notting hill #namkook au where famous singer jungkook is a new ck ambassador & namjoon works at a small bookshop in myeongdong. one rainy day jk stumbles into the bookshop to hide from paparazzi. with jk's face & abs on billboards everywhere it's evident nj is a little starstruck 
jungkook's polite, quiet, ducking his head down as he looks at a few travel books. namjoon must be dreaming or maybe he's just seen the ck pics so many times that he's dreaming jk up. and yet, there jk is. he grabs a travel book, placing it at the cash desk with a small bow.
namjoon can only blink at him and jungkook stares owlishly back.
"that's a buy one get one half price book," nj explains after a moment. "we have some cool europe books if you're interested."
jk just shakes his head, tapping onto the jeju book. "just this one please."
"that's a buy one get one half price book," nj explains after a moment. "we have some cool europe books if you're interested."
jk just shakes his head, tapping onto the jeju book. "just this one please."
there's only 1 other customer in the shop. an old man that smells of moth balls walks up to them, taking out a stained small notebook. "can i have an autograph?" he asks, staring at the singer unabashedly. jk nods, scribbling something down hurriedly before turning back to nj.
the man doesn't even say thank you as he leaves, walking into a large pile of books that falls to the floor. that will be a pain to clear up after.
"it's on the house," nj says, pushing the book across the desk.
the singer shakes his head, frowning. "i can pay."
"it's on the house," nj says, pushing the book across the desk.
the singer shakes his head, frowning. "i can pay."
he puts the amount down & nj feels like jelly as he accepts the amount. their fingers touch for a moment, jk is soft, delicate - everything nj thought he would be.
and then jungkook leaves, staring back at nj for a moment before taking the book and hurrying down the street.
and then jungkook leaves, staring back at nj for a moment before taking the book and hurrying down the street.
the bell chimes as the door closes and namjoon stands there, frozen.
he moves to begin picking up the books now on the floor, jungkook's face not leaving his mind.
hoseok his business partnet appears a few minutes later, carrying the americano he'd gone to collect.
he moves to begin picking up the books now on the floor, jungkook's face not leaving his mind.
hoseok his business partnet appears a few minutes later, carrying the americano he'd gone to collect.
"you won't believe who was just here." namjoon starts, still not even sure if he had imagined it all.
hoseok looks up in alert, slurping at his coffee. "who?" he perks up, staring up and down the street through the window.
jungkook flashes again in nj's mind. soft, quiet.
hoseok looks up in alert, slurping at his coffee. "who?" he perks up, staring up and down the street through the window.
jungkook flashes again in nj's mind. soft, quiet.
is it selfish of namjoon to keep that moment - no matter how humiliating or awkward it was - between him and jungkook only?
jk is so famous - his songs play constantly wherever you go, and he's the face of so many brands. but jk just then looked every bit just a normal guy.
jk is so famous - his songs play constantly wherever you go, and he's the face of so many brands. but jk just then looked every bit just a normal guy.
"no one." namjoon says after a moment. "it was just my imagination, sorry."
hoseok only nods. "wouldn't it be amazing though, if someone famous came into our shop? if only."
namjoon only nods. seeing jungkook was like a once in a lifetime moment, like a needle in a haystack.
hoseok only nods. "wouldn't it be amazing though, if someone famous came into our shop? if only."
namjoon only nods. seeing jungkook was like a once in a lifetime moment, like a needle in a haystack.
it wouldn't happen again. so namjoon keeps the interaction to himself, allowing it to warm up his insides as the day slowly passes by.
imagine his surprise when - during his half hour lunch - nj walks into jungkook again, this time spilling matcha tea all over jk's white top.
imagine his surprise when - during his half hour lunch - nj walks into jungkook again, this time spilling matcha tea all over jk's white top.
continue?
"shit," namjoon gulps, stepping backwards in shock. jungkook can only gape down at himself, his white shirt now covered green.
the singer sighs, looking up at nj with a frown as he tries to wipe himself.
"please-" nj stutters. "let me help?"
"i think you've done enough."
the singer sighs, looking up at nj with a frown as he tries to wipe himself.
"please-" nj stutters. "let me help?"
"i think you've done enough."
namjoon gulps, glancing around the busy street to see if anyone's noticed the singer's presence. he's safe for now it seems.
"look," he passes jungkook a tissue which the singer accepts haughtily. "my place is just round the block, you can clean up - i'll lend you a shirt?"
"look," he passes jungkook a tissue which the singer accepts haughtily. "my place is just round the block, you can clean up - i'll lend you a shirt?"
jungkook bites his lips, looking cute. "just around the block?" he asks suspiciously. "how close are we talking?"
namjoon turns, pointing down the street. "you see that coffee bean cafe just there? my place is just a few doors down, on the 2nd floor."
jk nods, shrugging. "ok."
namjoon turns, pointing down the street. "you see that coffee bean cafe just there? my place is just a few doors down, on the 2nd floor."
jk nods, shrugging. "ok."
for a moment he stands there, frozen. "sorry?"
jungkook stares at him. "you said i could wash up at your place? i can't walk around with matcha all over me."
"right." nj nods, half convinced he must have banged his head earlier. how is this possible? "of course. follow me."
jungkook stares at him. "you said i could wash up at your place? i can't walk around with matcha all over me."
"right." nj nods, half convinced he must have banged his head earlier. how is this possible? "of course. follow me."
it's surreal to have the singer jjk following him home, but that's what is really happening. nj glances to his left to really make sure jk's next to him. he's even more beautiful in person. they pass by a ck advert and jk blushes, hurrying past it. nj tries not to look- he fails.
it's only when they go through the doors & up the stairs (the lift is broken again) that nj remembers his place is a complete mess.
"um." nj hastily invites jk in, taking off their shoes. "just - uh hang on a sec."
nj races to the kitchen, throwing dishes in the sink.
"um." nj hastily invites jk in, taking off their shoes. "just - uh hang on a sec."
nj races to the kitchen, throwing dishes in the sink.
he picks up dirty clothes, shoves books onto his table. when it looks slightly better he pokes his head round the door. jk looks like a lost bunny, his arms folded against his chest, his shirt still soggy with matcha.
"you can come in sorry... i wasn't expecting company."
"you can come in sorry... i wasn't expecting company."
he certainly wasn't expect jk to enter his home that's for sure.
"i don't mind mess, it's fine." jk says with a shrug, as if he isn't korea's biggest star. "can you show me where the bathroom is, please."
nj tries to not think about the ck ad. abs. belly button. ck underwear.
"i don't mind mess, it's fine." jk says with a shrug, as if he isn't korea's biggest star. "can you show me where the bathroom is, please."
nj tries to not think about the ck ad. abs. belly button. ck underwear.
"let me just get you a change of clothes."
but what kind of clothes does he have that would be fit for jk? the singer can't be wearing any of his tatty shorts or threadbare tops! nj hunts for 5 mins, finally settling on a black tshirt & grey joggers.
but what kind of clothes does he have that would be fit for jk? the singer can't be wearing any of his tatty shorts or threadbare tops! nj hunts for 5 mins, finally settling on a black tshirt & grey joggers.
when jk enters the bathroom and nj hears the tap running he groans, slapping himself on the head. what is he doing? jjk is in his bathroom! is he going crazy?
he tries to tidy up more, making the singer a cup of barley tea since it's a little cold outside.
he tries to tidy up more, making the singer a cup of barley tea since it's a little cold outside.
when jk comes out of the bathroom nj has to blink a few times. the clothes are baggy, his tattoos on full display, his hair now a lot curlier & windswept than before. he looks soft, cuddly. nj feels like he's drifted off into a dream.
"would you like something to eat?" nj clears his throat.
jk looks at him for a moment before slowly shaking his head. "no."
"nothing small?" he opens his fridge to see what he has. "i have kimchi? yakult?"
"no."
"what about," nj pulls out a jar. "apricots soaked in honey?"
jk looks at him for a moment before slowly shaking his head. "no."
"nothing small?" he opens his fridge to see what he has. "i have kimchi? yakult?"
"no."
"what about," nj pulls out a jar. "apricots soaked in honey?"
jk stares at the jar. "no."
"you sure? they're yours if you want." nj needs to stop talking but when he's nervous he rambles. and jjk makes him Very Nervous.
"do you... uh always say no to everything?"
jk pauses, there's a slight smile on his lips. beautiful soft lips. "no."
"you sure? they're yours if you want." nj needs to stop talking but when he's nervous he rambles. and jjk makes him Very Nervous.
"do you... uh always say no to everything?"
jk pauses, there's a slight smile on his lips. beautiful soft lips. "no."
"i better go," jk says after a pause, tucking some hair behind his ear. "thanks for your... help."
"i'm so sorry again," nj coughs, jk smiles again and nj feels his heart sing. "but can i just say... since you um well you'll probably never come back to the shop. you're amazing."
"i'm so sorry again," nj coughs, jk smiles again and nj feels his heart sing. "but can i just say... since you um well you'll probably never come back to the shop. you're amazing."
jk breaks out a dazzling smile. "thanks."
"yeah well, my pleasure." nj smiles.
he follows jk to the door, opening it for him. "it was lovely meeting you." he says, staring at jk. "surreal, but nice."
"right." jk nods, waving goodbye before he's out the door. surreal but nice?!
"yeah well, my pleasure." nj smiles.
he follows jk to the door, opening it for him. "it was lovely meeting you." he says, staring at jk. "surreal, but nice."
"right." jk nods, waving goodbye before he's out the door. surreal but nice?!
nj groans once again, wishing he could bang his head against a wall. why is he so embarrassing?
he turns to go back into the kitchen, to tidy a few more things. he might as well try and get used to a mundane life again now.
a few seconds pass when the doorbell rings.
he turns to go back into the kitchen, to tidy a few more things. he might as well try and get used to a mundane life again now.
a few seconds pass when the doorbell rings.
nj has to blink 20 times when he sees jk standing there. nj tries not to gape. why is he back? what is this? a romcom?
"hi um," jk smiles shy. "i forgot my bag? sorry."
"oh right." of course it was only something like that. still- nj lets jk in again, hurrying to get it.
"hi um," jk smiles shy. "i forgot my bag? sorry."
"oh right." of course it was only something like that. still- nj lets jk in again, hurrying to get it.
he passes jk his bag, stiff. they stare at each other. is nj dreaming? why does he feel some sort of pull towards jk? he smiles politely at jk, waiting for the singer to leave.
instead jk leans forwards, his eyes wide & hopeful as he stands on his tiptoes, kissing nj on the lips
instead jk leans forwards, his eyes wide & hopeful as he stands on his tiptoes, kissing nj on the lips
surely he's dreaming? nj freezes, feeling jk's soft, plump lips on his own. nope, definitely not dreaming. he feels jks tongue, and hears the singer sigh a little as their lips move against each other.
"you can touch me, you know." jk whispers against his lips, closing his eyes.
"you can touch me, you know." jk whispers against his lips, closing his eyes.
"right," nj says, not moving a muscle. jk kisses him again softly, all but whining against his lips.
"that means you can put your hands on me, like this." he tries not to jump when jk grabs his hands, moving them until they're placed around jk's waist.
"fantastic," nj says.
"that means you can put your hands on me, like this." he tries not to jump when jk grabs his hands, moving them until they're placed around jk's waist.
"fantastic," nj says.
https://twitter.com/jaffakoo/status/1641051878401163269?t=I87oGVriW4EVJdfDRkGbmQ&s=19start of the thread🏃🫡
when it's clear njs hands won't stray from his waist, jk wraps his hands around njs neck, pulling him closer to deepen the kiss.
namjoon tries not to freak out, still feeling like jks waist is hot coal that he can't touch. but ... he might as well enjoy this moment right?
namjoon tries not to freak out, still feeling like jks waist is hot coal that he can't touch. but ... he might as well enjoy this moment right?
nj allows himself to close his eyes, getting lost in the way jk feels against him, the suppleness of his lips, the dip of his waist.
he feels jk smile against his lip, clearly liking the way njs hold on his waist tightens & firms. he's making out with jjk - everything is great.
he feels jk smile against his lip, clearly liking the way njs hold on his waist tightens & firms. he's making out with jjk - everything is great.
the kiss seems to last forever or maybe it's seconds. either way, it feels natural to hold jk like this, to kiss him, to breathe in his little noises as the singer messes with the hair at nj's nape.
he can't help but shiver as they part, opening his eyes to stare at jk. "wow."
he can't help but shiver as they part, opening his eyes to stare at jk. "wow."
jungkook's eyes flutter open, his lashes long. "wow?" he has a bunny smile & one sweet dimple that blossoms aganinst his cheek.
nj only nods, unable to move from his hold around jks waist. "wow." he says again. "i- i'm sorry about the surreal but nice comment. it was way nicer."
nj only nods, unable to move from his hold around jks waist. "wow." he says again. "i- i'm sorry about the surreal but nice comment. it was way nicer."
"after kissing for a few minutes i'd hope it was nicer than nice," jk murmurs, his hands still twirling around nj's hair. he tries not to shiver again.
"also sorry about the matcha incident, again. i wasn't expecting to see you, again. twice in one day is... surreal."
"also sorry about the matcha incident, again. i wasn't expecting to see you, again. twice in one day is... surreal."
jk twitches an eyebrow, smiling. "again with the surreal comment. surely you've seen famous people before. this is seoul."
"i pratically live in that travel bookshop," nj deadpans. "the most exciting thing about my day is when the cafe down the road serves half price coffee."
"i pratically live in that travel bookshop," nj deadpans. "the most exciting thing about my day is when the cafe down the road serves half price coffee."
"i'd call that pretty exciting, everyone loves a bargain."
is he really having an actual conversation with jjk right now? after kissing? with the singer's lips all shiny and glossy - that namjoon has now tasted and wants to taste & lick again?
"i just..." nj hums. "you're jk."
is he really having an actual conversation with jjk right now? after kissing? with the singer's lips all shiny and glossy - that namjoon has now tasted and wants to taste & lick again?
"i just..." nj hums. "you're jk."
jungkook nods, finally releasing his grip from namjoon's neck. "it's probably best to not..." he takes a step back, nj's hands falling from his soft waist. "tell anyone about this."
it takes nj a second to understand. he still can't believe that happened.
it takes nj a second to understand. he still can't believe that happened.
"right, no one." he nods firmly. "i mean i'll tell myself sometimes. but don't worry i won't believe it."
for some reason, jungkook looks at him & smiles, like he's just as captivated as nj is with him. jk fiddles with his bag, takes a step back. he nods towards the door.
for some reason, jungkook looks at him & smiles, like he's just as captivated as nj is with him. jk fiddles with his bag, takes a step back. he nods towards the door.
all good things must come to an end & it seems like nj's fairytale moment has finished its course.
this is one of those things he'll look at back when he's old, that one fleeting moment where jk - korea's sweetheart - gave him a sweet, delicious kiss. why - he still has no idea.
this is one of those things he'll look at back when he's old, that one fleeting moment where jk - korea's sweetheart - gave him a sweet, delicious kiss. why - he still has no idea.
that night nj turns on the tv and almost jumps when it's recording a live show of jk singing at a concert. nj can't help but turn the volume up, leaning back against his sofa as jk sings to the crowds so flawlessly. they're worlds apart, nj realises. never to cross paths again.
time passes slower than ever post jk kiss. and nj sees more ck adverts than EVER before, feeling a little dizzy as he stares at the abs, waist & belly button and wow his hands have been around that waist -
nj digresses. what he's getting at is - without jk life is just.. boring.
nj digresses. what he's getting at is - without jk life is just.. boring.
an annoying man comes into the bookshop, asking if they have anything by shakespeare. to which nj stares at him before slowly explaining it's a travel bookshop... hence no shakespeare. in the end he passes the customer to hobi, who is a lot more happier to take on dificult ones.
a few days roll by when something... unexpected happens. nj's juggling 3 bags full of groceries when his neighbour, seokjin, pops by.
