Next, we were taken to the ice bath by the side of the old tennis court.
The cold water feels like a giant fist around you squeezing out all the air.
The only way through was by focusing on each breath and slowing it down to control your fight-or-flight response.
After the ice came more heat.
Hill sprints in the California desert.
But at the top of the hill, we were told to breathe in through our noses only.
Why?
Because breathing through your nose vs your mouth is better for you. It helps:
• reduce exposure to foreign substances
• increase oxygen uptake and circulation
• aid your immune system
• slow down breathing
• improve lung volume
• humidify inhaled air
After a day in the heat, we drove to the beach at night.
8 hours of "surf torture":
• full water immersion
• covering ourselves in sand
• standing in the cold air with wet clothes
And the next lesson:
"Box Breathing":
Inhale to a count of 4 seconds, hold for 4, out for 4, hold for 4.
So we walked into the surf, sat down and let the waves crash over us while practising this technique.
What makes Box Breathing so powerful?
• Helps you deal effectively with stress & anxiety
• Brings balance to your body and mind
• Regulates your natural rhythm
• Leads to emotional control
The next morning we went under the logs to train:
The Warrior Breath.
Sharp inhales through the nose and soft exhales through the mouth or nose.
This is an effective drill to charge your energy stores and clear your mind.
And then we brought it all together for our 'Man down' drills.
• Breathe in through the nose
• Warrior Breath to get energy
• Filling the lungs fully with each breath
• Box Breathing during our short breaks to control our stress response
52 hours of training alongside some of the most elite soldiers on the planet, taught us two powerful lessons:
1) Break up your big goals into small chunks, one breath at a time
2) Breath control is stress control
And next time you wait in line, why not focus on your breath instead of pulling out your phone?
It will energise you and lower your stress level.
What are your favourite breath practices?
Summary: Breath Control
• Nasal breathing
• Shallow breaths kill performance
• Use daily queues to become aware of your breath
• Use the Warrior Breath to energise and clear your mind
• Use Box Breathing to lower stress and anxiety, and for better emotional control
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Jocko Willink is known for discipline, grit, and extreme ownership.
But when it came to parenting, he got some things completely wrong and had to learn the hard way.
Here are 10 powerful lessons from his conversation with his daughter, Rana:
1. The Rock-Carrying Challenge: Teaching Grit and Determination
Jocko set up a challenge: swim across a river, grab the biggest rock you can carry, and bring it back. Most kids chose small stones easy to manage. But his daughter? She went for a massive boulder.
It was so heavy she couldn’t swim with it. Instead, she walked along the riverbed, fully submerged, only surfacing for air. When she finally emerged from the water, gasping, drenched, and victorious, it was clear, she had won by sheer willpower.
👉 Parenting Lesson: Kids don’t build grit when things are easy. Let them struggle, let them problem-solve, and let them win through perseverance.
Several times a week I get asked: “How do you guys do it?”
• 6 kids (1-13yrs)
• Happy marriage
• Both work out daily
• PhD & now CEO of a company
The answer is, there’s no secret. But here's my attempt to give a fuller picture in the hope that it helps other parents.
But first up, the reason I’ve struggled to write about this is that any attempt to ‘reveal’ how we do it, will be incomplete and how things work for us, will not work for you in the same way.
I’m not trying to be prescriptive, as I don’t know your situation. But if any of my/our experience can be of help, this piece has served a purpose.
So life with 6 kids (and no paid help) is most of the time some sort of chaos.
I've listened to 1,000+ hours of his podcasts, read his books and spoken with him.
Here are 12 principles you can apply to become unbeatable:
Who is Jocko Willink?
• Married with 4 kids
• Leadership consultant
• Navy Seal (20-year career)
• Co-owner of Jiu Jitsu academy & gym
• Podcast host and NYT bestselling author
• Co-owner of Origin USA (clothing & supplements)
Now to the principles:
▪️Simple
Jocko was asked how he keeps on track of all his projects. His answer: Excel spreadsheets.
Don’t fall for complicated workflows and fancy software. Simple is best.