Thread by @jinpeili

CCTV FOLLIES: 11/05
Xi has the magic touch with foreigners edition.

-A charm offensive to boost sagging trade
-When China talks, foreigners take note (and take notes)
-China cares about the human race

(Speaking of universalism, only foreigners in China can get foreign vaccines)

Xi, the expert in everything and anything, is talking imports.
He has a nice touch with foreigners.
He explains things to them.
They listen attentively.

In China, foreigners are picking up the habit of taking notes when VIP members of the CCP talk.
Li Qiang, second in the new lineup, strong but weak compared to Xi, is doing his part to charm foreigners around the world in person and by Zoom.

A meeting about "higher level opening-up"

"Development, cooperation, innovation and sharing"
says Xi Jinping, word-dropping with just a hint of profundity.

1) "Xi Jinping's words travel around the world..."
2) "I agree with all of Chairman Xi Jinping's ideas"

"If you can make it in the China market, you can make it anywhere."
(even Japan)

The news abruptly jumps from the Japanese business outlook to Ukraine, seen from Russia's point of view, of course. Is there any other point of view worthy of the CCTV name?

Another imponderable targeting shot courtesy of the Russian Ministry of Defense

"British spies constructing secret terror army in Ukraine."

CCTV likes this quote from Grayzone so much they didn't even bother to translate it. Just let the masses ponder those indecipherable English words.

And now, the NATO freight unloading scenes you've all been waiting for.
It's time for the "Fanning the Flames" (TM) segment.

This segment includes insights from disgruntled former spy Larry Johnson, best known for spreading a hoax about Michelle Obama using the word "whitey" but hey, whatever works for Chinese purposes.

After all those pallets, and heavy lifting, ready for a palette cleanser, right?
CCTV has got just the thing.
No, it's not the anchor's forced smile, or even the misty hills of a country where only good things happen..

The news is brought to you by Guotai hard liquor, a thoroughly nationalistic firewater. The attractive red bottle containing high proof alcohol blends artfully into the beautiful scenes of the motherland.

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