"someone visited you the other day when you were out," he says, helping himself to an apple from one of nj's bags.
"who?" jin just shrugs.
"someone visited you the other day when you were out," he says, helping himself to an apple from one of nj's bags.
"who?" jin just shrugs.
"he looked a little familiar, but he was wearing shades & a huge bucket hat. he said his name was koo, that he's staying at the lotte hotel in gangnam & then... gave himself a completely different name?"
njs heart stops, & then rattles against his chest. "what name?"
njs heart stops, & then rattles against his chest. "what name?"
jin just shrugs. "absolutely no idea. why would he give himself another name?"
namjoon stares at him. jungkook was here... again? to see him? "when was this? how long has it been?"
"2 days ago maybe? i'd just come off my shift, & couldn't sleep 'cos he kept knocking your door."
namjoon stares at him. jungkook was here... again? to see him? "when was this? how long has it been?"
"2 days ago maybe? i'd just come off my shift, & couldn't sleep 'cos he kept knocking your door."
"hyung, think please. my life depends on this... what name did he give?"
20 mins later nj is on the phone to the hotel - trying to explain the situation. that jk's expecting him, but his neighbour can't remember the name. jin shouts loudly as he plays on nj's ps. "try euphoria!"
20 mins later nj is on the phone to the hotel - trying to explain the situation. that jk's expecting him, but his neighbour can't remember the name. jin shouts loudly as he plays on nj's ps. "try euphoria!"
nj holds his breath as he asks the hotel staff if there's anyone staying with that name. "please hold sir - i will connect you."
nj's stomach swoops with butterflies. "i'm through!" he hisses to jin, who whoops but then screams as he taps angrily on the controller.
nj's stomach swoops with butterflies. "i'm through!" he hisses to jin, who whoops but then screams as he taps angrily on the controller.
but... nj hasn't prepared what he's going to say? what did jk even want in the 1st place? nj coughs nervously, clearing his throat. should he sound throaty? deep? casual? happy?
the line crackles, and then he hears jungkook's sweet voice picking up. "hello?"
the line crackles, and then he hears jungkook's sweet voice picking up. "hello?"
"hi! um... this is knj, from the travel bookshop. i... spilled matcha on you. by accident." nj wants to bury himself alive.
"i remember who you are," jk laughs. wow... how is nj this lucky?
"you do?" nj giggles. & then coughs, making his voice drop low. "i mean.. ofc you do."
"i remember who you are," jk laughs. wow... how is nj this lucky?
"you do?" nj giggles. & then coughs, making his voice drop low. "i mean.. ofc you do."
"you played it pretty cool there, knj. waiting 2 days to call."
how does jk sound so beautiful even through a phone? "sorry about that my neighbour never gave me the message until just now. um... perhaps i could..." what is nj even saying?! "drop round for a latte or somehting?"
how does jk sound so beautiful even through a phone? "sorry about that my neighbour never gave me the message until just now. um... perhaps i could..." what is nj even saying?! "drop round for a latte or somehting?"
there's a lot of sound coming from jk's end of the line. "sure, things are pretty here but i might be done by 5pm?"
"excellent. i'll be there. cool. bye." the call ends and nj drops his phone on the sofa in shock.
sj screams again at the screen.
what is nj going to wear?!
"excellent. i'll be there. cool. bye." the call ends and nj drops his phone on the sofa in shock.
sj screams again at the screen.
what is nj going to wear?!
by the time 5 comes around sj has dressed nj up in a suit, & convinced nj to take a boquet of flowers - it's the polite thing to do, right?
he enters the lotto hotel in gangnam with jelly legs, pressing the penthouse floor with a bated breath.
he enters the lotto hotel in gangnam with jelly legs, pressing the penthouse floor with a bated breath.
another man comes in before the doors shut, & they stand in silence until they get out at the top floor. nj looks around in awe, trying to find the room the staff said jk would be in - the golden suite. the man from the lift seems to be going in the same direction too.
nj has a sinking feeling as the man stops outside the golden suite too. is this man here to see jk too? is this jk's boyfriend? what's happening?
nj slowly knocks on the door, giving the man a confused look. the door swings open & a woman shoves a brochure pamphlet at them both.
nj slowly knocks on the door, giving the man a confused look. the door swings open & a woman shoves a brochure pamphlet at them both.
"right this way please!" the suite is massive, and it's full of people who seem to be reporters. nj eyes widen as he takes everything in, every surface area filled with flowers of all kinds.
"name of of the magazine you're from please?"
"elle." the man from the lift says.
"name of of the magazine you're from please?"
"elle." the man from the lift says.
nj freezes. magazine?
the woman turns to nj now, raising an eyebrow. "and you?"
"um..." nj looks around the room, eyes landing on a pile of magazines, the top one... nj coughs. "i'm from golf digest?"
the lady writes down the name on her notepad, leading them to some seats.
the woman turns to nj now, raising an eyebrow. "and you?"
"um..." nj looks around the room, eyes landing on a pile of magazines, the top one... nj coughs. "i'm from golf digest?"
the lady writes down the name on her notepad, leading them to some seats.
"you brough him flowers?" the reporter from elle remarks, looking at the boquet in nj's hands.
"oh," nj's face flushes. "no. these are for my... brother. he's just got a p-promotion?"
why did sj convince him on bringing flowers? the suite is so chaotic, minutes fly by
"oh," nj's face flushes. "no. these are for my... brother. he's just got a p-promotion?"
why did sj convince him on bringing flowers? the suite is so chaotic, minutes fly by
until someone calls out nj's name. "you have 5 minutes," she says, opening a set of wooden doors to reveal - nj's heart stutters - jk.
he turns to look at nj in surprise, eyes a little wide.
"he's from golf digest," the lady says, before attending to some flowers in the room.
he turns to look at nj in surprise, eyes a little wide.
"he's from golf digest," the lady says, before attending to some flowers in the room.
"oh?" jk's eyes twinkle, he sits down on a plush sofa, looking at nj expectantly. "then fire away, sir."
nj sits down stiffly, glancing at the woman who's still fixing a flower arrangement. "right. um. i'm asking you... questions?"
jk nods. "i have a new album out."
"right,"
nj sits down stiffly, glancing at the woman who's still fixing a flower arrangement. "right. um. i'm asking you... questions?"
jk nods. "i have a new album out."
"right,"
"um. do you... like golf, jk-ssi?"
jk blinks. the lady moves to pouring out a glass of water for jk. "i wouldn't say i'm very good at it, no." he says, trying not to laugh.
nj looks down at the flowers still in his hands. "right. will you ever... make a song about golf...?"
jk blinks. the lady moves to pouring out a glass of water for jk. "i wouldn't say i'm very good at it, no." he says, trying not to laugh.
nj looks down at the flowers still in his hands. "right. will you ever... make a song about golf...?"
they both glance towards the lady, who mutters something about lazy reporting under her breath before she leaves the room.
nj breathes out a sigh of relief. "fuck, sorry i - i knocked and they gave me this leaflet and i didn't know, sorry."
"it's fine." jk smiles, bunny teeth.
nj breathes out a sigh of relief. "fuck, sorry i - i knocked and they gave me this leaflet and i didn't know, sorry."
"it's fine." jk smiles, bunny teeth.
"i didn't realise it'd be so busy."
"it's fine," nj insists, handing jk the flowers. "these are for you, sorry i didn't realise you'd have... so many already."
"they're lovely, thank you." jk takes them with a shy smile, placing them next to him.
"sorry," nj says again.
"it's fine," nj insists, handing jk the flowers. "these are for you, sorry i didn't realise you'd have... so many already."
"they're lovely, thank you." jk takes them with a shy smile, placing them next to him.
"sorry," nj says again.
"this is all just very weird." nj admits, laughing. "seeing you, all of this. it's the sort of thing that happens in dreams, not real life." jk stares at him, lips tilted slightly into a smile that nj finds breathtaking. "good dreams, though. it is a dream, seeing you again."
"listen," jk clears his throat, stringing his hands together. "i just wanted to apologise about the whole... kissing thing from the other day? i honestly don't know what came over me and i... just wanted to make sure you were fine about it?"
fine? nj was more than fine about it.
fine? nj was more than fine about it.
"are you free tonight?" nj asks. "we could get some dinner? chicken? ramen?"
jk lets out a hum. "let me just check." he takes out his phone, obviously looking at his schedule or calendar. nj feels a swirl of anxiety. what is he doing?
"i mean if you're busy it's ok. you're jjk"
jk lets out a hum. "let me just check." he takes out his phone, obviously looking at his schedule or calendar. nj feels a swirl of anxiety. what is he doing?
"i mean if you're busy it's ok. you're jjk"
jk only glances at him briefly before looking back at his phone, typing something quickly.
nj licks his lips, nervous. "i'm sure you've got better things to do than hang out with me."
"i had to rearrange a meeting," jk looks up finally. "but i'm free now."
nj pauses. "huh?!"
nj licks his lips, nervous. "i'm sure you've got better things to do than hang out with me."
"i had to rearrange a meeting," jk looks up finally. "but i'm free now."
nj pauses. "huh?!"
"i can have dinner with you," jk replies.
nj breaks out into a smile. "wow that's great? amazing."
jk smiles too, with the sun a hazy glow through the window, jk looks almost angelic.
"shit. no" nj slaps a hand to his face. "um, it's my brother's birthday. there's a party."
nj breaks out into a smile. "wow that's great? amazing."
jk smiles too, with the sun a hazy glow through the window, jk looks almost angelic.
"shit. no" nj slaps a hand to his face. "um, it's my brother's birthday. there's a party."
"that's okay!" jungkook insists.
"no, it's not." nj shakes his head. "um I'll just tell him I can't go - it's fine."
"i meant - i'd be happy to go with you." jk says. "to your brother's party."
"you want to go... to my brother's dinner party?"
"yeah?" jk shrugs. "why not?"
"no, it's not." nj shakes his head. "um I'll just tell him I can't go - it's fine."
"i meant - i'd be happy to go with you." jk says. "to your brother's party."
"you want to go... to my brother's dinner party?"
"yeah?" jk shrugs. "why not?"
"i can be your date."
"my date." nj repeats slowly. "to my little brother's party?" nj had originally bought tae some art gallery tickets... but he supposes this can be like a second present too. he knows tae is a fan of a few singers, maybe jk is one of them? he can't remember.
"my date." nj repeats slowly. "to my little brother's party?" nj had originally bought tae some art gallery tickets... but he supposes this can be like a second present too. he knows tae is a fan of a few singers, maybe jk is one of them? he can't remember.
"if that's alright?" jk asks, furrowing his eyebrows.
"yeah it will be! my neighbour you met is cooking, he's a chef so you shouldn't get any food poisoning that would interfere with your busy schedule."
jk nods, smiling shyly. "okay."
nj hopes they all won't freak out. "ok."
"yeah it will be! my neighbour you met is cooking, he's a chef so you shouldn't get any food poisoning that would interfere with your busy schedule."
jk nods, smiling shyly. "okay."
nj hopes they all won't freak out. "ok."
will they freak out?
🌸at ksj's flat, myeondong🌸
"what did nj say?" sj yells, putting oil in a pan.
jimin looks up from his phone, checking it again. "NJ'S BRINGING A DATE!" he yells.
there's a brief pause, followed by a crash. sj pops his head round the kitchen door. "nj is bringing a WHAT?"
🌸🌸
"what did nj say?" sj yells, putting oil in a pan.
jimin looks up from his phone, checking it again. "NJ'S BRINGING A DATE!" he yells.
there's a brief pause, followed by a crash. sj pops his head round the kitchen door. "nj is bringing a WHAT?"
🌸🌸
"you look great," nj says to a fretting, nervous jk.
the singer clears his throat, hugging the gift bag for tae close to his chest. "you're sure?"
"positive - you look amazing." he looks more than amazing, but they're outside sj's flat & nj needs to stop embarrassing himself.
the singer clears his throat, hugging the gift bag for tae close to his chest. "you're sure?"
"positive - you look amazing." he looks more than amazing, but they're outside sj's flat & nj needs to stop embarrassing himself.
he knocks on the door with a gulp, not sure how the dinner is going to pan out with jk's presence.
jimin & seokjin open it instantly, grinning.
jm is the one who notices first, he blinks, staring hard at jk. then he gasps, takes a step back & hits the door. "oh shit?"
jimin & seokjin open it instantly, grinning.
jm is the one who notices first, he blinks, staring hard at jk. then he gasps, takes a step back & hits the door. "oh shit?"
"um, hi." jungkook waves, why. "i'm jk."
sj blinks. "YOU'RE JK?" he gapes at nj in betrayal. "wait - i saw you? i'd just come off a late shift that night, my eyebags were all the down to my toes. no wonder i didn't recognise you... you weren't excactly dressed discreetly."
sj blinks. "YOU'RE JK?" he gapes at nj in betrayal. "wait - i saw you? i'd just come off a late shift that night, my eyebags were all the down to my toes. no wonder i didn't recognise you... you weren't excactly dressed discreetly."
jm stares at jk, jaw open wide. "what are you doing here? with namjoon? he grows cacti - for fun?"
nj rolls his eyes, ushering jk into the flat. "very funny."
the 4 of them stand there, not blinking at each other.
"my god," sj says after a pause. "jjk is going to eat my food."
nj rolls his eyes, ushering jk into the flat. "very funny."
the 4 of them stand there, not blinking at each other.
"my god," sj says after a pause. "jjk is going to eat my food."
yoongi is next to arrive: he only stares at jk for a moment before the realisation hits, glancing towards sheepish looking nj.
"well," yg says, grabbing a can of beer from the fridge. "this should be fun."
"well," yg says, grabbing a can of beer from the fridge. "this should be fun."
hobi & tae arrive 10 mins late, leaving the rest of them to sit silently at the table, all over them staring at jk & nj.
"i'm confused," jm says. "how did you even meet?"
"he dropped matcha all over me," jk replies.
"nj hyung," jm gasps, "you didn't!"
"it wasn't on purpose!"
"i'm confused," jm says. "how did you even meet?"
"he dropped matcha all over me," jk replies.
"nj hyung," jm gasps, "you didn't!"
"it wasn't on purpose!"
hobi is the next to arrive, knocking non stop on the door until yg opens it. "tae is here!" hs says excited, running to turn off all the lights. "let's hide and jump out and say happy birthday!"
the room turns dark and there's rustling as they all hide.
the room turns dark and there's rustling as they all hide.
"hello?" tae asks as he opens the door, turning on the lights. the room is empty except for someone sitting on the sofa.
"SURPRISE!" everyone yells, jumping from their hiding places, but nj watches as his brother's face morphs from confusion to outright shock, staring at jk.
"SURPRISE!" everyone yells, jumping from their hiding places, but nj watches as his brother's face morphs from confusion to outright shock, staring at jk.
hobi is the only one who doesn't understand what's going on, he looks to tae and then turns to see what tae is so focused on. it takes him four seconds, and then he screams.
tae puts a hand to his mouth, staring at jk. "this is one of my key moments in life... um you're really cool and i'm just..." tae walks towards jk now, grabbing his hand. "i absolutely and utterly adore you. and i always thought we could genuinely be best friends. i love you."
