Thread by @pptsapper

More families need scary family legends in their attics

Ok, historical legends, I mean

#HATM

Spain: transports treasure from the new world to Europe

The Masons: SEND IT ALL BACK

#HATM

National Treasure is premised on people in government keeping a secret

American history is literally the opposite of that, every single time

#HATM

Oh God, I forgot about the gunpowder magically still working after being STUCK IN THE WATER

this whole scene is just ridiculous from a preservation standpoint

#HATM

Yeah, because in 1776 everyone totally knew their revolution would work and definitely not collapse which would put the map in the hands of, well, anyone

#HATM

"one step short of crazy, what do you get?"

"Obsessed"

"Passionate"

SEEN

#HATM

Nick Cage is an outstanding mansplainer

"Your collection is incomplete"

Thanks bruh, real helpful

#HATM

Ughhhhhh this dude that Cage is playing is present at every single academic conference and he is SO ANNOYING

Of the "I have more of a comment than a question" type

#HATM

Using the declaration of grievances listed in the DOI as your rationale to then do some lawbreaking is some specious reasoning, to say the least

#HATM

Preservationists everywhere just died inside

The Declaration would be a pile of dust at this point

#HATM

Not sure what's less believable, the Declaration surviving being rolled up or them being able to drive through DC without being stuck in traffic that has suddenly appeared for absolutely no reason

#HATM

STOP RATTLING THE DOCUMENT OMFG DUDE

#HATM

Wow, Ben Gates' paternalism and chauvinism really have not aged well

This guy is not just at every academic conference, he's in most history departments

and he SUCKS

#HATM

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO not lemons

NO ONE IS TRAINED TO PUT LEMON JUICE ON A 230 YEAR OLD DOCUMENT

UNLESS THEIR BACKGROUND IS IN BEING A TODDLER

#HATM

I love that the whole plot is thrown off because one person in this whole stupid family did the right thing and worked to preserve documents instead of chasing conspiracy theories

#HATM

If you take anything from this movie, it is how in debt we are to those who preserve documents for their historical significance

Not because of some weird belief in hidden treasure

Cheers, preservationists and archivists, we love you

#HATM

I feel for Riley in this movie

He is all normal people talking to history nerds

#HATM

Honestly, the idea that all that brawling could be going on in Philly without the locals joining in is ignoring several hundred years of Philly being ungovernable

Hell, the Brits very much regretted taking Philly in 1777 because of the locals - and logistics

#HATM

"It's the Hudson, sir, nothing is visible"

TRUTH

#HATM

"How do a bunch of guys with hand tools build this?"

"Same way as they built the pyramids"

Yes, good work, Ben: slavery, that same thing that underpinned most of the America of the Declaration, era.

#HATM

The bit about the scrolls from the library of Alexandria still makes me a feel a certain kinda way

#HATM

The Founding Fathers did not in fact believe any of that about government belonging to all the people, but whatever

I'm glad he at least gives everything to museums

#HATM

Ok, snark aside, I remember how much I enjoyed that movie when it came out because it actually had historians doing cool shit and I wanted to be one

#HATM

Little did I know that being a historian is even better than as depicted here - not bc of literal troves of treasure, but because every research project is its own little treasure hunt that comes with rewarding discoveries all on their own

#HATM