Thread by @TillyBridges

Welcome to #TransTuesday! Today we’re going to see what it means to self-actualize, talk about self-hating trans people, and touch your heart as we wrap up with THE INTENTIONAL TRANS ALLEGORY OF REAL GENIUS, part 4!

Guess what? You still NEED the context from part 1 about PJ Torokvei and the time this movie was written and filmed in.

https://twitter.com/TillyBridges/status/1597663987642302464

And part 2, where we begin discussion of the movie proper, which establishes how its particular allegory works.

https://twitter.com/TillyBridges/status/1600205529770786816

And part 3, where you really get to see some of the genius (pun probably intended\, let's be honest) stuff the allegory is telling you!

https://twitter.com/TillyBridges/status/1602738188950257664

46:04 - Despite not being understood by his parents, Mitch wants to go home because when he came the closest he’s ever been to being happy, he got yelled at for it and saw a man get made fun of for wearing makeup.

He’s scared. He just wants to go back to the way things were, when he had no idea you could be anything other than what society told you that you were, because this way is difficult and painful.

Remember Neo in the first MATRIX? “Why is this happening to me? What’d I do? I’m nobody. I didn’t do anything. I’m going to die.” Nobody ASKS to be trans, it’s foisted upon us by genetics or fate or the universe or whatever deities you believe in.

And again, can’t tell you how many trans people go through that. Why did I have to be trans? I don’t want to be trans! This is scary and hard and society will hate me. Why can’t I just be “normal?”

47:15 - Mitch’s call was recorded by ultra conformo Kent, and he’s publicly humiliated for being a MAN WHO HAS FEELINGS. His mom tells him he has to be “her little soldier” and his dad says he hopes nobody “saw him crying.” It’s toxic masculinity allllll over.

JUST GO CONFORM AND BE A MAN, MITCH. SUCK IT UP. STOP HAVING FEELINGS AND BEING ANYTHING OTHER THAN WHAT SOCIETY SAYS A MAN CAN BE.

48:27 - Chris catches Mitch packing to leave, and tells him that if he does he’ll “miss the fun.” If Mitch gives up on accepting his true self, he will never find the trans joy that exists on the other side.

48:40 - Mitch says he needed Chris’ help and all Chris wanted to do was party. Chris says he was just trying to help him relax (about society’s cis binary rules, so he can fully explore his true identity).

48:55 - Mitch thought Pacific Tech would be different, but it’s the same as high school. They’re both social hierarchies with Mitch at the bottom for NOT CONFORMING. Even when pretending to be a cis guy, I was bullied and shunned through all of school.

Because even in that costume I didn’t know how to wear, playing a part I didn’t know how to play, trying to be someone I wasn’t… I wasn’t who society said a man was (someone I could never be). And the bullies see that, and use it against you.

49:10 - Chris explains how he used to be just like Mitch, and his mother dressed him the same way. Aka Chris had all the same “male” expectations laid upon him by the cis people in his life.

49:24 - One night Chris had a vision - Hollyfeld. In the closet. And he talked to him, and found out Hollyfeld used to be where Chris is now. But he buckled under the pressure, because there was nothing more to his life than what society expected of him.

Hollyfeld didn’t see that there was more to life than living up to society’s false expectations. And that by doing so he was HURTING OTHER PEOPLE (like him, other trans people) BECAUSE HE KEPT HIMSELF IN THE CLOSET.

And this is what changed Chris, and why he transitioned and is the person he is now. He didn’t want to end up that way. And Chris tells Mitch he’s going to end up the same way if he doesn’t wake up and choose a better life. I fuckin’ told you Hollyfeld was Mitch’s future self!

Also please note I don’t think this movie is saying that if you’re trans you HAVE to come out. As a trans woman in the 80s who didn’t come out for another two decades, PJ was intimately aware of how dangerous and difficult it can be.

But this is ALSO acknowledging that the more of us who stay in the closet, the less of us it appears there are. Which means less people see us, learn about us, are inspired by us to come out for themselves. And the more of us that come out can increase societal acceptance.

It’s definitely a double-edged sword. Coming out puts us in danger, but staying in the closet makes the entire trans community’s advancement more difficult. No one MUST come out, but for those of us who it’s (relatively) safe for, we do have some obligation to each other.

But I also think this is PJ working through the issue herself, trying to convince HERSELF to come out. She knew it would not only help her, but other trans people. But society doesn’t let coming out be something that exists only on our own terms, does it?