"oi!" jimin says from the other side of the room. "i want to be besties with jk too!"
jk can't help but laugh, the shyness slowly vanishing - these guys seem so friendly and nice. "i got you a present, nj helped me pick it out so i hope -"
tae grabs it, eyes wide. "i love it."
jk can't help but laugh, the shyness slowly vanishing - these guys seem so friendly and nice. "i got you a present, nj helped me pick it out so i hope -"
tae grabs it, eyes wide. "i love it."
when the wine and beer has been poured, jm pulls nj to the side quietly. "you haven't slept with jk have you?"
nj flushes. "jm! that is... personal and! i am not obligated to answer that." he downs a glass of wine. "no comment."
jimin only smirks. "so that's yes then."
"no!"
nj flushes. "jm! that is... personal and! i am not obligated to answer that." he downs a glass of wine. "no comment."
jimin only smirks. "so that's yes then."
"no!"
half way through the food jk asks to be shown where the toilet is, tae leaps up from his seat to take jk there himself. as soon as he's gone the others flock to nj's side, demanding to know if there's any juicy gossip - to which nj cant give.
th comes back, almost in tears. "i can't believe it," he sobs. "i almost walked into the toilet with jk, i was still chatting when he started unbuttoning his jeans, i couldn't stop!"
the others cant help but laugh, none of them can really believe korea's sweetheart is really here
the others cant help but laugh, none of them can really believe korea's sweetheart is really here
once the food has gone the just dance and karaoke comes out, and nj has to warn jk quietly as hobi starts the game that it gets Very Competitive. jk seems to laugh so hard that he begins to cry, clapping and whooping as hobi and nj dance to man eater
jk gets roped into dancing with sj next, the two of them earning top marks for rain on me
they sing happy birthday and tae blows out a tiger cake made by yoongi. the cake is delicious, and nj notices fondly that jk furrows his eyebrows as he eats - clearly enjoying it.
They fight over who gets the last slice of cake, sj announcing he'll gift it to whoever is the most pathetic of them all. yg goes 1st, saying he's in a job he hates when all he wants to do is make music. jm talks about the pigeon who decided his head was a toilet the other day.
"speaking of toilets," th groans, "i think i win since i almost wouldn't leave jk alone - that's more pathetic."
jk shakes his head, laughing. "it was ok," he insists, reaching over to grab taes hand.
taehyung sniffs, promises he's never going to wash his hand ever again.
jk shakes his head, laughing. "it was ok," he insists, reaching over to grab taes hand.
taehyung sniffs, promises he's never going to wash his hand ever again.
"plus I'm besties with jk now," Tae adds, pushing back his hair. "What can I say, he needs me."
"nj hasn't gone yet," jm adds with a grin.
nj flushes, gulping as jk looks at him carefully.
"go on," jk offers, eyes shining.
nj shrugs. "i name my plants, Tae won't let it go."
"nj hasn't gone yet," jm adds with a grin.
nj flushes, gulping as jk looks at him carefully.
"go on," jk offers, eyes shining.
nj shrugs. "i name my plants, Tae won't let it go."
jk laughs, eyes scrunching shut.
"thats not all!" th gasps. "he's the clumsiest person ever, he's had about four different phones this year!"
"thats not all!" th gasps. "he's the clumsiest person ever, he's had about four different phones this year!"
"yeah my life sucks," nj sighs, pretending to cry. "can i have the last slice now?"
"what about me?" jk asks, eyes wide.
"what do you mean?"
at jms question jk nods his head to the last piece of cake, "i want a chance to shoot my shot too, right?"
"you can try," sj nods.
"what about me?" jk asks, eyes wide.
"what do you mean?"
at jms question jk nods his head to the last piece of cake, "i want a chance to shoot my shot too, right?"
"you can try," sj nods.
"i haven't seen my family in like," jk leans back in his chair, thinking deeply. "months. i have hardly any friends because most of them just use me for personal gain & forget I'm a human too with feelings. I'm lonely."
nj blinks, watching as jk fiddles with his hands.
nj blinks, watching as jk fiddles with his hands.
"every time I get my heart broken the media see it as entertainment... plus, I see my face all over the country. It's embarrassing."
the room is silent, all of them staring at jk. "nah" the others shake their heads, moving the cake. "nice try."
jk throws his head back, laughing
the room is silent, all of them staring at jk. "nah" the others shake their heads, moving the cake. "nice try."
jk throws his head back, laughing
"those ck pictures are HOT," hobi adds.
"1000%" Jimin agrees. "if I were you I'd just walk around naked. media be damned."
"1000%" Jimin agrees. "if I were you I'd just walk around naked. media be damned."
the mood is light, teasing but nj still can't help but look at jk in a different way. naturally the singer doesn't open up easily, clearly too used to people walking over him. nj can't even imagine such a life, he gives jk a warm smile as yg takes out his guitar. jk smiles back.
when nj & jk leave the others huddle around them, each hugging jk, squeezing his cheeks.
tae apologises again about the toilet thing, making jk promise to ring him for a shopping outing sometime soon. sj ruffles jks hair, yg pats his shoulders. nj notices jk blinking away tears.
tae apologises again about the toilet thing, making jk promise to ring him for a shopping outing sometime soon. sj ruffles jks hair, yg pats his shoulders. nj notices jk blinking away tears.
they all call out goodbye constantly, as they put on their shoes and step out the door. when it's closed and jk & nj are alone on the corridoor they stare at each other, smiling shyly.
there's a few seconds of silence before sj's flat is full of fanboy screams.
there's a few seconds of silence before sj's flat is full of fanboy screams.
jk can't stop smiling as they walk out of the apartment complex. it's dark now, street lamps lighting up the path like stars.
"i had fun!" jk says, folding his arms against his chest. "i haven't had that much fun in... well. a while."
nj hands twitch, wishing he could reach out
"i had fun!" jk says, folding his arms against his chest. "i haven't had that much fun in... well. a while."
nj hands twitch, wishing he could reach out
and hold jk in his arms.
he resists the urge, putting his hands in his coat pockets instead. "i'm glad, thank you. i don't think tae will forget about for years to come."
it's relaxing, walking underneath the moon with jk beside him. surreal, magical. nj is in awe, still.
he resists the urge, putting his hands in his coat pockets instead. "i'm glad, thank you. i don't think tae will forget about for years to come."
it's relaxing, walking underneath the moon with jk beside him. surreal, magical. nj is in awe, still.
"it's getting late," nj says, glacing at jk who stares wide at passing food vendor stalls. "do you want me to walk you back to your hotel?"
"no."
jk shakes his head, and nj's world shatters. he forgot how they come from different worlds. "oh." he won't deny how much that hurts
"no."
jk shakes his head, and nj's world shatters. he forgot how they come from different worlds. "oh." he won't deny how much that hurts
jk only sighs, turning to face nj. "i meant no as in, i want to do things with you."
nj blinks. "with me?" jk nods, blushing.
"what things do you mean?"
"fun, everyday things. i'm usually so busy by now i'm asleep. what is there to do at night in seoul?"
where does nj start?
nj blinks. "with me?" jk nods, blushing.
"what things do you mean?"
"fun, everyday things. i'm usually so busy by now i'm asleep. what is there to do at night in seoul?"
where does nj start?
they eat bbq chicken skewers, chatting about books, films & art. they stand watching a few buskers for a while, and then continue walking with no clear direction or location in mind.
it's nice - like he and jk could just walk to the ends of the earth, together.
it's nice - like he and jk could just walk to the ends of the earth, together.
nj takes jk to a noraebang - something he instantly regrets when jk is singing like an angel, bossing every song they try. but jk has fun, that's the most important thing.
after when they're walking jk looks up, pointing at namsan. "yknow, i've never been up there."
"really?"
after when they're walking jk looks up, pointing at namsan. "yknow, i've never been up there."
"really?"
they take the bus up to the tower, jk staring out of the window mesmerised as they go up.
they manage to buy last few tickets on sale for the day, not many people in the queue to go up into the lift that takes them all the way to the top.
when they get out nj smiles. "ready?"
they manage to buy last few tickets on sale for the day, not many people in the queue to go up into the lift that takes them all the way to the top.
when they get out nj smiles. "ready?"
"oh that's beautiful." jk gasps as they walk out back into night. buildings are lit up in the sky, everywhere they look like stars and gems.
nj can't help but look at jk, smiling as the other looks out into seoul from above.
"yeah," nj says. "it is."
nj can't help but look at jk, smiling as the other looks out into seoul from above.
"yeah," nj says. "it is."
when jk turns to look at him nj has no time to look away.
he catches jk's small smile, the redness of his ears. "you weren't even looking at the view," jk laughs quietly.
"i was." nj says, still not looking away from jk.
he catches jk's small smile, the redness of his ears. "you weren't even looking at the view," jk laughs quietly.
"i was." nj says, still not looking away from jk.
this time, when jk stands on his tiptoes and leans forwards, nj meets him half way.
the kiss is sweet, filled with nothing but hopes & dreams. the stars of seoul reflect in jks eyes, and nj can't help but kiss him again, and again, and again.
the kiss is sweet, filled with nothing but hopes & dreams. the stars of seoul reflect in jks eyes, and nj can't help but kiss him again, and again, and again.
👨❤️💋👨🫶🏙️🌌.....💞💔❤️🩹
jk smiles against nj's lips, closing his eyes.
"do you want to come to my hotel?" he asks.
nj opens his eyes slowly, not sure he heard jk correctly. "you want me to...?"
jk nods, kissing him again. "yes."
"we probably shouldn't, right?" he asks, quiet.
"maybe," jk murmurs.
"do you want to come to my hotel?" he asks.
nj opens his eyes slowly, not sure he heard jk correctly. "you want me to...?"
jk nods, kissing him again. "yes."
"we probably shouldn't, right?" he asks, quiet.
"maybe," jk murmurs.
"but i want you to, namjoon." jk adds, moving to kiss at nj's dimples. "i want you to."
nj nods so fast he almost stumbles. "okay. yeah. i will."
nj nods so fast he almost stumbles. "okay. yeah. i will."
they get a taxi to the hotel, holding hands as they get into the lift to jk's penthouse suite. on the top floor, jk squeezes his hand.
"give me 5 minutes before you knock?" he asks. "i want everything to be perfect."
nj nods, trying not to think about what will happen after.
"give me 5 minutes before you knock?" he asks. "i want everything to be perfect."
nj nods, trying not to think about what will happen after.
nj paces up and down the corridoor, almost tempted to send a SOS message to one of his friends but he stops at the last moment. he wants this to just be between himself & jk - it's special.
he waits an extra 3 minutes, just trying to calm down any nerves he has. then he knocks.
he waits an extra 3 minutes, just trying to calm down any nerves he has. then he knocks.
jk opens the door in a flash, his eyes wide. "you need to go," he whispers, looking anxious.
"huh?" jk has no time to reply. the door opens wider to reveal another man nj remembers vaguely seeing on a vogue cover one time. the man wraps his hands around jks waist. "who's this?"
"huh?" jk has no time to reply. the door opens wider to reveal another man nj remembers vaguely seeing on a vogue cover one time. the man wraps his hands around jks waist. "who's this?"
nj blinks, eyes unable to stray from the way the man caresses jk's hips. something swirls uneasily in the pit of njs stomach. confusion, sadness.
clearly jk wasn't expecting this man to be here, in his hotel room. but nj can't out jk like that.
"room service," he says.
clearly jk wasn't expecting this man to be here, in his hotel room. but nj can't out jk like that.
"room service," he says.
"excellent!" the man smiles, ushering nj in before jk can even open his mouth. "can we order a bottle of romanée-conti? put it on jk's tab i'm sure he can afford it."
nj nods, stiff. "of course." he glances at jk, who stares down at his feet, his eyes glassy. "i'll be going then"
nj nods, stiff. "of course." he glances at jk, who stares down at his feet, his eyes glassy. "i'll be going then"
"can you clear the table & take away the trash too?" the man asks, nodding at the dirty dishes.
jk sucks in a breath. "no! he can't do that!" he turns to nj now, shaking his head. "please don't."
"it's fine." nj nods, bending to pick up the plates.
jk sucks in a breath. "no! he can't do that!" he turns to nj now, shaking his head. "please don't."
"it's fine." nj nods, bending to pick up the plates.
"he's getting paid." the man says, shrugging. "thanks. in fact - here's an extra tip, i imagine moneys hard at the moment huh?"
the man grins, plopping a 50,000 won note into nj's shirt pocket. he turns to jk now, bending to kiss his neck. nj averts his eyes. "i'm gonna shower."
the man grins, plopping a 50,000 won note into nj's shirt pocket. he turns to jk now, bending to kiss his neck. nj averts his eyes. "i'm gonna shower."
the man leaves, taking off his shirt as he goes.
"nj..." jk starts, stepping forwards. "i - i'm so sorry. i didn't..."
"it's fine, jk." nj insists. "i should go. uh - this is a fairly strange reality to be faced with."
jk stares at him, biting his lip. "i'm so sorry."
"nj..." jk starts, stepping forwards. "i - i'm so sorry. i didn't..."
"it's fine, jk." nj insists. "i should go. uh - this is a fairly strange reality to be faced with."
jk stares at him, biting his lip. "i'm so sorry."
jk turns back his head at the sound of the shower running, the man singing loudly.
"i don't want to say, nj." jk whispers. "i..."
"i think there's only 1 thing we can say." nj replies, looking at the dishes in his hands. he feels stupid. "it's goodbye."
"joon..."
"bye, jk."
"i don't want to say, nj." jk whispers. "i..."
"i think there's only 1 thing we can say." nj replies, looking at the dishes in his hands. he feels stupid. "it's goodbye."
"joon..."
"bye, jk."
nj can't even think as he steps into the lift, mind numb, aching. the further he walks away the more he feels the divide between them both. it clearly wasn't meant to be - how could it? jk was never his in the first place, would never be in the future. he needed to accept that.
🍃🌸interval time & interest check🍃🌸
nj doesn't have the heart to leave the trash or dirty dishes anywhere, he gets a lot of confused looks as he hands them over to the front desk, explaining that he was confused as a waiter. he takes out the 50,000 won putting it behind a vase of flowers for someone else to find.
he slowly walks back to his apartment, allowing his heart to mourn as he listens to an art podcast. the lift is broken again so he counts the steps to stop his mind from straying. he still thinks of jk.
jk jk jk. he closes his eyes, in his mind jk smiles at him.
jk jk jk. he closes his eyes, in his mind jk smiles at him.
he's walking towards his door when there's a tap on his shoulder. his heart rushes for a moment, thinking selfishly it could be jk here to apologise, to kiss him again.
its seokjin.
nj takes out his earphones.
"i thought you were with jk?" he asks, looking confused.
nj sobs.
its seokjin.
nj takes out his earphones.
"i thought you were with jk?" he asks, looking confused.
nj sobs.
sj ushers him into his apartment, sets up the sofa up as a makeshift bed, turns on the great british bake off and gets some chocolate ice cream out of the freezer.
nj doesn't talk about it, sj doesn't ask him. they sit in a comfortable silence, laughing at the innuendos.
nj doesn't talk about it, sj doesn't ask him. they sit in a comfortable silence, laughing at the innuendos.
https://twitter.com/jaffakoo/status/1641051878401163269?t=zZSgaKpIyCHrOfyCUCDyLw&s=19let's go let's go🏃
"I didn't know he was dating anyone," tae says a few days later, when they're all around sjs again, drinking irish bmbs.
nj only shrugs, downing his glass. "Me too, Tae."
"Is he ok?"
Nj stares at his brother. "How should I know?"
"Well what did he say?" Jm asks.
Nj shrugs.
nj only shrugs, downing his glass. "Me too, Tae."
"Is he ok?"
Nj stares at his brother. "How should I know?"
"Well what did he say?" Jm asks.
Nj shrugs.
"he told me i needed to leave then his boyfriend appeared behind the door. seemed pretty obvious to me what he was trying to say."
"did he say that?"
nj looks up at jms question. "what?"
