Thread by @undeadbiscuit

#sangyaoFES thread fic time!
Note: I have a vague outline but I'm mostly making this up as I go, so it'll get posted in chunks.
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Considering it was both his first public appearance since the funer- *his ascension*, **and** the first inter-sect conference since the same,

Nie Huaisang was holding up surprisingly well under the scrutiny of the other sects. He was still pale and underweight from his period of mourning and he seemed to still be somewhat mentally distant -never *quite* looking *at* anyone, just the space they were occupying-

but he had participated in all the formal introductions and the gift-giving to the hosting Jin sect and even the required toasts near-flawlessly.

After months of checking in on his mental and emotional state, it seemed Jin Guangyao had been overly concerned.

Or so he thought

until the dull roar of the chatter and clinking plates and cups throughout the banquet hall began to die down.

Gently shooing away the maid who had come to ask him about whether or not to switch the type of wine yet, he turned to find that, gradually, more and more people were

stopping eating or conversing to stare in the direction of the Nie delegation's seats.

Or, more specifically, to stare at *Nie Huaisang,* who was sitting stone still, chopsticks still held in an upheld hand-

and silent tears slowly trickling from widened green eyes as he

stared at the plate and bowls on the tray in front of him.

+

As he and most of the other occupants of the room watched, the Nie sect's new second in command put a hand on his leader's shoulder.

Startled out of his trance, Nie Huaisang's head jerked up as if he was a spooked deer, the tears streaking his face and lingering in his eyes

glittering in the light of the lanters and candle torches positioned all around the room and soft mouth opening on a gasp.

Jin Guangyao was very sure he was not imagining the collective inhale all around the room, and his hands clenched in his sleeves.

Unlike most of the

guests and hosts in attendance, he had known of the vast and stark difference between Nie Huaisang's dramatics and his genuine distress for years. It had been a secret Nie Huaisang himself had let him in on, the way he used one to hide the other.

And now *someone* on their

staff had blown that secret open, and it seemed the wolves were scenting blood.

"Ah- I'm sorry," Nie Huaisang was mumbling as he checked his sleeves for a handkerchief to wipe his eyes. "Haha, how embarrassing- on the first meeting-"

Jin Guangyao noticed a few people starting

to lean forward in their seats at rapt attention.

That his father was one of them made rage and disgust bloom in his chest like the peony embroidered on his clothing.

As he made his way, unnoticed, around the room to Nis Huaisang's side of the table, it seemed the Nie disciples

had noticed the change in the air as well, judging by the way some of them began shuffling closer to their sect leader, eyes sharp and metaphorical hackles raising.

+

Once he was close enough to see the tray's contents, the source of Nie Huaisang's distress was immediately apparent.

Jin Guangyao had expressly directed the kitchens to prepare braised pork belly with mustard greens, mushrooms, and wheat noodles, wanting to give Nie Huaisang

something comforting.

Instead, the center bowl held spicy beef and venison stew with glass noodles and eggplant.

One of Nie Mingjue's favorites.

In fact, it was what he'd ordered to be prepared during the last banquet the man had ever attended, looking to appease his

increasingly volatile temper.

It could have been a simple mistake. Someone getting their notes crossed.

Or, he thought, restraining himself from glancing in his father's direction, it could have been deliberate. A cruel point to be made.

Either way, he would find out *later*.+

"Xiansheng," he interjected politely to the second in command, keeping his voice soft enough that it wouldn't echo in the near-silent hall, "Perhaps it would be best for Nie-zongzhu to be escorted back to his room for a little peace and quiet to recover."

The second, a man with

whom he'd never actually been *friends*, but had shared a mutually respectful relationship when other disciples had been much more condescending and rude, glanced around at all the staring spectators, then nodded and reached out to take hold of Nie Huaisang's wrist to stop his

increasingly anxious searching.

A soft wave of murmured gossip went up at the gesture -more likely than not at the difference in size between the seconds hand and the wrist he held- and Jin Guangyao bit his tongue to keep his ire from becoming evident in his expression.

This vulnerability was something that belonged to him more than anyone else, even Nie Huaisang's own sect. He would not share it with the likes of anyone in this room.

Not even Er-ge.

"Lingyun, go with them," the second said, and one of the other disciples, a young man with

a serious face but a bright gaze, saluted and stood.

"It- it's fine," Nie Huaisang said, his voice still faint and unsteady. "I'll be alright with San-ge, you don't need to go hungry on my account."

As the second had done before, this 'Lingyun' directed a distrustful glance

towards the crowd. "I do not mind half a meal. But if Zongzhu prefers it, I will return to the hall once Zongzhu has been settled."

That seemed to be a good enough answer.

