Dr.N Profile picture
May 3 8 tweets 3 min read Twitter logo Read on Twitter
Every family needs a mission statement.
All the children should know it.
It should guide parenting decisions and frame conversations about identity.

One of the things my family aims for is to raise independent adults who are self-disciplined, brilliant and entrepreneurial.
To achieve this, I cannot do everything for my kids no matter how much I want to. The only way to develop self-discipline is to give children the opportunity to decide to do the right thing even when no one is watching.
I assign chores, make the older ones review homework
And teach them to be courteous to adults in my employ.
Sometimes, I would rather wash a dish myself. It would be faster and I would do a better job but I don't want to deny them the opportunity to improve.
Brilliance in my definition is to love knowledge. I set high standards
academically but never unrealistic ones. I reward good grades bc we put in the work. Above the grades, I'm interested in how the subject changes their approach to life.
If a kettle is on fire, how does science help us determine the water is at boiling point?
Discuss (10 marks)
If you score 100% in Science and can't answer that question, we're gonna have a problem.
The hallmark of a good entrepreneur is grit.
Grit can be defined as the persistence required to remain on course without public validation or reward.
One day my 5 year old came home sulking.
He said he never wanted to go to the playground again. When I asked why, he said there was no reason.
Eventually, he admitted someone had said something mean to him.
Now I felt like marching there and fighting for him but that is not seving our mission statement in any way.
The boy was a year older and did not hit him so I felt he should not have run away.
I told him to return to the playground & stand his ground.
He came home hours later.
Me: What did the boy say?
Him: He had left.
Me: 🙄
Also me: Did you have fun today?
Him: Yes. I scored a goal
Every family should base their parenting decisions on what kind of adults they plan to release into the society.
Don't leave things to chance.
Children are not weeds who grow by themselves unattended.
They are like lovely trees who require systematic nurturing.
#parenting101

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More from @Nenabekee

Apr 30
If you just got married or you have kids < 3 yrs I will share a good strategy you can use to make them passionate about the bible.
This is the age when kids are exposed to video games, cartoons, you tube sing alongs in order for parents to buy time for chores and work or Biz.
You can use this period to ignite in them an appetite for wholesome entertainment.
1. During car rides, play DVDs like Veggie tales, Donut man e.t.c.
2. Tell them one bible story every day. Keep it short and simple and use lots of dramatisation.
3. After Sunday school
Always ask what they were taught and what it means to them. Give rewards when they remember memory verses. Even 2 yr olds can remember simple phrases.
4. Buy them story books, picture books and wall art with Scriptures.
5. Teach them to pray. Once a child can speak, they can pray
Read 6 tweets
Feb 3, 2022
As a young girl me too I was chorusing "I will not marry a broke man!"
Each time we got dressed to go out my mom would shout "Ndi ji jeep biawa!" i.e men who drive SUVs should besiege my daughters.

When I met my husband he was a student who I prob had more pocket money than.
Here are the qualities of a rich man who doesn't have the money in the bank yet🤪🤪🤪
1. They are not intimidated by money. If he freaks out about certain sums of money, he's not ready.
2. They put the work in. They don't just talk a good game, they will take the most menial job
If that is what it takes. You cannot be prouding when your father did not leave you mansions.
3. They have a great attitude. If they get moody whenever money is low to the point of being down in the dumps, hmmm...
4. They are able to articulate their goals, plans and dreams
Read 10 tweets
Mar 2, 2021
I had been married about 1 year when we moved to Lagos. I was yet to get a new job and I had a baby so I was spending quite a bit of time at home.
One day, I remembered that "they" said you should get dressed up when your husband is coming home so that they will not be tempted
By the "Strange Woman"
I put on a nice outfit, did my hair and wore perfume.
When Hubs came in, I went to the door and posed.
Him: Are you going somewhere?
Me: No
Him: Sure?
Me: Yep
Him: So why???
Me: I just wanted to...
Him:
Him: But you're at home?
Me: I just wanted to look nice to welcome you.
Him: Hian!
Me: 🙈
Him: You're at home. You need to be comfortable. Relax abeg...

Me:
Read 5 tweets
Oct 6, 2020
Hearing "I love you" is not the same thing as feeling loved.
When you feel loved, the words need not be spoken before the goosebumps show up.
I had been a Christian for years and I said God loved me but I didn't feel it. I felt I was always missing the mark.
I couldn't breathe.
I had to confess my sins every 5 minutes in case rapture occurs.
I had to search my thoughts in case something funny was hiding there.
No matter how much I cleaned up, I never felt clean enough.
And then I found out that I had been taking soap to the soap factory
I stopped the scrubbing and learned to listen.
Every morning, when he wakes me up and says "Nnenna, I love you. You make me happy. You are my baby."
I don't begin to explain to him how wrong he is, how I couldn't possibly be his, how many mistakes I made the day before...
Read 6 tweets
Apr 21, 2020
Men are scum???

Dear Sis-in-Christ

Two months ago, I woke up with serious abdominal pains. I found out I had an ectopic pregnancy. 1st Gynae said, let's try to handle this medically. I was admitted and given medication. By Day 3, it was obvious it wasn't working.
Hubby says, it's time to move. So we go to a new Gynae. In 2 hours, I am being prepped for surgery.
Before we stepped out of our car, he and I held hands and declared I was going to walk out of the hospital healed. As I am wheeled into the theatre, I know he is out there
Not googling porn, not guzzling drinks to calm his nerves or pacing because he needs a "fix" but interceding.
The nurses asked him to go home, we have 4 kids after all. He insists on staying till I come out of anaesthesia.
This is despite the fact that it's an excellent facility
Read 8 tweets
Dec 21, 2019
Master class with a pastor. He mentions how he went with a team to a slum in Lagos that had been plagued by a water-borne disease because they did not have potable water. They had offered to dig a borehole for them and were joyously permitted.
The "youth" accosted them to demand
A Bribe on the day of execution.
He poses the question to us
"What would you do? Pay the Bribe or Call off the intervention?"
The class was divided.
Some spirikokos said they would start to pray.
Others said they would negotiate. Pastor said the youth started getting
Restive, threatening to harm the team by this time.
Others were like "I don't go where I'm not wanted. Just take my team home"
This would be safer but a lot of money had gone into paying the contractors and could not be recovered. Besides the women and children who needed help
Read 7 tweets

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