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Jezzica Morgan ; 🏴‍☠️

@porpster

Dec 25

I could tell a drunken Christmas Eve story.. It's from years ago.. but there ain't no punchline. It's just an experience I had on Christmas Eve, gettin' drunk in a bar with lonely folks like me.. and shit happened. Lot of shit. 🤣

It was before my second marriage, after I got divorced the first time.

I walked down the hill to my local bar. It was a slow night at the Albert. I sat there for hours without much fun and then a couple of folks walked in, loudly. We started talkin' and drinkin' and hit it off.

After a couple more hours of that, we three were having a blast.. And then, a party couple showed up, and they were coked up up.

And we made friends with them, too.

Read 11 tweets

Jezzica Morgan ; 🏴‍☠️

@porpster

Dec 25

Welp, a pipe burst under this old house tonight, and I had to turn off the main valve. But I have electricity and gas at least. The furnace is broken, but I have space heaters and an electric blanket.. and food and beer and the internet. That's good enough for me. 🍻

The pipes to the bathtub froze last night, and I had to wash my hair in the kitchen sink. I needed to spend today trying to figure out a way to thaw the pipes. But I slept under my electric blanket all day and then I heard the water start flowing again. 5 mins later. Pop.

I'd like to believe that my dad wouldn't have let the pipes freeze. But this is the first time it's been this cold without a working furnace, and if the furnace worked, the pipes wouldn't have frozen. But he would have definitely found a way to thaw them today.. oh well.

Read 4 tweets

Jezzica Morgan ; 🏴‍☠️

@porpster

Dec 23

Iko, iko
Iko iko an day
Jockomo feeno ah nan day
Jockomo feena nay 🎤

My spyboy tell your spyboy
Sittin' on the bayou
My spyboy told your spyboy
"I'm gon' set your tail on fire" 🎤

Talkin' 'bout hey now (Hey now)
Hey now (Hey now)
Iko iko an day (Oh)
Jockomo feeno ah nan day
Jockomo feena nay 🎤

My marraine told your marraine
Sittin' on the Bayou
My marraine told your parraine
"I'm gon' set your thing on fire" 🎤

Read 8 tweets

Jezzica Morgan ; 🏴‍☠️

@porpster

Dec 23

https://twitter.com/SanFranSam_54/status/1606178173388869632

And if you don't expound in 15 mins, I'm blocking you

https://twitter.com/SanFranSam_54/status/1606178173388869632

@SanFranSam_54

You have fewer than 10 mins left @SanFranSam_54

@SanFranSam_54

@SanFranSam_54 I have a stop watch running.

Read 6 tweets

Jezzica Morgan ; 🏴‍☠️

@porpster

Dec 23

You talk too much
You worry me to death
You talk too much
You even worry my pet

You just talk
Talk too much 🎤💜

You talk about people
That you don't know
You talk about people
Wherever you go
You just talk
Talk too much 🎤

You talk about people
That you've never seen
You talk about people
You can make me scream

You just talk
You talk too much

You talk too much
You worry me to death
You talk too much
You even worry my pet 🎤

Read 4 tweets

Jezzica Morgan ; 🏴‍☠️

@porpster

Dec 23

The only people who reply to my Tweets have a problem with it, or they want to suck my toes.

Welcome to Twitter. It's like this for everyone. Toe suckers or haters.

No in-between.

And here's how to rewrite this using my DBT skills, "the only people who reply to my Tweets have a problem with it, or they want to suck my toes."

Turns into

"Several people who have replied to my Tweets have a problem with it, or several others want to suck my toes."

Read 4 tweets

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Jezzica Morgan ; 🏴‍☠️

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Jezzica Morgan ; 🏴‍☠️

Jezzica Morgan ; 🏴‍☠️

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