who's gone through this kind of treatment/violence is invisible to them, just another stepping stone for transphobia.
Even before I came out as trans, I got accosted in bathrooms. The risk for me pre-HRT was always "go to the women's, possibly get assaulted for being a 'man in the women's', go to the men's, get assaulted for being 'an effeminate man' or just being clocked as trans".
There's never been a safe option for me, even when I was closeted. All of this moral panic has only made me more unsafe. There's literal Nazis in my state - open, avowed Nazis - who think it's their DUTY to find and hurt or kill trans people. And GCs scream I'm the bigger threat.
If you think cis women are acceptable collateral damage for hindering or harming trans women in any way, you're not critical of gender, nor are you a feminist. You exist only to enforce the status quo and punish non-conformity to it, no matter the form.
"My feminism is about REAL women, not-" no it's not, because if it was, you would understand the basic tenants of intersectionality, even when they just apply to cis women. You don't. It's not about changing anything - it's about assimilation into patriarchy.
A good example of this is the prison conversation. In the same sentence, you'll see "we have to protect cis women from trans women in prison" and "if they're in prison, they deserve to be there, I have no pity for them." Immediately demonizing all prisoners, cis or trans.
I think we need to eventually have a discussion about how maternal abuse and TERF entitlement to trans bodies overlaps, and how many of them use the language of motherhood and "protection of children" as a way to cloak their abusive behavior, and how society gives both a pass.
For example, the Harry Potter special going on. There's been a few notable TERFs casting JKR in a "betrayed mother" sort of role, as if these cast members are expected to have this dynamic with her. The imposition of motherhood onto them without their input is creepy.
"We know best", "we're older and wiser", "we're just protecting the children", "you owe us/her/women", these are all phrases used to obfuscate abusive behavior under the shroud of "I'm just being maternal and looking out for you". Treating older women as inherently unthreatening.