"that they were dating? you don't know who it was?"
"no." nj hums. "but he was familiar."
"did he say that?"
nj looks up at jms question. "what?"
"that they were dating? you don't know who it was?"
"no." nj hums. "but he was familiar."
"seems sketchy to me," tae says, scrolling through the news. "jk doesn't seem like that kind of guy"
"yeah well." nj pours another glass. "he was pretty private."
"poor guy," hobi adds. "hope he's okay."
nj tries to not roll his eyes. "what about me? I'm the one who's hurt."
"yeah well." nj pours another glass. "he was pretty private."
"poor guy," hobi adds. "hope he's okay."
nj tries to not roll his eyes. "what about me? I'm the one who's hurt."
"you have us, though." hobi explains, concerned. "didn't he say was lonely? that he didn't have many friends?"
no one says anything.
"I'm just saying, you're not alone right now joon. i hope he's ok that's all."
nj tries not to think about it. maybe it's just best to forget jk
no one says anything.
"I'm just saying, you're not alone right now joon. i hope he's ok that's all."
nj tries not to think about it. maybe it's just best to forget jk
the days pass, nj hears jks songs everywhere he goes. when he enters a store, turns on the radio or tv. when he dreams.
he asks sj and jm to set him up with someone. sj doesn't think it's a good idea but nj insists, begging he needs to forget about jk before he's consumed.
he asks sj and jm to set him up with someone. sj doesn't think it's a good idea but nj insists, begging he needs to forget about jk before he's consumed.
the first guy spends the whole date complaining about singers and how the music industry is just full of fakes.
njs eyes twitch as he brings up jk as an example, to which jm gasps and belts out "wow would you look at the time, sorry we're busy."
sj laughs and then can't stop.
njs eyes twitch as he brings up jk as an example, to which jm gasps and belts out "wow would you look at the time, sorry we're busy."
sj laughs and then can't stop.
nj doesn't find it very funny. he's supposed to be forgetting about jk, not being reminded of him.
"that's why I'm laughing." sj sighs. "ever heard of the word fate?"
nj scowls, that's not what's happening.
"that's why I'm laughing." sj sighs. "ever heard of the word fate?"
nj scowls, that's not what's happening.
the second date is... okay but he has a weird laugh and his smile doesn't light up the room, doesn't make nj breathless.
the third date doesn't have a cute nose. the fourth date has jk on his phone background and has one of his songs as his ringtone.
the third date doesn't have a cute nose. the fourth date has jk on his phone background and has one of his songs as his ringtone.
after the 7th, the guy doesn't have bunny teeth, nj gives up.
he's not being picky, like yg thinks, he's not trying to see jk in all of the dates, like everyone else thinks.
he's just... lost, he's not sure what can help heal his heart.
sj says the only thing that can is time.
he's not being picky, like yg thinks, he's not trying to see jk in all of the dates, like everyone else thinks.
he's just... lost, he's not sure what can help heal his heart.
sj says the only thing that can is time.
so nj gives himself time. he ignores the papers that reveal a jk scandal - he doesn't read it both for his sake and for jks.
he goes back to the boring life of his travel bookshop, where the same annoying customer still comes in once a week asking for a novel.
he goes back to the boring life of his travel bookshop, where the same annoying customer still comes in once a week asking for a novel.
nj doesn't know how many times he can say "this is a travel bookshop, we sell travel books, not novels."
the jeju book jk bought goes on sale, nj feels his throat close up as he sticks reduced to clear stickers on the front of them.
time passes. nj tries to move on.
the jeju book jk bought goes on sale, nj feels his throat close up as he sticks reduced to clear stickers on the front of them.
time passes. nj tries to move on.
there's a knock on his door one Saturday afternoon & nj opens it unsuspectingly, not bothering to look in the keyhole because sj likes to come around unannounced from time to time.
when he opens the door he's met with jungkook, tears streaming down his face.
"can i come in?"
when he opens the door he's met with jungkook, tears streaming down his face.
"can i come in?"
nj nods, feeling a little like he's only just remembered how to breathe. he opens the door wide for jk to come in, who murmurs out a thank you, hugging his arms across his chest. he looks so small, hurt.
"sorry," jk says after a moment, when nj ushers him to the sofa. "i didn't know who to go to."
nj bites his lips to refrain from asking the question that burns and stings at his tongue. "it's fine," he settles with. "you're always welcome here."
jk sniffles, trying to smile.
nj bites his lips to refrain from asking the question that burns and stings at his tongue. "it's fine," he settles with. "you're always welcome here."
jk sniffles, trying to smile.
"did you read what the media said about me?"
nj shakes his head, tae had asked if nj had seen it but hadn't given any further details. nj doesn't really care about celebrities or gossip. well. maybe with the exception of just one celebrity...
nj shakes his head, tae had asked if nj had seen it but hadn't given any further details. nj doesn't really care about celebrities or gossip. well. maybe with the exception of just one celebrity...
"they found some pictures i did when i was just starting in the business," jk sighs, rubbing at his eyes tiredly. "i was desperate for some money, i was reckless and young and stupid. didn't look at the contract properly. turns out someone was clearly filming the shoot that day."
"it... it looks worse than it does, the pictures. but the media have given it a whole other context, there's reporters all over the hotel. the work i had scheduled got cancelled because of the rumours. i didn't want to face the press. i couldn't."
nj has never seen jk so broken.
nj has never seen jk so broken.
he sits down next to the singer, hoping that the reassuring rub of his shoulders is comforting.
jk blows his nose into some tissue, his eyes red. "are you ever going to ask me about what happened in the hotel? or are we just going to ignore the elephant in the room?"
jk blows his nose into some tissue, his eyes red. "are you ever going to ask me about what happened in the hotel? or are we just going to ignore the elephant in the room?"
nj passes jk a new tissue, their shoulders touching. "i guess it depends on if you like the elephant or not."
jk shakes his head. "he was my ex. we'd parted on... bad terms, and he was trying to make amends. but i said no. he wasn't good."
nj can't deny he's happy to hear that.
jk shakes his head. "he was my ex. we'd parted on... bad terms, and he was trying to make amends. but i said no. he wasn't good."
nj can't deny he's happy to hear that.
the guy was a jerk.
"i panicked, i'm sorry - i really am. i saw you & i just - i didn't know what he would do to you."
"he's not going to bother you again, is he?" nj feels a rush of anger, remembering the nasty vibe the man gave.
jk shakes his head. "i told him to fuck off."
"i panicked, i'm sorry - i really am. i saw you & i just - i didn't know what he would do to you."
"he's not going to bother you again, is he?" nj feels a rush of anger, remembering the nasty vibe the man gave.
jk shakes his head. "i told him to fuck off."
"would you like a tea? coffee? bath?"
jk smiles, grateful and nods his head. "if you don't mind? can i stay here for a while?"
nj tries to ignore the thud of his heart against his chest. it's painful.
"you can stay as long as you want. this is the place you can stay."
jk smiles, grateful and nods his head. "if you don't mind? can i stay here for a while?"
nj tries to ignore the thud of his heart against his chest. it's painful.
"you can stay as long as you want. this is the place you can stay."
nj gives jk some lounge wear, comfy baggy clothes that hang off him and yet make him shine. nj leaves to have a shower, coming back to jk humming a song that's playing on his phone. his new single, he says - one he's been working on for a while.
they sit on the sofa, watching tv, then a bit of a puzzle, then reading books - their socked feet leaning on the small coffee table, their bodies wrapped in blankets.
nj feels jk staring at him, sometimes for a second, other times a lot longer. he chooses to ignore it.
nj feels jk staring at him, sometimes for a second, other times a lot longer. he chooses to ignore it.
as soon as 10pm hits nj starts yawning, which sets jk off in a matching yawn as well. "we should sleep," nj closes his eyes, almost drifting off.
"i can sleep on the sofa," jk mumbles, grabbing the blanket to wrap around himself.
"you have a grammy. you can take the bed."
"i can sleep on the sofa," jk mumbles, grabbing the blanket to wrap around himself.
"you have a grammy. you can take the bed."
nj leads him to his bedroom, thankful that he spent a lot of yesterday cleaning up and putting away his clothes.
he tries to not think about jk in his bed. he begs his mind to not even go there.
jk looks good in his pjs and maybe in another universe they might be together.
he tries to not think about jk in his bed. he begs his mind to not even go there.
jk looks good in his pjs and maybe in another universe they might be together.
it feels like he's in a rom-com, shy smiles as they lean against njs bedroom door.
"well, g'night." jk says, eyes wide, hopeful.
"sweet dreams, jk-ah. see you in the morning."
jk nods fast. nj doesn't expect him to stand on his tiptoes, dropping a sweet kiss to njs cheek.
"well, g'night." jk says, eyes wide, hopeful.
"sweet dreams, jk-ah. see you in the morning."
jk nods fast. nj doesn't expect him to stand on his tiptoes, dropping a sweet kiss to njs cheek.
nj all but runs back to his sofa, hiding in his blankets. he rings sj, explaining the situation.
sj makes a noise down the phone line. "youre telling me jk is currently in your bed, & you're NOT joining him?"
nj flushes. "no!" he hisses, trying to keep his voice down.
sj makes a noise down the phone line. "youre telling me jk is currently in your bed, & you're NOT joining him?"
nj flushes. "no!" he hisses, trying to keep his voice down.
"he's upset!" nj adds, but it sounds like he's making excuses, trying to convince himself. "i can't, it'd be like I'm taking advantage of him. He seems vulnerable, sad."
"maybe he's wanting YOU to make the first move," sj huffs. "he's clearly into you."
nj doesn't agree.
"maybe he's wanting YOU to make the first move," sj huffs. "he's clearly into you."
nj doesn't agree.
he can't help but think their moment (if they even had one in the 1st place) has already fleeted, no longer possible.
after the call with sj, nj stares up at the ceiling, the blankets brought up to his nose, trying to count sheep in his head. he's not going to go to jk, he can't
after the call with sj, nj stares up at the ceiling, the blankets brought up to his nose, trying to count sheep in his head. he's not going to go to jk, he can't
nj thinks he's getting things when there's a creak of the floorboards, coming from his bedroom and towards the living room area.
nj swallows slowly, not moving - still looking up at the ceiling. he must be imagining it right? surely jk isn't the one making the move...?!
nj swallows slowly, not moving - still looking up at the ceiling. he must be imagining it right? surely jk isn't the one making the move...?!
he remains frozen until he sees jk slowly walk into the room, his eyes searching around for nj until he finds him on the sofa, the blankets up to his eyes.
"hi?" nj whispers, peeling back his blankets as he sits up. "everything ok?"
"hi?" nj whispers, peeling back his blankets as he sits up. "everything ok?"
"i can back to bed if you want me too." jk says, gulping.
nj shakes his head. "no. i don't want that."
jk stares at him for a moment. "ok, good. me neither."
nj bolts out of the sofa bed as if on fire, standing in front of jk like he has done a few times. but this feels...
nj shakes his head. "no. i don't want that."
jk stares at him for a moment. "ok, good. me neither."
nj bolts out of the sofa bed as if on fire, standing in front of jk like he has done a few times. but this feels...
their lips meet in an instantaneous second, njs heart beating wildly against his chest. he doesn't want to get used to this feeling, of having jk against his lips - those soft, pink lips that part like melting honey as they come together. nj wraps around jks waist - home.
but then again, nj wants to get used to having jk like this. in a way that's special and private, jk being so perfect & yet so normal, holding his soft hands against nj's shoulders, peeling off nj's pj top and then stepping back to take off his own. nj wants jk - every part.
the kisses are like a melody of one of jks songs, something so beautiful, special. jk pushes the kisses further, the two of them stumbling back against the sofa. nj falls onto his blanket heap & jk follows after, pressing himself against nj gracefully. perfect, perfect, perfect.
"you're scared?" jk sighs against his lips, pulling back slightly to look him in the eyes. jks hair looks messy, and yet perfectly placed. nj can only shrug, highly aware of how jk is sat - on his lap, his thighs hugging around his waist. nj tries to breathe.
"just want to make sure you're ok," he settles on, fingers nervous around jks calves.
"i am." jk smirks, eyes shining. "more than ok. i want this, i want you."
nj wants to ask why - when jk could have anyone he wants in the whole world. but jks boner is digging into his thigh.
"i am." jk smirks, eyes shining. "more than ok. i want this, i want you."
nj wants to ask why - when jk could have anyone he wants in the whole world. but jks boner is digging into his thigh.
nj only wants to do one thing right now.
he nods, still scared to touch jk like he's made out of delicate pottery and could break at any moment. but jk moves for him, grabbing njs hands and placing them firmly on jks ass.
nj sucks in a breath, leaning up to meet jks next kiss.
he nods, still scared to touch jk like he's made out of delicate pottery and could break at any moment. but jk moves for him, grabbing njs hands and placing them firmly on jks ass.
nj sucks in a breath, leaning up to meet jks next kiss.
the rest of their clothes are taken and ripped in a heated blur, nj isn't really sure where they get thrown to but who cares? jjk is on top of him, naked. he wants this moment to be frozen forever, when jk grabs them both, pulling and stroking in a slow, breathtaking rhythm.
he's sure he's seeing stars in jks eyes, the whole galaxy, as he rubs a few fingers against jks hole, breathing in the little gasps and moans that spill out of his sweet lips.
jk is everywhere, nj is all but consumed. he closes his eyes, senses heightened & alert, dizzy. something tells him to just stop thinking so much, to enjoy as jk shakes above him, breath rattling hot against njs neck. after, they stay wrapped up in each others arms, kisses soft.
"did you know you're really big?" jk asks a few lazy kisses later, his hand stroking up his thigh.
nj tries not to squeak, shrugging. "i guess. you're pretty... endowed yourself."
jk snorts, lying against njs chest. "next time i want you in me. bet you'd make me feel so good."
nj tries not to squeak, shrugging. "i guess. you're pretty... endowed yourself."
jk snorts, lying against njs chest. "next time i want you in me. bet you'd make me feel so good."
"...sure." nj does squeak this time. "yeah. i'll try."
"or i could..." jks hand trails up this time time, rubbing against njs chest. nj can't believe he's being shy of all things whilst talking about fucking.
"we can do both." nj hums.
jk nods, smiling shy. "sounds good."
"or i could..." jks hand trails up this time time, rubbing against njs chest. nj can't believe he's being shy of all things whilst talking about fucking.
"we can do both." nj hums.
jk nods, smiling shy. "sounds good."
they fall asleep like that, nj feeling jks heart beating softly against his chest. jk snores, rather loudly but nj loves it. he's unable to stop smiling, stroking his hand through jks velvety hair.
when nj falls asleep he dreams of stars, and an endless ocean.
when nj falls asleep he dreams of stars, and an endless ocean.
jk is a comforting presence next to him, when sleep lingers over him and he presses a kiss and a yawn into jks neck.
they mumble g'mornings against each other, fingers delicate and loving as they explore each other. nj tells jk he's beautiful, more than ever before.
they mumble g'mornings against each other, fingers delicate and loving as they explore each other. nj tells jk he's beautiful, more than ever before.
without his pretty clothes and make up. just himself, his rosy cheeks and his blemishes unhidden.
nj says it again and again, pressing the phrase and sealing it with a heartstopping kiss.
nj says it again and again, pressing the phrase and sealing it with a heartstopping kiss.
suddenly knocks on the door shocks them back into reality. jk sighs against nj, snuggling back into njs chest.
"s'just jin," nj murmurs with a yawn. "I'll get it."
nj begrudgingly gets off jks warm body to find a shirt to throw over his shoulders. sj won't mind.
