Extreme Programming Explained by @KentBeck is basically the bible for teams that pair program. Its reputation is well-deserved.

Even though helped popularize the idea of pairing, it actually only has two pages on the subject!

You'll probably be surprised by what it says:
1. Pair on all your production code, because
- it keeps you on task
- it encourages you to stick to team practices
- when you get frustrated or stuck, your pair can hop in and take a turn driving, leading to less frustration overall
- it helps come up with & clarify ideas
2. "Pair programming is a dialog between two people simultaneously programming (and analyzing and designing and testing) and trying to program better."

The key here is that both people must be actively trying to improve.

If one of you is phoning it in—that's a problem!
3. If you need to work on an idea or go make a prototype alone, that's totally fine!

Bring ideas back to the team from these solo sessions, not code.

Any code you write alone should be reimplemented afterwards in a pair.
4. Pairing is tiring. Most programmers can only handle pairing for 5-6 hours per day max.

Most XP organizations I've seen ignore this, expecting programmers to pair 100% of the time they are not in meetings.
5. Drink lots of water as you pair. It's good for you and it will force you to take frequent breaks.
6. Rotate pairs often—ideally every couple hours.

I've never seen such frequent rotation in practice. Most teams rotate pairs every day or two.

Some teams rotate only once a week, but that doesn't usually work so well.
7. (It gets a little weird from here on.)

Respect your pair's personal space. Don't sit too close. Someone's cultural background will affect what "too close" means.

Don't be gross. Practice personal hygiene and avoid fragrances so you don't distract people with your smell.
8. If you develop a crush on your pair, stop pairing with that person until your crush has gone away.

If the feelings are mutual, do not act on them. If you want to pursue a relationship with someone on your team, one of you should leave the team first.
9. If a pair makes you uncomfortable, talk to someone safe about it—like a manager or someone in HR.
That's it!

Personally I was surprised that half of this section is spent saying "don't be creepy/gross, don't tolerate creepy/gross pairs, and don't date or hit on your teammates."

But! He's right—any of these will ruin a pairing session and cause a lot of unpleasantness.
I'm currently making a whole course about pair programming with @SimplerMachines.

Follow me @andrewedstrom for updates and more pair programming content.

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