Two names I was called often, as undiagnosed AuDHDer growing up were “rebellious” & “weird” - you know I have a thing for reclaiming the insults that have been used against me, so when I was asked if I wanted to participate in Weird Pride day, my answer was an enthusiastic, yes!
“This is a day for people to embrace their weirdness, and reject the stigma associated with being weird. To publicly express pride in the things that make us weird, and to celebrate the diversity of humankind.
Why should people be proud of weirdness?
As with any ‘pride’ event, the issue is really with refusal to be ashamed —which is the opposite of pride — rather than necessarily being actively proud.
Most of us are ‘weird’ in some ways, because humans vary so much, in so many ways. It’s not normal to be average in every way!
So what makes you weird? Have you ever been made to feel bad about it? Have you made other people feel bad about being weird? If so, why?
Have you learned to be okay with your peculiarities? What did it take? What has it meant for you?
Have you learned how to live with other people’s eccentricities? Did it make life easier and richer in the long run?
What have you learned about when it’s not okay to be weird, or how to make it okay when it’s difficult? How do you negotiate other people’s boundaries while staying true to yourself?”
Sounds like it could get weird, I’M IN!!! Are YOU???
Ever since I cam out trans in the summer of 2020, I’ve had a group of cishet nonAutistic parents complaining about how I “shouldn’t talk about” LGBTQIA2+ issues “on an autism page”.
They have a few constant arguments why they feel I shouldn’t talk about these issues:
The first claim they made is about “social contagion” - they claimed that my Autistic readers “are vulnerable and may be confused” or “can’t understand” this type of content.
They claim I am “tricking vulnerable” Autistics into “thinking they’re Queer”.
The second complaint I see from this group is they believe that being trans/Queer & being Autistic “are not connected”.
When Autistic People are more likely to be members of the LGBTQIA2+ community, these parents oppose taking about the intersectional nature of these identities.
Notice how the antiTrans people will say “transgenderism” instead of “Trans People”.
This is to dehumanize us, by creating a category for “trans behavior” implying no Trans People exist, only people who “engage in” or “practice” “transgender behavior” or “transgenderism”.
This is similar to trans and other forms of Queer medicalism that occurred in the 1900s-1970s, where being Queer was considered a mental defect, treated with gay conversion “therapy” (which didn’t work & only caused PTSD, trauma, & su!c!des).
They dehumanized Queer People by separating our behaviors from our personhood, and labeled anything “Queer” as “undesirable behavior” that needed to be extinguished (similar to how society currently does with most forms of NeuroDivergence today).
I’m really bothered by something that I’ve seen happening for years on my page…
On my FB page, I regularly share posts from other Autistic People, because I don’t want my voice or opinions to be the only ones featured there.
Often, when I share something from another page (& sometimes even when I share my own experience), someone will come & pick apart the language people use, critiquing how people describe their own experiences, saying things like “I wouldn’t describe it that way” etc.
My thoughts: “STAKEHOLDERS” - many thoughts about the use of that word.
1. sounds like they see us as “business” 👀
2. It’s interesting to know what non-Autistic “stakeholders” think, because it shows how out of touch they are with the majority of those they claim to serve.
3. NonAutistic people should step aside, and listen to Autistics, vs talking over us.
What do YOU prefer? If you have the energy, why?
This number is different every time I see it but I can always count on what MOST Autistic People I know prefer (“Autistic” not “with autism”).
Much like when a Queer or trans person stays in the closet because they don’t feel safe, NeuroDivergent masking, or camouflaging, is defined as when a NeuroDivergent Person consciously, or subconsciously, masks or hides, their Divergent traits, in order to blend in.
We do it to keep ourselves safe. We do it because the world around us can be very hostile, and blending in is self-defense.
However… blending in can also feel like a slow death, putting yourself aside to pacify the expectations of other people, making yourself small, ignoring us our own wants and needs.
I recently saw a post where diagnosed Autistics were beating downs & shaming self-identified Autistic & NeuroDivergent People.
That will never fly in my presence for multiple reasons… mainly that diagnosis is something that is out of reach for many NeuroDivergents because:
1. The criteria was based on cis, white, boys… so if that’s not you, you are less likely to be properly identified/may be misdiagnosed due to poor understanding of multiply marginalized Autistic People.
2. If we come from poverty, our NeuroDivergent traits may have been blamed on “behavioral problems” growing up - and our NeuroTypes may have been dismissed/ignored.
My ND traits were blamed on me having a poor, single, mother.