Share this page!

Enter Twitter Thread URL to Unroll

Needs to be the full URL like: https://twitter.com/threadreaderapp/status/1644127596119195649

How to get URL link on Twitter App

  1. On the Twitter thread, click on or icon on the bottom
  2. Click again on or Share Via icon
  3. Click on Copy Link to Tweet
  4. Paste it above and click "Unroll Thread"!
  5. More info at Twitter Help
Liz Dye Profile picture
@5DollarFeminist
Apr 13 • 22 tweets • 8 min read Twitter logo Read on Twitter
Scrolly
I just finished reading Trump's insane clown LOLsuit against Michael Cohen and ... honestly I'm gobsmacked.

I read Trump lawsuits for a living. That is my IRL job.

And I just ... WHAT THE EVERLOVING F---???
storage.courtlistener.com/recap/gov.usco…
A real lawyer put his name on it. Not even as local counsel for one of Trump's merry band of nitwit JDs.

But, nope! Total rancid word salad.

Trump's real lawyer ➡️ britopllc.com/alejandro-brit…

Dog vomit ⬇️ It is against equity and go...
Why is Miami the appropriate venue for this case?

Because you can buy Cohen's book there and download his podcast.

And maybe when Cohen was representing Trump, he flew into Miami. You know ... upon information and belief.

(FL is not the appropriate venue.) Image
I am suing Michael Cohen for breaching attorney-client privilege and talking smack about me, his onetime client, which is a breach of fiduciary duty.

Here are three pages of Cohen's onetime lawyer Robert Costello talking smack about him, which is totally fine.
"Individual 1" relying on Robert Mueller to dirty up Michael Cohen is A CHOICE. In connection with Defendan...
Does breach of NY Rules of Professional Conduct for lawyers create a private cause of action?

The guy is already disbarred, but, hey, knock yourself out. Image
You breached attorney-client privilege by telling dirty lies about me!

(Also, this looks uncannily like my dog.) ImageImage
Breach of contract is when you host people who say mean things about me on your podcast.

Yes, that is the law. No, I will not be taking questions at this time. ImageImage
I only including Trump saying this suit covers anything Cohen MIGHT SAY IN THE FUTURE because he made the opposite argument in the E. Jean Carroll case.

Trump repeated the Carroll defamation years later, got sued again, and claimed he was just commenting on pending litigation. Any further statements or d...
Or maybe he was doing journalism.

No, I'm not kidding. (Told you, this is my job.)
abovethelaw.com/2023/02/trump-…
Okay, so the causes of action are #1 breach of fiduciary duty by violating NY attorney conduct rules and divulging A-C materials.

No the contract doesn't point to any specific disclosure.

Just, you know, vibes, man. FIRST CAUSE OF ACTION (Brea...
#2, breach of contract because he violated the confidentiality agreement with the Trump Org.

No, that NDA is not attached.

Yes, it has been struck down in other forums.
thedailybeast.com/donald-trumps-… Image
#3, same as #2, just wearing Groucho glasses and smoking a cigar THIRD CAUSE OF ACTION (Brea...
#4, unjust enrichment

Which is AMAZING coming from a guy who sold NFTs of himself at the White House.

Remember that time when Melania missed the Jan 6 coup because she was busy at the WH photographing the place for her coffee table book? Image
#5, conversion

Okay, this is going to take some unpacking.

See, in 2015, Trump sent Cohen to rig an online poll. Cohen hired this IT guy from Liberty University and promised him $50K to do it.

But when the guy showed up asking for the money, Cohen didn't pay him in full. Image
Instead he gave the guy $12-13K in cash, plus a single boxing glove he claimed had been worn by a Brazilian MMA fighter.

But he charged Trump the full $50K for it.

Don't look at me like that. I didn't make it up!
wsj.com/articles/poll-…
Astute observers will note that this passage appears to admit the allegations in the pending Bragg indictment about Trump knowingly reimbursing Cohen for rigging a candidate poll — something which was unambiguously a campaign expense.

Whoopsie daisy! Image
Also that Trump knowingly paid Cohen to reimburse him for the tax liability and called it a retainer.

¯\_(ツ)_/¯ ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ Image
Whatever, it's not like DA Bragg is ever going to see this complaint, right?

The important thing is that Michael Cohen owes Trump $500 million for calling him a racist and breaching attorney client privilege by telling unspecified lies. Image
The case was filed in the Southern District of Florida, Miami division.

(So, not Cannon or Middlebrooks.)

As yet unassigned, but ... I see one or two minor problems, whichever lucky jurist gets blessed with this $402 bag of dogsh-t.
courtlistener.com/docket/6717587…
Girl, same
And this offensively stupid case is assigned to Judge Darrin Gayles.