+

When Jin Guangyao held out a hand, Nie Huaisang accepted the offered assistance, and once he was on his feet, the second let him go so the younger disciple could step in on his other side.

The movement broke the spell that had fallen over the room, and as the two of them quickly

herded Nie Huaisang out before anyone could raise a protest to his leaving, Jin Guangyao could feel many spiteful glares spearing into his back.

For once, he didn't care. Enjoyed it, even. Let them all chug vinegar that *he* was the one Nie Huaisang trusted to care for him while

in such a state, rather than any of them.

As they wound their way through the mostly empty halls, Nie Huaisang made a soft, wounded noise and leaned against him. "San-ge, I'm sorry," he murmured, audibly trying to restrain himself from breaking down again. "I swore I wasn't

going to make a fool of myself this trip."

Jin Guangyao put an arm around his waist to steady him and, once their escort said nothing about it, gave him a reassuring squeeze.

"It's not your fault," he said soothingly. "If anyone should apologize, it's me. I was sure I'd

ordered a different dish for you, but-"

Nie Huaisang gave a small shake of his head, and though he made no verbal response, it was clear by his body language that he wasn't holding Jin Guangyao responsible for the error.

Good.

A maid met them at the door of Nie Huaisang's room

and bowed. "Will Nie-zongzhu be requiring anything from the infirmary or kitchens?"

"Chrysanthemum and wolfberry tea," Jin Guangyao said. "And something easy to eat that does *not* have beef or venison."

She bowed again and bustled off towards the kitchens.

Once she had

disappeared around the corner, Nie Huaisang gently patted his disciple on the arm. "You can go back to dinner now."

Lingyun looked at his sect leader's still-unsteady hand, expression tightening in concern, but nodded and bowed. "By your leave," he said, then turned to go.

+

Once they were inside the room and the door was closed behind them, Nie Huaisang turned to rest his forehead against Jin Guangyao's shoulder. "San-ge..."

"Shh." Jin Guangyao reached up and unfastened the younger man's guan, then began unpinning

the bun of braids to let them fall.

The simple act of removing the most obvious sign of the sect leader position seemed to also remove the last of the anxious tension Nie Huaisang had been carrying in his body. He sighed, low and exhausted, and allowed Jin Guangyao to

embrace him fully once the guan and pins had been laid aside.

This soft, quiet, completely earnest trust was another gesture of vulnerability that Jin Guangyao had absolutely no intention of letting anyone else experience, and though he was sincere in his caretaking, he couldn't

resist reveling just a *little* bit in the warmth between them and the feeling of his fingers sliding through the loose sections of the other man's hair as smoothly as water.

"Come on," he finally said, walking backwards towards the bed and tugging Nie Huaisang along with him.

"Boots and belt off, and I'll help you take your hair down the rest of the way."

"Okay," Nie Huaisang murmured, pulling away to begin removing his outer layers.

He'd just sat down on the bed and pushed off the boots when there was a knock.

"I'll get it," Jin Guangyao said when

Nie Huaisang moved to stand. "You just stay put."

It was the young maid, with a tea tray that had a surprisingly large array of various dumplings and cakes. "The meat ones are duck or pork only. I asked one of the cooks to open a few to double check," she said proudly.

He motioned her in to set the tray on the bedside table, then as he walked her back to the door, he handed her two silver taels from his sleeve. "One for you, one for the cook you spoke to. Thank you for your diligence," he said with a smile. "And let them know I said you could

have two pastries as well."

Beaming, the girl bowed extra low in thanks, then left.

Jin Guangyao closed the door and returned to Nie Huaisang, who was looking at all the food with apprehension.

"You're going to help me eat this, right?"

"If that's what you prefer."

"*Yes.*"

He turned and poured tea for Nie Huaisang, handing him the cup before sitting to begin undoing the braids.

"I don't know what I'm going to do tomorrow," Nie Huaisang said after taking a sip. "I should... I'm supposed to make up for causing a scene, shouldn't I? Isn't that how

it goes?"

"You would be surprised how many don't bother," Jin Guangyao replied, managing to keep the bitterness out of his voice as he reached for a comb.

Though, in this particular case, he didn't *want* Nie Huaisang to offer to do so. There were too many, his father in

particular, who would be all too happy to take *advantage* of such an offer after what they'd witnessed tonight.

"Simply apologize and say that you are yourself again and will be conducting your part of the discussions with the appropriate decorum."

"Okay."

And while

Nie Huaisang was thinking about how to word his apology, Jin Guangyao would be thinking about how to keep a pack of scavengers from touching what was his.

(End)

(I'm going to add comfort kisses in the ao3 version of this because I'm embarrassed I got to the ending without even ONE)