Thread by @feministbirther

Some of you may know that for a long time I've worked in birth activism, supporting birthing women, writing about obstetric violence, promoting autonomy at every step of the way. So much of what I see detrans ppl talk about resonates with me in a very similar way.

Pls don't think for a moment that I'm conflating the struggles or the individual pain involved in detransitioning. I'm no Expert. I am expert in helping women heal from medical trauma tho, over nearly 20 yrs now. The parallels are unmistakable bc it happens in similar settings.

Obstetrics is a big machine that dehumanises women, pathologises their normal bodies & functioning, denies their autonomy, demands certain outcomes as a Good Patient & threatens mothers that they submit or their baby will die. It's the 'live son or dead daughter' philosophy.

Every time I see that particular TRA manipulation I'm reminded of how many women I know who have 'chosen' interventions they didn't want, which left lifelong scars they cannot undo, memories of shocking trauma, & also silenced their capacity to describe their pain & experience.

This is why we have the 'horror stories' narrative. The one that goes 'don't ask mothers about birth when you have your first bc they tell you horrific scary stories.' We blame the survivors for talking about their experiences even though we offer no other forum for these women.

We thus lose the chance to tell women what can happen despite their best endeavours once they're in an institution devoted to a particular model of 'care'. Just like detrans ppl are silenced from speaking out on their experiences of hormones & surgery. Don't tell, it's scary!

I also see many women who blame themselves totally for what was done to them & their babies. "I let them" or "I should have said no" or "I said no but they did it anyway so it's my fault." Women are socialised to self blame in situations which evoke shame in us.

But obstetrics like gender intervention is a massive multi billion $$$ machine. How does 1 woman say no to that? I'm sure many detrans ppl have misgivings but the machine rolls on. Some are manipulated. Many are beset with wider issues/trauma. It is never your fault.

Birthing women are deeply vulnerable. They're told their emotions are wrong. Many of us come to birth already carrying the trauma of physical/sexual violence within us. As soon as we are violently assaulted in birth we are going to revisit those agonising moments.

The 'you chose this' myth really grinds my gears. 17yos are not 'choosing' sterility, anorgasmia, brittle bones, pain with orgasm. Women don't 'choose' adhesions, postpartum haemorrhage, fistula, babies sliced by scalpels or horribly wounded by forceps & ventouse.

We're social animals in a world which manufactures our consent to these interventions at every step. Every tv show with a horrible birth normalising the fear of birth when birth is just normal except on rare occasions & we evolved literally to do this one thing.

Just like billion $ companies selling birth drugs women would usually be much healthier without, the same folx are selling kids & teens puberty suppressing agents, artificial hormones then lifelong hormonal dependance if they come off the drugs. Same fucking companies. #profits

So this isn't me saying ho, I know all about detrans. This is me saying I see the emerging similarities & patterns in medical trauma of all kinds. I'm here to tell you there is hope & there is healing, even when the scars on your body are permanent. I have seen women heal.

I like models when I analyse issues women face. It's super tough to reinvent the wheel all the time & I hope that detrans ppl (men & women) can find models which speak to them & aid in their healing. Others have been there before you & returned in pieces yet are now intact.

Given that similar forces, institutions, social beliefs about women & our bodies are at work especially on girls who engage in the medical model of gender, to those birthing women face, I think there is much that these groups can learn from each other.

Another day I'll write about applying the theory of cascade of intervention to gender 'care' because that's also screaming out to be done. I'm happy to chat with anyone who feels this analysis may benefit them. We're all here for those who are seeking to heal. Sending you love.💜