Thread by @Elvis_Localman

LUHYA CULTURAL MARRIAGES PROCEDURE & ORDER OF EVENTS

A significant number of Luhyas still follow the traditional marriage route rather than the “civilised” route called wedding.

The very first step is INTRODUCTION.

Introduction is when the man goes with a group of his…

…fellow young men and at least a lady in the company (mostly the sister) to introduce himself. During the introduction, the main man who will be looking for a hand in marriage in the woman’s home will not talk or will talk very little, he will instead have a spokesman and an…

…assistant whom he will be seated in between them. (The essence if the lady in the company is mostly to act as a messenger in future if the marriage request is approved so that whenever there is an issue within his brother’s marriage and the wife leaves, she is the one who…

…will be sent to the brother’s wife home to negotiate for the coming back of the brother’s wife since she knows the home). During introduction, it’s supposed to be kept straight, short and clear by the spokesman who will explain why there is presence of men in the girl’s home…

…,if you have a weak spokesman, you are doomed if you meet cultured wazees who can make you guys sweat with technical cultural questions. When the spokesman states the intentions of the men presence in the lady’s home, they will be expecting an answer, either yes or no, if its..

…it’s a yes from the girl’s elders, the same elders will now ask what next from the man’s side. This answer is not to be answered by the young men, the young men will then state they will pass on the feedback to their elders back in the village for an update of what next.

…

…The second stage is dowry negotiations, in some cultures the lady’s people will visit the man’s home instead of the man’s people visiting the woman’s home for dowry negotiations, if the dowry is agreed on, it will be taken to the woman’s home, if they agreed on cows, they…

…will be taken there by the elders from the man’s side. In some sub-Luhya cultures the woman’s people will come for the cows instead like the Tachoni or Tiriki people. The stick 🦯 used to drive the dowry cows/livestock ought to be returned back to the man’s home and be kept…

…safe. (I forgot to mention above that the man asking a hand in marriage during introduction is not supposed to eat chicken in the girl’s home until something called “kunawa or osava” has taken place in the mother in-law’s house, until then, that is not your mother in law, by…

…bad luck God forbid your “wife” dies and kunawa has not taken place, you will leave the body in the morgue first, go do the kunawa before you can proceed to burry your wife’s body).

Remember during introduction if the girl’s parents deem you fit to live with their daughter…

…and bless you, you are free to live with their daughter under one roof.

When dowry negotiations are done and agreed on, it will be paid and officially she becomes your wife, then “Kunawa” will follow next.

Luhyas and Luos share a lot of cultural practices especially in…

…marriages. Weddings are modern day marriages that seem to have lost direction, a lot of people are marrying via weddings courtesy of peer pressure. In my own opinion, the traditional marriages seemed to last longer than the modern day weddings which have brought about… twitter.com/i/web/status/1…

…and peer pressure. I think following the traditional way of marriage is better as there were clearly laid foundations in each and every stage of what was happening. The wazees of kitambo were not educated but were very clever in their dealings

Share your #cultures too.

Enjoy