"s'just jin," nj murmurs with a yawn. "I'll get it."
nj begrudgingly gets off jks warm body to find a shirt to throw over his shoulders. sj won't mind.
he's mid yawn as he opens the door, scratching his hair.
there's a flash of light and nj opens his eyes to a huddle of reporters, their cameras blinding and screaming out if he's jjks boyfriend.
nj steps back, shutting the door. his heart thudding as he turns to see jk.
there's a flash of light and nj opens his eyes to a huddle of reporters, their cameras blinding and screaming out if he's jjks boyfriend.
nj steps back, shutting the door. his heart thudding as he turns to see jk.
"did you call them?"
nj blinks at jks blunt question, his voice cold.
"what? no!"
jk blinks away tears, turning to grab his clothes. "then how the fuck did they find me?" his voice is hoarse, quiet as he chokes down on a sob.
"jk..." nj breathes, "this wasn't me. promise."
nj blinks at jks blunt question, his voice cold.
"what? no!"
jk blinks away tears, turning to grab his clothes. "then how the fuck did they find me?" his voice is hoarse, quiet as he chokes down on a sob.
"jk..." nj breathes, "this wasn't me. promise."
"so you didn't tell anyone?"
njs heart skips a beat. "i... i did but-"
"are you fucking kidding me?"
"i only told sj, he wouldn't have done anything i promise."
jk groans, pulling on his clothes angrily. "you couldn't just keep it to yourself? this is my life."
njs heart skips a beat. "i... i did but-"
"are you fucking kidding me?"
"i only told sj, he wouldn't have done anything i promise."
jk groans, pulling on his clothes angrily. "you couldn't just keep it to yourself? this is my life."
"i didn't do anything-"
jk scoffs, rubbing his eyes. "i shouldn't have come here... the media won't let this go until there's something else. fuck."
nj watches as jk fishes his phone out of his jacket, calling who he assumes is his manager or something similar.
jk scoffs, rubbing his eyes. "i shouldn't have come here... the media won't let this go until there's something else. fuck."
nj watches as jk fishes his phone out of his jacket, calling who he assumes is his manager or something similar.
"i honestly don't know jk, listen to me."
jk just shakes his head. "i always let my guard down. and do things i shouldn't, trust people i shouldn't."
"you can trust me, i promise."
jk ignores him, waiting until his phone rings, a manager saying they're outside.
jk just shakes his head. "i always let my guard down. and do things i shouldn't, trust people i shouldn't."
"you can trust me, i promise."
jk ignores him, waiting until his phone rings, a manager saying they're outside.
"congratulations," jk murmurs, standing by the door. "people will see you now, recognise you as the guy who fucked jjk. now you'll know what it feels like."
"jungkook-ah," nj calls but he just shakes his head, pulling up his hood as he opens the door. there's a dozen of flashes.
"jungkook-ah," nj calls but he just shakes his head, pulling up his hood as he opens the door. there's a dozen of flashes.
reporters shout out jks name, but he ducks his head down, a bodyguard blocking the reporter's as he's taken away.
a few of the media turn back to nj, taking a few more pictures until he shuts the door. he can still hear them murmuring about who he is, what jk was doing here.
a few of the media turn back to nj, taking a few more pictures until he shuts the door. he can still hear them murmuring about who he is, what jk was doing here.
it doesn't take long for sj to shoo the cameras away, and then it's like he's gone backwards in time. except this time he doesn't think there's a way for this to get better. he just hopes jk will be okay
"it wasn't you, was it?" he asks sj, his head in his hands.
sj shakes his head. "i would never, you know that - right?"
"yeah." nj believes him.
"the media is evil, for all you know he could have been followed, and then word spread out."
it's likely, nj thinks.
sj shakes his head. "i would never, you know that - right?"
"yeah." nj believes him.
"the media is evil, for all you know he could have been followed, and then word spread out."
it's likely, nj thinks.
but without jk here, he's at a loss with what to do with himself. it's not that jk was some popstar celebrity so his life was dazzling. but jk, in such a short amount of time, had become someone special, someone nj had loved spending time with. without him life seems meaningless.
scene from the movie, imagine nj just being sad and missing jk with every beat of his heart 😚🤗❤️🩹🍃
nj tries (again) to recover from jk. which doesn't help when tae still listens to his music and more ck pictures get released (underwear pictures, which... nj does not want to talk about because wow)
jm and tae are excited one day, passing nj a folded paper that has a number scrawled across it.
"it's jk's manager's number," jm says, as tae passes nj the newspaper. it's about jk, soon to be going on tour around the world, there's a picture of him with newly dyed blonde hair.
"it's jk's manager's number," jm says, as tae passes nj the newspaper. it's about jk, soon to be going on tour around the world, there's a picture of him with newly dyed blonde hair.
well, nj thinks... it might not be 'new' hair. he's purposefully tried to not read up on jk, who knows how long he's had it for. but it looks nice on him.
when jm & tae leave nj throws the number in the bin & hides the newspaper from view. if jk wanted to see him he would have
when jm & tae leave nj throws the number in the bin & hides the newspaper from view. if jk wanted to see him he would have
a few days later he stumbles, quite literally, on a music video set in dongdaemun. he's only there for the market, but on the way back trips up as he notices some filming going on.
because - is his mind cruelly playing tricks on him or... does that person look like jk?
because - is his mind cruelly playing tricks on him or... does that person look like jk?
"you're not allowed to look, this is private." a security guard calls out to nj, trying to usher him away.
nj nods, frozen, eyes not straying from jk who's getting some make up done. his breath catches in his throat when jk looks up & their eyes meet.
"sir you need to leave."
nj nods, frozen, eyes not straying from jk who's getting some make up done. his breath catches in his throat when jk looks up & their eyes meet.
"sir you need to leave."
"i know jjk," nj says, turning to the guard. "can i just speak to him?"
the guard shakes his head. "i can't let you in."
when nj turns, jk is walking towards him - his face cleverly free of all emotions, unlike nj who feels like his back is sweating as he now passes the guard.
the guard shakes his head. "i can't let you in."
when nj turns, jk is walking towards him - his face cleverly free of all emotions, unlike nj who feels like his back is sweating as he now passes the guard.
"hi," nj breaks the ice first, offering jk a smile. it's been months... too long. but in a way, it's good to see jk again?"i had no idea you were filming something," nj says, looking at the set.
jk nods. "for my tour. listen i... i was going to call. it's just been so busy."
jk nods. "for my tour. listen i... i was going to call. it's just been so busy."
a staff member calls jk with a megaphone, saying they're behind schedule.
"sorry it's the last day of filming and we're really behind."
"it's fine," nj smiles. "sorry, i won't disturb you anymore. it was good to see you."
"sorry it's the last day of filming and we're really behind."
"it's fine," nj smiles. "sorry, i won't disturb you anymore. it was good to see you."
"wait!" jk says quickly, grabbing njs hand. "i... i have some stuff i wanted to say. if you want to wait until i'm done... and we could get a bite to eat?"
that familiar rush of butterflies fills his stomach again, only present when he's near jk. "sure. i can wait."
that familiar rush of butterflies fills his stomach again, only present when he's near jk. "sure. i can wait."
jk looks relieved, flashing nj a grateful smile before he leads him to some seats by the side. then he hurries away, getting his makeup retouched before he speaks with a director.
the camera man passes joon some headphones, explaining the premise of the video they're creating.
the camera man passes joon some headphones, explaining the premise of the video they're creating.
nj puts the headphones on, immediately listening to jk confirming stage directions with a stage manager.
someone calls for a 5 minute break as they check the stage lighting, and jk is taken somewhere out of the sun.
"we won't finish today." someone huffs in the headphones.
someone calls for a 5 minute break as they check the stage lighting, and jk is taken somewhere out of the sun.
"we won't finish today." someone huffs in the headphones.
nj glances around, trying to see who it is.
"we have to." jk sighs, there's a sound of a water bottle opening. "i'm in busan the day after tomorrow."
"who knows when we'll finish." the other one mutters. "today's been wild. speaking of, who's the guy who's come to see you?"
"we have to." jk sighs, there's a sound of a water bottle opening. "i'm in busan the day after tomorrow."
"who knows when we'll finish." the other one mutters. "today's been wild. speaking of, who's the guy who's come to see you?"
nj perks up a little, if he raises his neck he can just make out jk from under the roof of a caravan.
"oh," jk chugs down some of his water before wiping at his mouth. "um, just some guy i used to know. i don't know what he's doing here actually."
oh... nj blinks.
"oh," jk chugs down some of his water before wiping at his mouth. "um, just some guy i used to know. i don't know what he's doing here actually."
oh... nj blinks.
the guy jk is talking to lets out a small laugh. "you should tell him to go. you don't want any nasty rumours again do you? him being here, you never know what people might think. and you wouldn't want that, would you?"
nj pulls off the headphones, heart thrumming wildly.
nj pulls off the headphones, heart thrumming wildly.
luckily, it seems no one else was listening in on the conversation. all the staff are madly running around, trying to sort out the lighting.
nj blinks away a few tears, feeling like he's been hit by a truck or 20. he should go... he's not helping at all. jk doesn't want him here
nj blinks away a few tears, feeling like he's been hit by a truck or 20. he should go... he's not helping at all. jk doesn't want him here
what was he even thinking, coming onto jks set like they were friends?
jk called him someone from the past. he's not relevant in the singers life anymore. it seems like it's only been nj who's been unable to let go.
he hands the headphone set back to the staff member, & leaves.
jk called him someone from the past. he's not relevant in the singers life anymore. it seems like it's only been nj who's been unable to let go.
he hands the headphone set back to the staff member, & leaves.
when he gets back to the travel bookshop he locks himself in the toilet and stares at himself in the mirror.
hobi knocks on the door after a few minutes, asking if he's ok.
"fine!" nj calls, slapping cold water on his face. he just needs to calm down. and forget about jk...
hobi knocks on the door after a few minutes, asking if he's ok.
"fine!" nj calls, slapping cold water on his face. he just needs to calm down. and forget about jk...
forget about him once and for all. because every time before he's failed, and fept falling deeper and deeper. and each time it hurts more than last time.
it was always too good to be true, the idea of him and jk. a dream, that's all.
it was always too good to be true, the idea of him and jk. a dream, that's all.
hobi knocks on the door again, a bit more urgently this time.
"yeah!" nj yells. "just give me a sec."
"there's someone here to see you, joon." hobi says, tapping against the door again. "i think you'll want to see them."
"yeah!" nj yells. "just give me a sec."
"there's someone here to see you, joon." hobi says, tapping against the door again. "i think you'll want to see them."
it seems like fate, as always, has other plans in store - when he steps out back onto the shop floor there jk stands. his eyes are wide, worried, back hunched like he's going to make a run for it at any moment.
but when his eyes land on nj, something in jks body relaxes slightly.
but when his eyes land on nj, something in jks body relaxes slightly.
hobi leaves with a quick pat on njs shoulder, then they're alone. jk squirms, tucking his hands into his jacket pocket.
"you uh... you disappeared," he laughs lightly, flashing him a nervous smile. "i didn't know where you'd gone."
"ah yeah sorry, didn't want to disturb you."
"you uh... you disappeared," he laughs lightly, flashing him a nervous smile. "i didn't know where you'd gone."
"ah yeah sorry, didn't want to disturb you."
"i wanted to apologise for how i behaved last time," jk licks his lips, hair falling into his eyes. "i'd been in that situation before, someone i was with calling the media. i thought it was just like then, all over again. i acted rash. i should have known you would have never-"
jk clears his throat, pushing the hair out of his eyes. "turns out i was followed, that night. a reporter spotted me by the hotel and traced my steps. they wanted a story, and called them all here in the hopes of getting something juicy. to which they - uh did."
jk glances at nj, then looks down at his birkenstocks. "sorry."
"it's fine." nj mumbles, trying to control his emotions. "i'm just.. i didn't realise you thought so badly of me. to think i'd even do that-"
"i don't, at all. you're the best guy i've ever met. i just got scared."
"it's fine." nj mumbles, trying to control his emotions. "i'm just.. i didn't realise you thought so badly of me. to think i'd even do that-"
"i don't, at all. you're the best guy i've ever met. i just got scared."
when nj doesn't say anything (he's still processing his thoughts, trying to understand) jk continues on, clearly nervous.
"i know it's not a good excuse. i liked you so much & my world caved in i didn't think - it was a mistake, saying that stuff to you. you didn't deserve it."
"i know it's not a good excuse. i liked you so much & my world caved in i didn't think - it was a mistake, saying that stuff to you. you didn't deserve it."
"sorry," jk scratches at his ear now. "i'm rambling aren't i? i - i had a speech planned, what i would say after i'd finished on set but you were gone. so uh." nj has never seen jk so nervous before, it makes a change.
"i wanted to know if.. you would want to see me again?"
"i wanted to know if.. you would want to see me again?"
"i know it's a big ask, after everything and that i hurt you. but if you wanted to see me? a little - or a lot."
jk stares at him like he's waiting for the sun to rise - anticipation and hope wide in his eyes.
"but," nj blinks, confused. "on set - you were asked who i was."
jk stares at him like he's waiting for the sun to rise - anticipation and hope wide in his eyes.
"but," nj blinks, confused. "on set - you were asked who i was."
something flashes in jks eyes as nj speaks. "you told him i was no one? that you didn't know why i was there. your mic was on- i was given headphones, didn't mean to pry."
"i didn't think it was necessary, telling a coworker who i know gossips like breathing about my love life."
"i didn't think it was necessary, telling a coworker who i know gossips like breathing about my love life."
"that's just the thing though," nj starts, staring jk hard in the eyes. "it's always what YOU think. you say this stuff & don't think about consequences, about the other person. what about the next time someone asks you? are you just going to ignore things like that forever?"
"i..." jk blinks, his eyes look tearful, nj has to look away. "i didn't think. it was just such a hectic day. you're right. shouldn't have done that."
"i just- i don't think i can do this anymore." nj says the words & instantly his chest feels light. "you & me. it hurts."
"i just- i don't think i can do this anymore." nj says the words & instantly his chest feels light. "you & me. it hurts."
"you're always looking out for yourself, right?" nj adds. "i'm just doing the same, but for me. i deserve better, a lot more."
"oh," jk tries to smile, nodding. "i understand. you do - deserve better. i'm sorry. sorry i couldn't."
"we're too different anyways," nj hates the way jk looks so broken. but he's making the right decision. "i've realised i'm kinda fond of normality."
"we're too different anyways," nj hates the way jk looks so broken. but he's making the right decision. "i've realised i'm kinda fond of normality."
"fame is just stupid," jk shakes his head. "i'm also just." he bites at his lip, chocolate chip mole making an appearance. "i'm just a boy standing in front of another boy. asking him to love him. for another chance."
njs heart breaks, but the damage has already been done.
njs heart breaks, but the damage has already been done.
"sorry," jk wipes at his eyes. "i'll go. i... see you, nj-ah."
jk turns to leave, the door bell ringing as it normally does when it opens. there's a rush of wind as jk leaves, leaving nj with goosebumps on his arms.
you rub salt on an open wound to make it heal faster, right?
jk turns to leave, the door bell ringing as it normally does when it opens. there's a rush of wind as jk leaves, leaving nj with goosebumps on his arms.
you rub salt on an open wound to make it heal faster, right?
hobi pops his round the door a few minutes later, his face full of worry. "joon..."
"i don't want to hear it hobi. sorry."
"i'm proud of you, that's all." hs says, pulling him into a hug. "shall i get the boys together? night at sj hyungs?"
nj nods. that sounds nice.
"i don't want to hear it hobi. sorry."
"i'm proud of you, that's all." hs says, pulling him into a hug. "shall i get the boys together? night at sj hyungs?"
nj nods. that sounds nice.