55:09 - Hathaway says Chris is no longer of any use to him, and he won’t allow him to graduate. Chris says he’ll go to the dean and tell him about his work on the laser, which should merit a degree on its own. Hathaway reminds him… “who’s he going to believe, you or me?”

Who will society believe, the weirdo non-conformist who says they’re a woman despite having mismatched secondary sexual characteristics, or the entire cis white man-led history saying we are all defined by our genitals at birth?

57:48 - During his plans to get back at Hathaway, Chris pretends to be conforming to gain Hathaway’s trust/acceptance. This is different than him throwing away the popcorn, because he’s not actually trying to appease anyone here.

58:05 - You can see he’s still got signs of his true self there with the slippers. He’s letting Hathaway know he can play the game if he has to, but his spirit and will can’t be crushed.

58:36 - As Chris and Mitch work on not being entirely shunned by society, Hollyfeld is still there behind them, looming in the closet, reminding them of what awaits them if they actually conform and reject their truth.

1:00:28 - Mitch is dreaming… about being shoved in a mailbox (again) by men who are mad he won’t conform. The closer we get to actualizing, the scarier it gets to think about how the people in our lives are going to react.

From the letter we discussed in part 1, we know PJ clearly had these same well-founded fears. Which absolutely came to pass the second she came out.

1:02:00 - They meet Hollyfeld, who’s been watching them. He’s used his skills to enter a contest over a million times, but it’s not breaking the rules. “They set up the rules, and I’ve come to realize I have certain materialistic needs.”

Going back to PJ’s letter again, it’s bullshit to have to “live as a woman” by society’s rigid definition of what that is, just to access the medical care we need. But if that’s what we have to do to fool them into thinking we’re conformos who’ll uphold the gender binary, okay.

I don’t think there’s anywhere in the US that still has that backward-ass requirement for accessing trans healthcare, but in the time this movie was written and made it absolutely was. It was mentioned right in that letter we keep talking about.

In any case, us having to conform to crap like that just to get the care we need has some bad bad consequences, which we’ll get to shortly.

1:02:32 - Hollyfeld, for no real reason, says Mitch is going to grow five inches in the next year. Which makes no sense until you remember that earlier Chris made a joke about how of course Mitch wasn’t looking for Hollyfeld’s clothes in the closet…

…because Hollyfeld was much bigger and they wouldn’t fit. If Mitch stays on this path in a year he will have grown into the man in the closet. Again, I TOLD YOU HOLLYFELD WAS MITCH’S FUTURE. Ahem.

1:03:05 - Let us just pretend Sherry did not say she was waiting three years (since Mitch was TWELVE??) to be “old enough” to try and seduce? HE IS FIFTEEN great googly moogly. This is… very very cringe.

But note that Sherry, the only other woman besides Jordan in the movie, wants Mitch. She previously liked Chris and all the other "smart people" in the vast minority. Remember this for when we get to the end.

1:04:29 - Mitch didn’t want to sex her up. So he goes to… Jordan? Who he DOES want to sex up but she is 19 and he is 15 yiiiiiikes more cringe.

The point, though, is that here Mitch is more comfortable with a gender non-conforming woman. He’s more comfortable with her now than he’s ever been. Again, remember this when we get to the end. Is this kiss, like in THE MATRIX, one of self-acceptance? Maybe!

1:17:05 - Chris and Mitch have conformed/helped Hathaway achieve his goals that will bring him more power and wealth. Hollyfeld lets them know that’s going to be used to hurt other people, just like his conforming and forcing himself into the closet was used to hurt others.

By getting Hathaway’s approval, they have aided him in hurting others in the future. That was something they never intended. They’d been thinking only about making life easier for themselves.

By conforming to what society wants (“living as a woman” for a year before you can get access to care), even to get something we NEED, WE ARE HURTING OTHERS. Because that reinforces that it’s the way it should be done.

And then other trans people who need access to that care will have to go through the same thing, and it could (and likely will) hurt them, too.

And I don’t think this is saying trans people back in the 80s shouldn’t have done what they needed to do to get the medical care they needed. The point is that THE SYSTEM ITSELF IS HARMFUL AND NEEDS TO CHANGE. We shouldn’t have to hurt others to help ourselves.