LOL forever.
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Darrin_P.…

• • •

Missing some Tweet in this thread? You can try to force a refresh
　

Keep Current with Liz Dye

Liz Dye Profile picture

Stay in touch and get notified when new unrolls are available from this author!

Read all threads

This Thread may be Removed Anytime!

PDF

Twitter may remove this content at anytime! Save it as PDF for later use!

Try unrolling a thread yourself!

how to unroll video
  1. Follow @ThreadReaderApp to mention us!

  2. From a Twitter thread mention us with a keyword "unroll"
@threadreaderapp unroll

Practice here first or read more on our help page!

More from @5DollarFeminist

Liz Dye Profile picture
Jan 20
Judge Middlebrooks is PISSED

Sanctions order in the Trump RICO LOLsuit against Hillary Clinton and half of DC

storage.courtlistener.com/recap/gov.usco… Image
Ho. Lee. Shit. Image
"Thus, while a litigant’s conduct in other cases would normally not be relevant, when the court is faced with a sanctions motion against a repeat offender, undeterred by admonitions, it has the authority to consider that litigant’s outside conduct." Image
Read 7 tweets
Liz Dye Profile picture
Dec 1, 2022
"This appeal requires us to consider whether the district court had jurisdiction to block the United States from using lawfully seized records in a criminal investigation. The answer is no."

BOOM.
media.ca11.uscourts.gov/opinions/pub/f…
"We are faced with a choice: apply our usual test; drastically expand availability of equitable jurisdiction for every subject of a search warrant; or carve out an unprecedented exception for former presidents. We choose the first option. So the case must be dismissed."
"Now, with the benefit of oral argument, we conclude that the district court lacked jurisdiction to consider Plaintiff’s initial motion or to issue any orders in response to it."

Bye bye special master Judge Dearie. Also the remaining shreds of Judge Cannon's reputation.
Read 12 tweets
Liz Dye Profile picture
Dec 1, 2022
Kari Lake's lawyers, including Alan Dershowitz, just got sanctioned for filing a garbage election lawsuit.
storage.courtlistener.com/recap/gov.usco…
Is it good when the judge describes your case as "mere conjectural claims of potential injuries" and says, while that's fine for TV and social media, "Rule 11 requires more?"

It seems kinda bad.
OUCH, that's gonna leave a mark. As discussed herein, any objectively reasonable investigatio
Read 4 tweets
Liz Dye Profile picture
Nov 22, 2022
The DOJ's appeal of Judge Aileen Cannon's imposition of a special master in the Mar-a-Lago case is beginning.

Sopan Joshi is up now for the government.

Panel is Judge Pryor and Judges Brasher and Grant, two Trump appointees who ruled in favor of the government in the last round
First question for Joshi is whether there has ever been an exercise of equitable-anomalous jurisdiction when the search was lawful.

There hasn't, and there's been no demonstrated need for the return of the materials.
Remember, the 4 Richey factors to justify jurisdiction are callous disregard of plaintiff's rights, plaintiff's individual interest in material seized, irreparably injury by denial of the return of the property; and whether the plaintiff has an adequate remedy at law.
Read 21 tweets
Liz Dye Profile picture
Nov 22, 2022
Trump just asked Judge Cannon to let him see the unredacted affidavit supporting the Mar-a-Lago search warrant.

storage.courtlistener.com/recap/gov.usco…
The filing is gonzo, as usual, characterizing routine criminal procedure as an outrageous abuse of government power. Image
How very dare the government ask Trump not to film the agents executing the warrant, ensuring that they'll be immediately doxxed and harassed?

We've been through this before with Magistrate Judge Bruce Reinhart, of course.
storage.courtlistener.com/recap/gov.usco… Image
Read 8 tweets
Liz Dye Profile picture
Nov 3, 2022
Trump says he's suing NY Attorney General Tish James in a local Florida court.

What, and I cannot stress this enough, the everloving fuck???
Okay, here's this dumb turkey of a lawsuit.

Spoiler Alert: It's DUMB.
documentcloud.org/documents/2325…
Grüß gott! Local Florida court has personal jurisdiction over the NYAG because she's "illegally" messing with Trump's revocable trust.
Read 25 tweets

Did Thread Reader help you today?

Support us! We are indie developers!

This site is made by just two indie developers on a laptop doing marketing, support and development! Read more about the story.

Become a Premium Member ($3/month or $30/year) and get exclusive features!

Become Premium

Don't want to be a Premium member but still want to support us?

Make a small donation by buying us coffee ($5) or help with server cost ($10)

Donate via Paypal

Or Donate anonymously using crypto!

Ethereum

0xfe58350B80634f60Fa6Dc149a72b4DFbc17D341E copy

Bitcoin

3ATGMxNzCUFzxpMCHL5sWSt4DVtS8UqXpi copy

Thank you for your support!

Follow Us on Twitter!

Send Email!

:(