"you did the right thing," yg says a few hours later when they're all at sj's, on their 2nd beer. "like you said, your happiness matters too."
"never trust a singer," sj nods. "not worth the drama."
"you did good, hyung." tae smiles. "sometimes the right thing is hard."
"never trust a singer," sj nods. "not worth the drama."
"you did good, hyung." tae smiles. "sometimes the right thing is hard."
suddenly jks laugh fills the room. nj jumps, a hand jolting to his heart. is he starting to hear jk everywhere now? why does jk have a cute laugh?
"sorry!" tae coughs, grabbing his phone.
"why is jk your ringtone?" sj asks a blushing th. "why are you betraying your own hyung!"
"sorry!" tae coughs, grabbing his phone.
"why is jk your ringtone?" sj asks a blushing th. "why are you betraying your own hyung!"
"he's not my ringtone!" th huffs. "it's only for special jk notifs. i still have a few months left of the jk membership! might as well get my moneys worth!"
nj clears his throat, pouring himself another drink.
tae unlocks his phone. "it just means he's posted something."
nj clears his throat, pouring himself another drink.
tae unlocks his phone. "it just means he's posted something."
"don't look at it!" jm shouts, swatting at th's arm. "he's the enemy right now! have a bit of consideration!"
"i'm nosy!" th shushes, clicking on something with curious eyes. he lifts his phone to his ear, listening to something.
"i'm nosy!" th shushes, clicking on something with curious eyes. he lifts his phone to his ear, listening to something.
after exactly 3 minutes and 55 seconds, tae puts the phone down. "ah."
nj realises he's holding his breath.
"what?" hs asks. "what was it?"
"thought i wasn't supposed to say?" th says, huffing. "does it matter?"
"depends on what it is..." jm says.
"well..." th sighs.
nj realises he's holding his breath.
"what?" hs asks. "what was it?"
"thought i wasn't supposed to say?" th says, huffing. "does it matter?"
"depends on what it is..." jm says.
"well..." th sighs.
"he covered a song."
"which?" "a song?!" "he's got some nerve!" "what song?"
four questions get blurted out at the same time, nj feels something uneasy in his stomach again. isn't it supposed to get better? why is he feeling like this?
"which?" "a song?!" "he's got some nerve!" "what song?"
four questions get blurted out at the same time, nj feels something uneasy in his stomach again. isn't it supposed to get better? why is he feeling like this?
"i'll just... play it." tae coughs, pressing something on his phone. soundcloud.com/bangtan/fools-…
it seems jk can play the piano as well. a soft melody flutters softly out of tae's phone. and then jk starts singing.
only fools. it's my mistake. only fools do what i do. only fools.
only fools. it's my mistake. only fools do what i do. only fools.
only fools fall for you.
the song ends, and 3 minutes and 55 seconds later nj feels like he can breathe again.
sj is the first to speak. "well. fuck."
sj is the first to speak. "well. fuck."
"doesn't change anything though," jm adds quickly. "nj did the right thing."
"sure," sj agrees. "just. you could feel the sadness in his voice. songs like that make me emotional."
"i think it's pretty amazing," tae grins. "having someone like you that much. it is romantic."
"sure," sj agrees. "just. you could feel the sadness in his voice. songs like that make me emotional."
"i think it's pretty amazing," tae grins. "having someone like you that much. it is romantic."
"he was cute," nj inputs, finding his voice again. "what he said... it did resonate with me but after everything i just..."
"what exactly did he say?" yg quirks an eyebrow.
"what exactly did he say?" yg quirks an eyebrow.
"i mean.. i know he's a singer, so surely he can convey emotion easily, right?" nj lets out a weak laugh. "but he basically said, he might be as famous as can be but also that he was just a boy, standing in front of another boy, asking for another chance at love."
sj's mouth drops open as yg leans back in surprise. "huh."
jm scratches his ear, hs lets out a low whistle.
"what?" nj asks them, his palms sweaty.
"just, sounds like he really put his heart out on a platter, that's all." sj says after a moment. "he's calling himself a fool."
jm scratches his ear, hs lets out a low whistle.
"what?" nj asks them, his palms sweaty.
"just, sounds like he really put his heart out on a platter, that's all." sj says after a moment. "he's calling himself a fool."
"i'm not saying what he did in the past was right, nor am i saying he's faultless. but - love is tricky. it's hard work. it sounds like he's trying to sort out what he feels. and that's a good thing, isn't it? it's a start."
"you do what you think is best, joon." yg says. "but maybe you both need to talk - properly this time. that song was for you- he's just unable to express himself after living the way he has for so long. then you can leave, head held high."
nj wants to cry. has he made a mistake?
nj wants to cry. has he made a mistake?
no - it wasn't a mistake.
but... maybe yg is right? emotions were high, especially after not seeing each other in months. he has no idea of jks past relationships... they clearly need to talk about things, be honest and truthful.
but... maybe yg is right? emotions were high, especially after not seeing each other in months. he has no idea of jks past relationships... they clearly need to talk about things, be honest and truthful.
he can do this. he'll just ring jk up -they can have a mature, adult conversation. he can give jk the chance to say what he wants, if the song was for him anyways.
it sounds like a good plan- a start to some well needed healing.
"oh." tae gasps. "jk is going on a world tour."
it sounds like a good plan- a start to some well needed healing.
"oh." tae gasps. "jk is going on a world tour."
"yeah," nj says. "so?"
"hyung. so... he's not going to be here for... well it could be a week or two... or... longer."
nj blinks. he never knew they could last so long. "how long?"
"they can last months, hyung."
"hyung. so... he's not going to be here for... well it could be a week or two... or... longer."
nj blinks. he never knew they could last so long. "how long?"
"they can last months, hyung."
nj had never considered the idea of... months. "oh." he blinks. "he starts the tour in busan tomorrow. i don't know after."
"i tried to book seoul tickets last year," tae sighs. "they sold out too fast. he ends in seoul, after busan it's japan, then around the world."
"i tried to book seoul tickets last year," tae sighs. "they sold out too fast. he ends in seoul, after busan it's japan, then around the world."
https://twitter.com/jaffakoo/status/1641051878401163269beginning of thread au
nj gulps, mind racing. he doesn't know what to do- if jk will even want to see him again, after nj already turned him down. would jk care? want to talk like nj wants? fully & honestly, laying their cards on the table so to speak.
if nj wants to even consider the prospect of a future of them together then... talking would be the first thing to tackle. trust.
if jk didn't like that then, nj can leave, it'd be fine. but if jk is ready to do that, is willing...
nj has to give him - them - one last chance.
if jk didn't like that then, nj can leave, it'd be fine. but if jk is ready to do that, is willing...
nj has to give him - them - one last chance.
and that means... trying to see him as soon as possible. Jk is performing in Busan tomorrow. If nj is able to meet him then it would settle this.
"can someone check to see if there's any spare tickets running tomorrow to Busan on ktx?"
"can someone check to see if there's any spare tickets running tomorrow to Busan on ktx?"
jm makes a strangled sigh as he searches on his phone, shaking his head. "literally all sold out, what time is the concert?"
tae answers like the true fanboy he is. "6pm." he checks his watch, "we have fifteen hours to think of a plan and then be acting on it - or it's passed."
tae answers like the true fanboy he is. "6pm." he checks his watch, "we have fifteen hours to think of a plan and then be acting on it - or it's passed."
"how about flying?" sj offers, you'll get there faster. gimpo isn't too far-"
"i'm on it!" hobi calls, typing aggresively on his phone, frowning as he searches. "there's a few. not many..."
yngi sighs, getting up from his seat.
"i'm on it!" hobi calls, typing aggresively on his phone, frowning as he searches. "there's a few. not many..."
yngi sighs, getting up from his seat.
he doesn't say anything as he pulls his car keys out of his pocket, dangling them musically. "come on losers, we're driving to busan."
"DRIVING?" nj gapes. "but that takes-"
"like 6 hours!" jm moans.
"with me driving, i'll get us there in 5."
"DRIVING?" nj gapes. "but that takes-"
"like 6 hours!" jm moans.
"with me driving, i'll get us there in 5."
the next 20 minutes are chaotic - to say the least. there's a queue for the toilet, sj packs anything & everything they might need (including blankets, food, batteries and gimbap). yg fills up his car and soon they're walking to the car.
"how are we all going to fit?" tae asks.
"how are we all going to fit?" tae asks.
as the youngest, tae gets the short straw. he's given the choice of lying horizontally by everyone's feet or sit half on sj & half on hobi. he chooses the latter, the 3 of them rather quiet & flushed as they all get in one after another.
"ok," yg pops on his shades. "ready?"
"ok," yg pops on his shades. "ready?"
"wait!" th cries. "i don't have my jk lightstick!"
jm huffs. "i'm sure you'll survive-"
"i will not!" tae shakes his head. "even if i'm outside the stadium listening to him sing-i can't go there without it. i'd be committing a crime."
yg starts the engine. "jk will forgive you."
jm huffs. "i'm sure you'll survive-"
"i will not!" tae shakes his head. "even if i'm outside the stadium listening to him sing-i can't go there without it. i'd be committing a crime."
yg starts the engine. "jk will forgive you."
the satnav is turned on, the 6 hours mocking nj as yg sets off, the tyres screeching.
nj grips hold of his seatbelt, looking straight ahead. "don't get a speeding ticket."
yg only rolls his eyes, "if you're going to backseat drive i swear- any of you for that matter!"
nj grips hold of his seatbelt, looking straight ahead. "don't get a speeding ticket."
yg only rolls his eyes, "if you're going to backseat drive i swear- any of you for that matter!"
"turn right yg-hyung!" jm yells.
yg curses, swerving just in time to make it onto the route for the highway. he clicks at his tongue, fingers relaxing against the wheel. "someone turn on some music. i wanna listen to some agustd before his new album & the bb100's like crazy."
yg curses, swerving just in time to make it onto the route for the highway. he clicks at his tongue, fingers relaxing against the wheel. "someone turn on some music. i wanna listen to some agustd before his new album & the bb100's like crazy."
( just imagine them being like this asklfjalkfa i love them my boys🥺😭😩)
an hour and a half into the ride, sj wants some snacks so they stop at a services nearby. hs takes over from yng, putting on his sunglasses as he begins driving. the satnav calculates traffic up ahead on the highway, adding an extra hour to the journey.
hs turns on the radio as their phones charge, running out of battery quickly after playing so many songs. the radio hosts annouces that, due to some unforeseen wet windy weather, jks concert is being pushed an hour earlier.
"fuck," hs sighs, as the car slows to a halt. traffic
"fuck," hs sighs, as the car slows to a halt. traffic
as if the day couldn't get any worse, rain starts to batter down on the car - the drops sounding like hail against the roof. the wipers turn on, so fast it makes nj feel dizzy.
the gridlock gets worse, and soon they halt to a complete stop - not even moving.
after 20 mins nj is growing restless. they've still got two hours left of their journey - but with this traffic it could be even double.
after 20 mins nj is growing restless. they've still got two hours left of their journey - but with this traffic it could be even double.
something in the car wheezes, hs jumps in the driver's seat.
"what was that?" he asks, turning to yg. "that didn't sound good."
from the back yg calls, "i had it serviced not too long ago - there shouldn't be anything-"
an alert low pressure in one of the back wheels lights.
"what was that?" he asks, turning to yg. "that didn't sound good."
from the back yg calls, "i had it serviced not too long ago - there shouldn't be anything-"
an alert low pressure in one of the back wheels lights.
jm throws his head back against the seat. "really?"
"maybe it was a nail or something," hs checks the dash screen. "someone should check it - i doubt this traffic will be moving any time soon."
"I'll go," nj offers, unbuckling his seatbelt. he feels guilty dragging them along.
"maybe it was a nail or something," hs checks the dash screen. "someone should check it - i doubt this traffic will be moving any time soon."
"I'll go," nj offers, unbuckling his seatbelt. he feels guilty dragging them along.
the tyre has a hole, & is completely, utterly flat. yg rings a vehicle service, but with the traffic gridlocked & the weather slowly getting worse it could take up to five hours until they arrive.
then nj has an idea. crazy maybe. but... "yg hyung. is my bike still in the boot?"
then nj has an idea. crazy maybe. but... "yg hyung. is my bike still in the boot?"
"you are NOT thinking about cycling in this weather!" sj gasps. "those rain drops are the size of golfballs!"
"I've done further miles in worse conditions." nj says, opening the boot.
"you're not dressed for this!" jm says, he's right. but nj is running out of options.
"I've done further miles in worse conditions." nj says, opening the boot.
"you're not dressed for this!" jm says, he's right. but nj is running out of options.
the ride will only take four/five hours, if he takes sensible breaks along then he should still get there in time. (as long as he doesn't crash or fall which sj makes him promise he won't do).
the others will catch him up when the car is fixed. hopefully before the concert.
the others will catch him up when the car is fixed. hopefully before the concert.
nj has the momentum he needs to push forwards on the bike, gripping the handles and then he's off - wind and rain hitting him in the face and blowing all around him.
but he doesn't seem to mind, especially when he thinks about jk somewhere in busan.
but he doesn't seem to mind, especially when he thinks about jk somewhere in busan.
for safety, yg makes him wear a helmet and then one of the guys rings him every hour to check he's still alive.
his thighs are burning, chest heaving as he stops a few times for water and a stretch. but he keeps going, all he can think about is what if he gets there too late.
his thighs are burning, chest heaving as he stops a few times for water and a stretch. but he keeps going, all he can think about is what if he gets there too late.
he tries to not think about what happens after he gets to busan... if he'll even be able to find jk. if he'll be even allowed to speak to him.
but that's for future nj to think and worry about, for now he cycles.
but that's for future nj to think and worry about, for now he cycles.
he has a one near death experience when a squirrel runs across and he has to skid to a complete stop, swerving to miss it. the squirrel is fine, nj is fine. he checks his phone, calculating the distance left and how long it'll take.
just as he's getting into busan 2.5 hours later yg calls - the traffic has been fixed and the service vehicle repair is on its way.
jks concert is in 3 hours. his legs feel like they're about to fall off but - something to pushes him to pedal faster.
jks concert is in 3 hours. his legs feel like they're about to fall off but - something to pushes him to pedal faster.
his clothed are drenched, both with sweat and from the harsh rain. he can feel his chest heaving and his cheeks are probably a deep scarlet.
he starts noticing fans after a short while, holding jk pockets and slogans, waving his lightstick in the air.
he starts noticing fans after a short while, holding jk pockets and slogans, waving his lightstick in the air.
finally, FINALLY he gets to the concert venue. he has to stop a few times, toilet breaks, food, drinks. people stare at him as he continues on, most likely because he's almost gasping as he pedals on, face contorted with pain as his thighs seize up.
but what the fuck does he do now?
a fanboy around taes age asks nj if he's ok, he's holding a jk sign and has his lightstick in his other hand.
nj nods, looking around to see if there's security or someone in charge.
a fanboy around taes age asks nj if he's ok, he's holding a jk sign and has his lightstick in his other hand.
nj nods, looking around to see if there's security or someone in charge.
maybe he shouldn't have thrown away jks managers number that tae gave him... that would be useful right about now. but surely he'd just sound like he's lying?
who's going to believe him when he says he needs to speak jk? what if they ask jk and jk doesn't want to talk to nj?
who's going to believe him when he says he needs to speak jk? what if they ask jk and jk doesn't want to talk to nj?
there's a security guard a little further up before tickets are checked, so nj pushes his bike, heart beating wildly.
"oi," the guard calls him, frowning at the bike. "you can't ride that here."
nj gulps, "technically I'm not riding it."
the guard glares even more.