1:21:01 - Even Kent the conformo is surprised to learn that working to help the system, in order to get its rewards, has hurt others. He didn’t realize that just doing what was asked of him could affect others. JUST UPHOLDING THE CIS BINARY HURTS EVERYONE, CIS PEOPLE INCLUDED.

1:23:-47 - When they get the fake IDs, Chris: “Mine looks like him and his looks like me.” Another nod for you that, hey, they’re alike. They’re both trans people.

1:32:05 - We see mega-conformo Kent is wearing a dickie. Even HIS conforming wasn’t the true him, it was literally a COSTUME he put on because it’s what was expected of him.

Again, the false binary cis status quo ALSO HURTS CIS PEOPLE and forces you to wear a costume and perform your gender a certain way. It’s toxic masculinity again. It’s “boys don’t cry.” It’s “men can only display anger and lust.” And on and on.

There’s also possibly a read on Kent as a self-hating trans person, someone who hid their own transness and became a vocal transphobe and oppressed trans people to show how “not trans they really are.” Much more common to see in the ‘80s and before, though it still happens today.

During all the subterfuge with the plane and the laser, this is a metaphor for Mitch and Chris finding a way to CHANGE THE SYSTEM SO NOBODY GETS HURT.

1:33:50 - Confirming what I surmised about Gene before, here's your proof that he is in fact trans like Chris and Mitch, as evidenced by their matching bunny slippers. They do not conform IN THE SAME WAY. Gene may only show a little of it now, but it’s there.

1:37:28 - Kent gets his first hint of what’s to come, aka the thing that inconveniences Hathaway has returned…

1:38:29 - …and it carries him right to Chris and Mitch. I think this ABSOLUTELY increases the read on Kent as a self-hating trans person hiding their transness. Look how Mitch and Chris were worried about him as he approached the house, and helped him when he needed it.

As soon as Kent cast off the shell of the person he was pretending to be, even if he hadn’t yet figured out who he IS, they were there to literally pick him up and help carry the weight. Just like Chris did for Mitch when they first met (not literally in that case, tho).

1:40:06 - Hollyfeld returns. LOOK AT HIM. By helping others not conform, it’s helped HIM break out of his own conformity and performance of the cis binary. Mitch’s future is now one of nonconformity. Mitch will transition, and find joy. He will be out of the closet and free.

1:41:34 - Hollyfeld says it’s “getting weird around here.” Chris: “Absolutely.” Jordan: “I didn’t notice.” Mitch: “I like it.” Jordan didn’t notice because she’s always been “weird.” Chris has embraced it. And so has Mitch/Hollyfeld.

And here’s why I told you to pay attention to the two women. My read is that Jordan is representative of Mitch’s first steps to figuring out who he is: gender nonconformity. And he is WITH HER NOW. HE IS GENDER NONCONFORMING.

We know Sherry, the ARCH feminine (in this movie) always goes with the fully out and self-accepted trans person. She wanted Chris, she wanted Mitch but MITCH WASN’T READY.

But Hollyfeld, Mitch’s future, IS. And that’s why SHERRY IS WITH HOLLYFELD here at the end. Mitch’s future is attaining full self-actualization as the woman he truly is.

I do NOT believe the movie is saying you’re not a woman if you’re not high femme. I think it was just made in the ‘80s and uses broad archetypes of girly-girls and tomboys to make its point about where Mitch got to, and where he’ll end up, by staying out of the closet.

1:41:38 - LOOK AT THE HAPPINESS ACCEPTING TRANS JOY BRINGS TO *EVERYONE* when we don’t let the “inconvenience” of our existence to cis society be more important than living our lives as our authentic selves.

Remember that PJ was deeply closeted when this was written. It would be TWENTY YEARS before she felt she could come out to the world, and once she did it seemingly cost her her career and quite possibly her life.

Given that, I see REAL GENIUS almost as PJ’s message not to just every other trans person out there, but to herself. She was examining what being trans meant to her, to the world, and trying to figure out what to do about it. I’m so glad she finally felt able to be herself.

Reject conformity. Reject the cisgender binary matrix. Find and be your true self. And fix the system so nobody else gets hurt along the way. This is the way to joy. For all of us.

This's the message in REAL GENIUS. Self-acceptance. Help those who come after. Make the world better for everyone. It’s beautiful.

Thank you PJ, for your heart and courage. I’m so sad you didn’t get to see more of the world change for the better.

Tilly Bridges, end transmission