Thread by @TripeUK

TRIPEDOG 2020
(the contest we'd rather not talk about, thank you).

No episode in the history of the Tripe Marketing Board has cast a cloud quite as dark as that which fell over our infamous #TripeDog contest in 2020.

After a five year absence, excitement was tangible when the news leaked out that the Tripe Marketing Board was re-launching its contest to find the canine face of tripe in 2020.

Board member Katrina Murphy had lobbied intensively for the competition's return, describing it as just the distraction the world needed at that time. Her initial suggestion to host the contest in Iceland was quickly discounted, but the board quickly warmed to the general idea.

Previous winners have included a dachshund belonging to a celebrity radio vicar and a three-legged spaniel (alas, now departed this life) owned by a solicitor from Yorkshire.

https://twitter.com/RevRichardColes/status/1326602775103483904?s=20&t=DGreMvlZupD1V5hPIEJL4A

In 2020, though, the competition was particularly fierce, with some 132 entries received via the TMB’s Twitter account. Honestly, for months it was just dogs, dogs and more dogs.

Following accusations of vote-rigging in previous years, this year the competition was held via a series of online Twitter polls, which are universally acknowledged to be one of the most accurate ways to gauge public opinion, second only to a BBC News vox pop interview.

After an exhaustive series of 30 rounds, seven quarter finals, three semis and the Grand Final, over 10,000 votes had been cast. (To put that in perspective, it was 4,000 more votes than Hilary Benn received when he won the Leeds East byelection in 1999. (Sorry, @hilarybennmp.)

The TMB’s Head of Competitions Mr Sam Frascati said that, though the contest always puts pressure on the Board’s limited resources, it was worth it to see so many wonderful dogs who all aspired to be TripeDog 2020.

He said, “Our Tripe Dog contest is an immense undertaking. We usually have to draft in a couple of interns to manage the whole process, but I’m pleased to say that this year we were able to call in a couple of outside consultants to run it - ...

... I don’t need to mention their names, but they came highly recommended by a central government office we liaise with and have lots of other big contracts with HMGov. All in all, it’s been another resounding success, apart from the repeated accusations of vote-rigging.”

The contest took over two months to run, leading many Twitter followers to complain that the whole thing was dragging on for far too long.

When our chairman was forced to call on the TMB’s auditors to investigate the matter, it was discovered that the original consultancy contract stipulated payment at a daily rate, but had no limit on the duration of the competition.

There was some suspicion - unfortunately, never fully proven - that the contest had been designed to maximise the income of the consultancy firm. Fortunately, the TMB no longer employs this particular firm.

“It was always going to be a grueling fight,” Sir Norman said, “as any successful TripeDog has to show the virtues of tenacity and doggedness if they are to be the public face of the TMB.”

Sadly, there can only be one TripeDog, and in this year, the accolade went to ‘PeePee the Aye Chihuahua’, a feisty (but exceedingly friendly) seven year old from Scotland - pictured here in his Official Winner's Portrait by @RedRaiph.

PeePee won not only the coveted TripeDog trophy, but also a basket of tripe-related goodies and complimentary Tripe Club membership, following a historic decision by the board to accept well-behaved dogs as members.
He continues to perform the role with exemplary aplomb.

#Woof