"oi," the guard calls him, frowning at the bike. "you can't ride that here."
nj gulps, "technically I'm not riding it."
the guard glares even more.
"no bikes allowed."
"I'm looking for jk can I... can I speak to him please?"
the guard stares at him, then points to the ticket line. "he'll be on stage in two hours, you can see him then."
"i um, I'm a friend? if you tell him knj is here to see him then he'll know who i am."
"I'm looking for jk can I... can I speak to him please?"
the guard stares at him, then points to the ticket line. "he'll be on stage in two hours, you can see him then."
"i um, I'm a friend? if you tell him knj is here to see him then he'll know who i am."
the guard only laughs. "nice try, just see the concert kid."
njs throat feels like it's on fire. "but I don't have a ticket-"
the guard Huff's, folding their big burly arms. "then you need to leave. or else I'll escort you off the premise and take you to the police."
njs throat feels like it's on fire. "but I don't have a ticket-"
the guard Huff's, folding their big burly arms. "then you need to leave. or else I'll escort you off the premise and take you to the police."
nj walks out of the venue with his tail between his legs. he can't believe it - what the fuck should he do? why did he think something will magically happen - as if he's in some rom-com twt au based off a rom-com 90s movie where there's always a happy ending?
he rings sj in a panic. "im stuck? I stink of sweat, I can't get through because I don't have a t-ticket & a security guard threatened to arrest me!"
they're not sure what else they can try, but they're finally in busan and tell him to wait there. his friends are on their way.
they're not sure what else they can try, but they're finally in busan and tell him to wait there. his friends are on their way.
they arrive with the stereo blaring out music and then out they come one by one, hs holding a tray of pizza.
njs stomach groans in hunger and he staggers towards them, thighs still burning as he grabs two slices and pushes them in his mouth.
njs stomach groans in hunger and he staggers towards them, thighs still burning as he grabs two slices and pushes them in his mouth.
"have you pretended to be a security guard?" jm asks, opening up an umbrella as they stand in front of the stadium.
nj shakes his head, he doesn't want to get arrested
nj shakes his head, he doesn't want to get arrested
"I'll try," hs says, smoothing out his hair. "I'll bring out the charm and he'll tell us exactly where to find jk."
40 seconds later hs is running back, the guard threatening to arrest him too.
40 seconds later hs is running back, the guard threatening to arrest him too.
"maybe we should head back," sj shouts from under an umbrella, the rain heavy and hard on the material.
nj shakes his heart dropping. is this really how it'll end? after everything?
nj shakes his heart dropping. is this really how it'll end? after everything?
the line for the ticket check slows down until there's just a few left, the stadium is full of fans, all cheering and screaming jks name.
nj wants to sob, wishing he could scream out too
nj wants to sob, wishing he could scream out too
th managed to buy a lightstick and lights it up, linking his arm through jms and joining in on the chant. there's hundreds of fans waiting outside like them, all of them excited despite not seeing jk.
one fan manages to find a livestream and the link gets discreetly passed around. the 6 of them huddle around taes phone since he has the most battery left. the screams from the stadium get louder and louder a g concert finally starts
some music starts and Tae gasps two seconds later, gaping as he must recognise the tune.
"no! oh my god!" the other fans around do the same, clearly something... big is about to happen.
"hyung," tae sighs, slapping njs arm. "good fucking luck."
tae is starting to scare him.
"no! oh my god!" the other fans around do the same, clearly something... big is about to happen.
"hyung," tae sighs, slapping njs arm. "good fucking luck."
tae is starting to scare him.
on the live stream jk arrives on the stage, wearing a... beautifully reveling red and leopard ensemble that has njs eyes bulging out of his sockets.
jk dances with the music before he starts singing and nj is mesmerized
jk dances with the music before he starts singing and nj is mesmerized
nj gives a no comment statement at the dance break, as Tae and the thousands of fans scream
jk's voice echoes through the stadium as the song comes to an end, the crowds cheering and chanting his name.
on the livestream jk giggles and waves. "hello busan!" it's weird - being able to hear him through the stream but also in the stadium, there's a small 3 second lag.
on the livestream jk giggles and waves. "hello busan!" it's weird - being able to hear him through the stream but also in the stadium, there's a small 3 second lag.
a jk fanchant starts, th and jm and the rest of the fans outside joining in.
"i'm jk! i hope you have fun tonight!" jk gives a loveheart out and the fans scream. njs heart drums against his chest. he looks so happy, maybe he doesn't miss nj or is sad about what happened at all.
"i'm jk! i hope you have fun tonight!" jk gives a loveheart out and the fans scream. njs heart drums against his chest. he looks so happy, maybe he doesn't miss nj or is sad about what happened at all.
"my heart is hurting a little right now," jks voice echoes out from the stadium, sending a shiver up & down nj's spine - making his toes tingle. "but seeing you all right now makes me feel so warm!"
nj blinks, the 5 of his friends looking up from the phone to check on him.
nj blinks, the 5 of his friends looking up from the phone to check on him.
the stage lights dim as a short video appears, nj notices the outfit being what jk was filming just the other day.
"joon?" hs says, hugging his shoulders tight. "it's ok."
nj can only nod. for jk to annouce that to his fans, something so personal - nj doesn't know what to say.
"joon?" hs says, hugging his shoulders tight. "it's ok."
nj can only nod. for jk to annouce that to his fans, something so personal - nj doesn't know what to say.
a short break later the lights turn back on, the lightsticks flashing purple against the night sky. music starts again and tae gasps (again).
"oh oh!" he squeals, shaking yg's shoulders excitedly. "this is one of his new songs! he only released it recently!"
"oh oh!" he squeals, shaking yg's shoulders excitedly. "this is one of his new songs! he only released it recently!"
jks vocals are angelic, the lyrics sweet like cotton candy. nj cant stray his eyes from tae's phone, watching as jk swoops over the crowds, singing about love.
the song ends, the crowds cheer. nj blinks away a few tears.
"i know he's not here tonight," jks voice rings out. "but - i wrote that for someone. i'm not the best at expressing myself, but i hope one day he might listen to it, and know how happy he really made me feel."
"i know he's not here tonight," jks voice rings out. "but - i wrote that for someone. i'm not the best at expressing myself, but i hope one day he might listen to it, and know how happy he really made me feel."
tae shrieks, looking up at nj, grinning wide. "HYUNG! HE'S TALKING ABOUT YOU!"
hs shushes him, making sure no one can hear them. but everyone's screaming & chanting, no one's listening.
nj blinks, shaking his head. no. no way? it can't be about him. right? ... RIGHT?
hs shushes him, making sure no one can hear them. but everyone's screaming & chanting, no one's listening.
nj blinks, shaking his head. no. no way? it can't be about him. right? ... RIGHT?
"of course he's talking about you!" yg laughs.
"cannot believe i'm going to have jjk as my brother in law some day!" tae screeches.
nj shakes his head, trying not to smile. but, his palms are sweating. jk doesn't know he's here. nj might still never see him again.
"cannot believe i'm going to have jjk as my brother in law some day!" tae screeches.
nj shakes his head, trying not to smile. but, his palms are sweating. jk doesn't know he's here. nj might still never see him again.
so do his words really mean anything? what if nj had never heard those words? and they both just continued on with life, unsuspectingly. because that's what was most likely to happen. jk doesn't know nj is here. and he won't ever. because nj can't get to jk - he's too far away.
this moment, with nj watching the concert on a grainy livestream from outside the stadium, with his little brother and his 5 closest best friends, listening to the stadium screams, chanting out jks name: it's just a fleeting moment like dandelion seeds floating in the wind.
jk will do so many more concerts like this, forever in the spotlight and think about that one weird guy who spilled matcha on him once upon a time in myeongdong.
and nj will see jks face everywhere, and his songs. this one concert connects them but only for a second.
and nj will see jks face everywhere, and his songs. this one concert connects them but only for a second.
nj blinks and the concert is almost at its end, jk gone off for the final 5 minute break. when he comes back it's to a beautiful dance. nj marvels at how amazing he is, jk can do everything, even make water dance.
in his ending ment jk thanks all the fans for being there, that he hopes they all find true happiness and love, that they stay with him to the end.
then he notices a sign in the audience about abs, and flashes off his toned stomach to the crowds. this time even yg screams.
then he notices a sign in the audience about abs, and flashes off his toned stomach to the crowds. this time even yg screams.
the concert finishes, the livestream coming to an abrupt stop as fans get up from their seats and start leaving.
"what should we do?" hs asks quietly, the 6 of them shuffling a little out of the way to let fans pass them by.
nj shrugs, he feels so empty.
"what should we do?" hs asks quietly, the 6 of them shuffling a little out of the way to let fans pass them by.
nj shrugs, he feels so empty.
"maybe there's a chance you'll see him?" sj says, none of them moving. the rains still coming down, they're still drenched like rats.
nj feels frozen. he shakes his head. "that won't happen. that only happens in movies. don't be silly."
nj feels frozen. he shakes his head. "that won't happen. that only happens in movies. don't be silly."
and yet still nj can't move. just watches as the fans pass, their faces full of love, awe & laughter, all of them chattering with only one name on their lips. jk.
nj closes his eyes. thinking about how good it would be to see him, even if it was only yesterday that they'd parted.
nj closes his eyes. thinking about how good it would be to see him, even if it was only yesterday that they'd parted.
nj stares up at the stars, feeling the Busan breeze on his face. he focuses on the rain, landing on his cheeks, his clothes soaked.
if he focuses just that little bit more, he can almost hear jk speaking to him, calling out his name.
"NAMJOON?" nj eyes blink open.
if he focuses just that little bit more, he can almost hear jk speaking to him, calling out his name.
"NAMJOON?" nj eyes blink open.
he hears the rest of the boys gasping, and nj looks up in surprise. there jk is, his head poking out of a black van with tinted windows.
his eyes are wide, confused, perplexed.
"what are you all doing here? and why are you all soaking?!"
his eyes are wide, confused, perplexed.
"what are you all doing here? and why are you all soaking?!"
sj stares back at jk, gaping. "what are we doing here? what are YOU doing here?!"
jk's jaw drops. "i... i just had a concert?" he asks, biting his lip.
"we know." sj says. "you're a very good dancer."
jk's jaw drops. "i... i just had a concert?" he asks, biting his lip.
"we know." sj says. "you're a very good dancer."
"oh." then jks eyes widen again. "OH?!" he gulps, staring at nj. "you saw...?"nj coughs, nodding. none of them have the heart to tell them technically watched it via an illegal stream.
"uh..." jk leans over, opening the van door. "it's a 7 seater, get in please out of the rain."
"uh..." jk leans over, opening the van door. "it's a 7 seater, get in please out of the rain."
they all race towards the car, splashing into puddles. jm gets there first, doing a running jump towards jk, hugging him close.
jk is blushing as he accepts the hug, not even bothered about the 6 of them dripping with rain. nj is last to enter, his movements frozen.
jk is blushing as he accepts the hug, not even bothered about the 6 of them dripping with rain. nj is last to enter, his movements frozen.
a staff member helps fold njs bike up & store it in the trunk. then he gets in, settled next to jm who's still hugging jks arm.
"why are you guys here?" jk asks, as the car starts up again. nj notices the way his eyes aren't shining as normal, not hopeful as he glances nj's way.
"why are you guys here?" jk asks, as the car starts up again. nj notices the way his eyes aren't shining as normal, not hopeful as he glances nj's way.
"we were in the neighbourhood." yg says, noticing njs apprehension. nj holds his breath, catching jks eye. jk makes the slightest of movement, the softest nod. hopefully nj conveys the message that he wants to speak, in private.
"i'll book you guys to the hotel i'm staying at."
"i'll book you guys to the hotel i'm staying at."
"you don't need to do that!" nj finds his voice at last. "we don't wanna inconvenience you."
"nj." jk blinks. "you're dripping, have mud splatters all over you? it's been raining for hours. what'd you do-bike all the way to busan?"
"HAH!" hs belts. "wouldn't that have been funny"
"nj." jk blinks. "you're dripping, have mud splatters all over you? it's been raining for hours. what'd you do-bike all the way to busan?"
"HAH!" hs belts. "wouldn't that have been funny"
jk doesn't take no for an answer, soon enough the van stops at the fanciest hotel nj has ever seen - well except for the lotto hotel at gangnam.
the 6 of them follow jk like lost puppies, the desk handing over 6 room keys for the each of them.
the 6 of them follow jk like lost puppies, the desk handing over 6 room keys for the each of them.
nj can't deny - a shower does sound so good right now. but... so does jk.
nj means... so does speaking with jk... obviously.
nj means... so does speaking with jk... obviously.
but jk won't catch his eye, as they all make their way to the lift. all the rooms are on the top floor, something the others gape at and squeal.
they all but run to their rooms, and nj imagines they scream at the hugeness of the rooms, but the walls and doors must be soundproof.
they all but run to their rooms, and nj imagines they scream at the hugeness of the rooms, but the walls and doors must be soundproof.
"um..." nj hugs his sopping wet jacket close to his chest. jk stands in front of his door, hugging his own arms to his chest. they stare at each other, neither moving. "i..." nj coughs. why is he getting so nervous. "i imagine you must be tired, after your concert?"
"uh..." jk fiddles with his hotel key, blushing lightly. "yeah. i guess i am."
of course jk is. nj couldn't even remember how long it was, how long jk must have been jumping & dancing for. he must be exhausted. nj can't keep him up. he needs to rest.
nj nods. "ok, night."
of course jk is. nj couldn't even remember how long it was, how long jk must have been jumping & dancing for. he must be exhausted. nj can't keep him up. he needs to rest.
nj nods. "ok, night."
he throws the door open, flashing jk what he hopes is a friendly smile before he slams the door shut.
nj collapses against it, closing his eyes. stupid stupid stupid!!! why can't he think properly around jk?!
but what's done is done. he'll have time to speak to jk tomorrow.
nj collapses against it, closing his eyes. stupid stupid stupid!!! why can't he think properly around jk?!
but what's done is done. he'll have time to speak to jk tomorrow.
he only now looks at the room and his jaw drops in shock. it's not a room. it's like a house within a room, he counts at least 6 doors, a huge plush looking sofa, a mini bar and fridge, outstanding windows and red stain curtains. he can't even imagine how much this cost.
he begins to peel off his soaked clothes, grateful that the hotel provides wonderfully soft fluffy bathrobes.
just as he's putting on the complimentary slippers, the door knocks.
just as he's putting on the complimentary slippers, the door knocks.
that can't be jk? can it? no. definitely not. but just in case... nj runs to the mirror, checking he's got nothing in his teeth, his hair looks good, he looks good. he loosens the bathrobe slightly, bit of his chest peeking out. deep breath. he opens the door, trying not to pose.
"what on earth are you doing?" tae stares him, pulling a face.
"n-nothing!" nj gapes, trying to cover his chest. "what are you doing here!"
tae holds a mug in his hands, sipping it loudly.
nj stares back, trying not to blush. "i was getting ready for bed!"
"/uhuh/."
"n-nothing!" nj gapes, trying to cover his chest. "what are you doing here!"
tae holds a mug in his hands, sipping it loudly.
nj stares back, trying not to blush. "i was getting ready for bed!"
"/uhuh/."
"fuck off" nj groans, slapping his hands over his eyes.
tae cackles. "you have my blessing, i swear."
"stop!" nj groans, face red.
"i want him as a brother in law-"
"tae!"
tae grins. "look, i just wanted to say i'm proud of you. you know that right?"
"that's sweet of you."
tae cackles. "you have my blessing, i swear."
"stop!" nj groans, face red.
"i want him as a brother in law-"
"tae!"
tae grins. "look, i just wanted to say i'm proud of you. you know that right?"
"that's sweet of you."
