Rethinking the concept of arranged marriages!

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Many people regard them as business transactions with little to do with love.

Experts believe that arranged marriages are far more likely to result in long-term affection than passion marriages.
According to research, those in arranged marriages - or those who have had their partner chosen for them by a parent or matchmaker - tend to feel more in love as time passes, whereas those in regular marriages tend to feel less in love as time passes.
And the connection felt by those in arranged marriages is said to be around twice as strong after ten years.
According to relationship experts, this is because arranged marriages are carefully considered, with consideration given to whether potential partners' families, interests, and life goals are compatible.
This means they are more likely to commit for life - and to stick together even when things get tough.

Those who marry for love, on the other hand, are often blinded by passion and thus miss out on important details.
When things get tough, they are more likely to see the situation as a natural end to their romantic fantasy - a sign from fate that something is wrong with the relationship.
With divorce rates in the West at an all-time high and a record number of single-parent households, researchers believe it is time to reconsider the Western approach to love.
Dr. Robert Epstein, a Harvard academic, has studied arranged marriages for eight years, looking at the approaches taken by cultural groups such as Indian, Pakistani, and Orthodox Jewish.
He interviewed over 100 couples in arranged marriages to assess their emotional strength and compared his findings to more than 30 years of research on love in Western and arranged marriages.
His research suggests that feelings of love in love matches begin to fade by half in 18 months, whereas love in arranged marriages grows gradually, eventually surpassing love in unarranged marriages around the five-year mark.
Ten years later, those in arranged marriages typically feel twice as much affection.
Dr. Epstein believes this is because Westerners leave their love lives to chance or fate, frequently confusing love with lust, whereas those in other cultures seek more than just passion.
'The idea is that we should not leave our love lives to chance,' he explained. We plan our education, careers, and finances, but we're still uncomfortable with the idea of planning our love lives. I do not favor arranged marriages, but I believe they can teach us a lot.
'Thought goes into the matching in arranged marriages. Physical attraction is important in the Western world. People must, however, be able to distinguish between lust and love. Strong physical attraction is extremely dangerous and can cause blindness.
'Marriages are easy to get out of in the West. However, in arranged marriages, the commitment is extremely strong. They marry knowing they will not leave, so when things get tough - if they are injured or undergo trauma - they do not flee. It brings them closer together.'
'There is a lot to be said for arranged marriages,' says Francine Kaye, relationship expert and author of The Divorce Doctor. They are adamant about making it work.
'I have seen in Orthodox Jewish arranged marriages that the parents carefully consider compatibility - it is not left to chance.' They research their own characteristics, values, morals, and life goals.
'It should be noted that arranged marriages work because marriage is viewed differently in different cultures. We have a romantic perspective on marriage. Their approach is more practical.
'There is a disadvantage to arranged marriages, however: no matter how pragmatic you are in choosing a partner, there must always be chemistry.'

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