"yeah well, now i'm back to the annoying brother now."
"what a relief."
tae waves, saluting. "night hyung."
nj closes the door again. the rain's still hard against the window, njs glad he's inside. he starts walking to the bathroom when tae knocks again.
nj opens it with a groan-
"what a relief."
tae waves, saluting. "night hyung."
nj closes the door again. the rain's still hard against the window, njs glad he's inside. he starts walking to the bathroom when tae knocks again.
nj opens it with a groan-
"will you just go to bed?!"
jk blinks at him, his hand still raised against the door. "oh." he takes a shakey step back. "ok. night."
jk blinks at him, his hand still raised against the door. "oh." he takes a shakey step back. "ok. night."
nj feels like kingkong, about to knock down a building. he pratically leaps towards jk before he can turn fully away. "shit no wait!" he bites his lip as jk turns to face him again. "i thought you were tae. i'm relieved that you're not. and um i'm happy it's you."
"um, thank you."
jk stands there not moving, he eventually lowers his fist.
"do you want to come in...?" nk squeaks, opening the door.
jks eyes soften. "is that - is it ok if i do?"
"of course" nj nods.
jk smells of strawberries as he walks past, and nj shuts the door.
jk stands there not moving, he eventually lowers his fist.
"do you want to come in...?" nk squeaks, opening the door.
jks eyes soften. "is that - is it ok if i do?"
"of course" nj nods.
jk smells of strawberries as he walks past, and nj shuts the door.
"i." jk bites at his bottom lip. "i didn't expect to see you here. in busan? not that i'm saying i'm not happy to see you- because i am. a lot. i just... i want to know if i'm overanalysing here? i... why are you here?"
"i wanted to talk you."
jk blinks. "so you came to busan?"
"i wanted to talk you."
jk blinks. "so you came to busan?"
nj nods, and then jk gasps. he brings a hand up to his mouth, gaping wide at him.
"your bicycle...? joon you didn't - you didn't ride all the way here?"
nj shakes his head. "well. we went in ygs car at first, then there were some issues. so - i did end up cycling the rest."
"your bicycle...? joon you didn't - you didn't ride all the way here?"
nj shakes his head. "well. we went in ygs car at first, then there were some issues. so - i did end up cycling the rest."
"how long did that take you oh my god?" jk huffs, his cheeks pink. "no wonder you had mud all over you. and dried sweat."
njs throat burns. "it took like... 3? maybe and a half hours...?"
jks jaw drops. "all that way?! what the fuck!" nj nods, and jk stares at him. "but.. why?"
njs throat burns. "it took like... 3? maybe and a half hours...?"
jks jaw drops. "all that way?! what the fuck!" nj nods, and jk stares at him. "but.. why?"
... isn't that the question of the century?
why did he do this?
"because of you," nj says. "because a boy told me he was just a boy, asking for a 2nd chance and i... i couldn't leave things the way they did."
"joon..." jk's eyes are so wide, nj is afraid he'll fall in them.
why did he do this?
"because of you," nj says. "because a boy told me he was just a boy, asking for a 2nd chance and i... i couldn't leave things the way they did."
"joon..." jk's eyes are so wide, nj is afraid he'll fall in them.
not that he'd mind though, falling into jks eyes.
nj coughs as he takes a step forward. "i... i thought we should talk - properly. honestly. i'm not saying i forgive what you did but - i want to try."
nj coughs as he takes a step forward. "i... i thought we should talk - properly. honestly. i'm not saying i forgive what you did but - i want to try."
jks eyes are watery as he nods, his tattoed hand coming up to brush through his hair. "i don't... why would you even want to? after what i did? the way i hurt you so bad?" nj wants so badly to hold him. "you deserve so much and i -- i'm not... i don't deserve to be happy."
njs mind is whirring as he speaks. "i don't deserve anything, jk-ah. i'm not perfect - and i realise now that you're not perfect either."
jks eyes are red, he blinks away tears. "i'm so far from perfect."
"but that's ok. neither of us are. we're both just human."
jks eyes are red, he blinks away tears. "i'm so far from perfect."
"but that's ok. neither of us are. we're both just human."
jk nods. "okay. what... what do we do now?"
"i like you, jk-ah."
nj wants to flush under jks gaze, the way his cheeks redden and his eyes turn wide. "you do?"
"yeah - of course i do. i just rode almost 4 hours on a bike, in the rain, to see you."
"i like you, jk-ah."
nj wants to flush under jks gaze, the way his cheeks redden and his eyes turn wide. "you do?"
"yeah - of course i do. i just rode almost 4 hours on a bike, in the rain, to see you."
"i like you too, nj-hyung. so much. a lot."
nj smiles. wow. under the hotel lights, jk looks the softest nj has ever seen him.
"but... i have my world tour. i'm leaving the country in 2 days. i can cancel it-"
"no, don't." nj shakes his head. "you can't do that to your fans."
nj smiles. wow. under the hotel lights, jk looks the softest nj has ever seen him.
"but... i have my world tour. i'm leaving the country in 2 days. i can cancel it-"
"no, don't." nj shakes his head. "you can't do that to your fans."
"we can take this slow. learn about each other. if you want to."
jks lip quirks upwards. "of course i want to. so... we're friends?"
"a lot more than friends," nj confirms. "but since you're leaving we probably shouldnt..."
"fuck?"
"yeah," nj coughs. "at least, not yet."
jks lip quirks upwards. "of course i want to. so... we're friends?"
"a lot more than friends," nj confirms. "but since you're leaving we probably shouldnt..."
"fuck?"
"yeah," nj coughs. "at least, not yet."
"it makes sense." jk agrees, not hiding the way he stares at njs chest. "i don't want us to rush either."
"i really want this - us - to work. but you have to promise me you'll be open - about your feelings, about what you want?"
jk nods. "i know. and i'm sorry. i've never..."
"i really want this - us - to work. but you have to promise me you'll be open - about your feelings, about what you want?"
jk nods. "i know. and i'm sorry. i've never..."
"that day, at your apartment. i was with this guy and he... charmed me, made me feel safe, comfortable. i was terrified it was happening all over again. i like you so much and it scares me - but it's a good feeling, i don't know how to describe it."
nj does - it's like falling. it's like falling and the wind is on your face, breath leaving your body, and maybe you should be scared but then the clouds clear and you see the horizon. and you realise you're falling, but something's holding you, keeping you safe.
nj offers jk a drink from the minibar and then the two of them sip nervously at their drinks, sitting close on the sofa but not touching.
half way through his drink nj asks. "can you tell me something about yourself? maybe from when you were young? something no one else knows."
half way through his drink nj asks. "can you tell me something about yourself? maybe from when you were young? something no one else knows."
nj blushes, sipping his drink again. "i want to get to know you, learn things. if that's alright."
jk nods, tapping his pinkie against his glass as he thinks. "sure. well - i... - i was born here."
"in busan?"
"yeah. i used to hate it, the beach, the sand."
jk nods, tapping his pinkie against his glass as he thinks. "sure. well - i... - i was born here."
"in busan?"
"yeah. i used to hate it, the beach, the sand."
"i..." jk breathes out, turning to nj now, their legs touching. "i didn't always want to be a singer, you know? in fact i didn't know what i'd be when i 'grew up'... i thought maybe a banker or a fisherman. i had no real dream, or passion. until something happened."
"one day i saw this video of a rapper. i can't even remember now how i came across it." jk smiles, staring at his glass. "he was tall, a little awkward filming himself but - he was so cool. had so much talent, i knew then that it was what i wanted to do."
"i watched the video like... a billion times, i crushed on him so bad. but he never posted again. i thought maybe... if i became a singer, if i followed in his footsteps maybe i'd find him again. but," jk shrugs, knocking back the rest of his drink. "i never did."
nj can hardly breathe. "do you... remember the name?"
jk nods. "of course i do!" he snorts, laughing. "he was RM." jk lets out a sigh, leaning back fully against the sofa, wriggling his bum until he's comfortable. "it's actually pretty funny. you sorta reminded me of him."
jk nods. "of course i do!" he snorts, laughing. "he was RM." jk lets out a sigh, leaning back fully against the sofa, wriggling his bum until he's comfortable. "it's actually pretty funny. you sorta reminded me of him."
"you know at the bookstore? i had ran into the first store i looked at, there was paparazzi and i panicked. and then i saw you and i was like. wow. then i met you again only hours later with the matcha incident. and then... i kept thinking of RM. that was why i kissed you.
i.. you reminded me of something so warm and exciting. and i couldn't help it but kiss you. i still feel it, hyung." jk says, placing a hand over his heart. "it's like you're home - always have been."
"jk.." nj croaks, interrupting him.
"yeah?"
"it was me."
jk tilts his head to the side. "what was?"
nj swallows, putting his glass down. "RM. that was why you thought we were similar. i am him. or.. i was anyways."
it takes jk 2 seconds, and then he's falling off the sofa.
"yeah?"
"it was me."
jk tilts his head to the side. "what was?"
nj swallows, putting his glass down. "RM. that was why you thought we were similar. i am him. or.. i was anyways."
it takes jk 2 seconds, and then he's falling off the sofa.
https://twitter.com/jaffakoo/status/1641051878401163269?s=20ready for final update?
jk almost squawks as he hits the floor.
"shit. are you okay?!" nj asks, reaching over to try and pick jk up by his shoulders.
jk stares at him, his cheeks the reddest he's ever seen. "no!" jk moans, hiding his face with his hands, the tips of his ears are pink. "YOU'RE RM?!"
"shit. are you okay?!" nj asks, reaching over to try and pick jk up by his shoulders.
jk stares at him, his cheeks the reddest he's ever seen. "no!" jk moans, hiding his face with his hands, the tips of his ears are pink. "YOU'RE RM?!"
"i...!" jk gets up shakily, grabbing onto nj's hand. "i'm meeting my... my idol right now! give me a second to breathe!"
nj can't help but sneeze out a laugh, rubbing at his neck a little shy. "it was only one song."
jk nods, eyes ablaze. "that one song - it changed my life."
nj can't help but sneeze out a laugh, rubbing at his neck a little shy. "it was only one song."
jk nods, eyes ablaze. "that one song - it changed my life."
nj cheeks burn under jks adoring stare. "i- thanks."
"do you um... do you mind me asking why you only did just the one?"
"ah. i don't know. it was a dream, writing & rapping songs. it felt pretty unreachable at the time. life sort of got in the way. i don't regret it though."
"do you um... do you mind me asking why you only did just the one?"
"ah. i don't know. it was a dream, writing & rapping songs. it felt pretty unreachable at the time. life sort of got in the way. i don't regret it though."
"i'm glad you did it!" jk smiles, cheeks still rose red. "you inspired me, you helped me realise a dream i hadn't even thought about before. you know what this means now, right?"
nj shakes his head.
"it means i'm going to spend my whole life trying to show you how thankful i am."
nj shakes his head.
"it means i'm going to spend my whole life trying to show you how thankful i am."
nj breaks out into a smile. "your whole life, huh?"
"is that too... soon for me to say? that i'm thinking long term?"
"absolutely not." nj plants a kiss on jks head, hiding his smile & blush in jks hair. "not too soon at all. i'm thinking long term too."
"forever?"
"forever."
"is that too... soon for me to say? that i'm thinking long term?"
"absolutely not." nj plants a kiss on jks head, hiding his smile & blush in jks hair. "not too soon at all. i'm thinking long term too."
"forever?"
"forever."
they talk until the sun rises, giggling as birds singing, learning about each other as the sun rises over busan's oceans.
they fall asleep on the sofa, holding each other in their arms, listening to their hearts beating softly. the closest thing they did was nj kissing jks hair,
they fall asleep on the sofa, holding each other in their arms, listening to their hearts beating softly. the closest thing they did was nj kissing jks hair,
but this is so intimate, in a way nj has never felt or experienced before. jk so soft, warm against him. his heart feels so full, the thought of forever with jk.
maybe there will be rough times ahead - jk still has to go on his world tour - but nj is happy, excited for forever.
maybe there will be rough times ahead - jk still has to go on his world tour - but nj is happy, excited for forever.
the next day nj doesn't see jk much, he's busy with his team, talking over plans about the upcoming tour.
the 6 of them lounge and relax at the hotel, soaking up the Busan sun on the balconies, drinking champagne. when jk comes back they play games, talk, laughing into the night
the 6 of them lounge and relax at the hotel, soaking up the Busan sun on the balconies, drinking champagne. when jk comes back they play games, talk, laughing into the night
when jk has to leave for his flight to japan he receives 5 amazing hyung hugs and one soft, intimate squeeze. nj kisses the top of his head again and jk feels the happiest he's felt in a long time. nj whispers a "see you soon" into his skin. jks tour will take 6 months.
they keep in contact, messaging almost every day. nj keeps jk updated on the boys shenanigans and jk sends him pictures from all around the world. and (maybe occasionally) they send each other a thirst trap every now and then... which maybe... leads to... other things 👅📱🍆💦
jk gets asked on national television if he's seeing someone, and jk says yes. it's early days, but there is a special guy who makes his heart swoop.
jk has to change his tour plans when one of the stadiums booking falls through, he has to miss helsinki altogether and go on to the next country. nj can tell jk is pretty upset about, jk calls him saying helsinki had always been on his bucket list - now he wouldn't be able to go.
"we'll go together one day," nj says, wishing he could hug jk through the phone.
jk sniffles, hugging a pillow to his chest. it's 3am for nj but he doesn't care.
"yeah. we'll do everything we want to. the guys can come too - if you wanted."
"that sounds nice," jk smiles.
jk sniffles, hugging a pillow to his chest. it's 3am for nj but he doesn't care.
"yeah. we'll do everything we want to. the guys can come too - if you wanted."
"that sounds nice," jk smiles.
when jks tour finishes the 6 of them meet him at the airport, hugging him close. jk starts crying and he shyly admits he used to see people hug in the airport & was always jeaous - he never had someone to hug.
"you do now," yg smiles, ruffling jks hair.
"you do now," yg smiles, ruffling jks hair.
nj kisses jk later that night, after the 7 have gone out for samgyeopsal followed by bowling.
kissing jk is always mesmerising but it feels like he hasn't held jk like this in so long. he smells like fresh linen, and his lips have a soft, cherry taste. nj can't stop kissing him.
kissing jk is always mesmerising but it feels like he hasn't held jk like this in so long. he smells like fresh linen, and his lips have a soft, cherry taste. nj can't stop kissing him.
they fall onto the sofa (just like last time), clothes thrown somewhere nearby. the kisses are everything, they breathe 'i missed you' into each others skin, soaking up as much of the other as they can. jk asks nj to fuck him, nj nods so fast he's dizzy. jk never stops smiling.
jk fucks nj next time. and doesn't stop preening about the fact that nj is rm, his one and only inspiration, his love.
they move in together a few months down the line, when jk annouces he's taking a step back from singing to focus on other passions he's found over time.
they move in together a few months down the line, when jk annouces he's taking a step back from singing to focus on other passions he's found over time.
and then they go to helsinki, all 7 of them.
and jk has never travelled somewhere before with friends. they play uno in the kitchen which gets incredinly competitive, goofing around as they shop in supermarkets.
and jk has never travelled somewhere before with friends. they play uno in the kitchen which gets incredinly competitive, goofing around as they shop in supermarkets.
nj and jk go on a cute cafe date, getting cake and hot chocolate and all kinds of sweet treats.
it's perfect, perfect, perfect.
it's perfect, perfect, perfect.
the next day, jk posts a video on his accounts.
the end!!!!!🏃
ko-fi.com/jaffakoo thank you guys so much for loving this!! i didn't expect it! <3
https://twitter.com/jaffakoo/status/1641051878401163269link to top of au!💜🥰
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