Dr.N Profile picture
Jun 9 8 tweets 2 min read Twitter logo Read on Twitter
Children younger than 16 do not need smartphones or access to social media in my humble opinion.
Get them laptops for school work & research.
Set up Google family link, Net Nanny or other protective soft ware.
Devices must be used in full view of everyone.
Check sites visited
Babies as young as 5 are being exposed to online nudity.
I'm sure you want your child/ward not to lag behind other kids who have iphones. Banish the thought!
You are the one who is nervous about doing the right thing. You can deal with your need to keep up with the joneses
Without exposing those kids.
Send them to schools with policy of zero phones.
My kid's classmates created a WhatsApp group ostensibly for studying but since it was my no they used, I saw that no studying was going on. I deleted them.
If it was her phone, I would never know.
Do you have enough time on your hands to monitor that phone & social media page 24 hours a day? Groomers and pedophiles are hard at work. Their income comes from being patient with kids. Yours comes from making time NOT to be with the kids so you can work.
Who do you think wins?
I hear you wondering "what's their biz? It's my kid."
Ummm...no.
Children are usually sent to lure and conscript other children. That is why we are sounding the alarm. It concerns us bc man is a social animal.
I can give you an age-appropriate list of activities your child
Will enjoy if you reduce his screen time.
Also, his or her academic performance will improve.
He/she will no longer be restless/aggressive. Some of these children bite and scratch nannies and teachers. And they are not special needs children.
Their eyesight will improve.
Their posture and sleep will improve.
They will make friends and learn to actually interact with their environment.
You don't know what you are missing!
Yes, their obsession with the phone has made your life easier but in your old age, you will wish you had an independent
Well-adjusted adult who can further your legacy.
Rather than an adult who still requires your intervention too frequently for comfort.

Take courage. It's not too late.

#parenting101

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More from @Nenabekee

Jun 7
Diary of a wimpy kid.
After you have taught your child to always use their magic words, to be kind and courteous and to treat adults with respect, there's a problem.
The majority of children today are being taught the opposite. They see their parents bully the drivers & nannies.
They see their parents rush to school to assault teachers who dare to call out their kid's bad behaviour.
They see parents use money to stop nonsense.
In Nigeria, a big man's dog is a big dog no matter if it's actually a chihuahua.
So for being well behaved, your child
Will either be picked on or even bullied. You have to prepare them for this. Teach them to detect when an equal is trying to make a door mat of them. They must push back without throwing their good manners out of the door.
Most especially, boys are in danger of false accusations
Read 7 tweets
May 3
Every family needs a mission statement.
All the children should know it.
It should guide parenting decisions and frame conversations about identity.

One of the things my family aims for is to raise independent adults who are self-disciplined, brilliant and entrepreneurial.
To achieve this, I cannot do everything for my kids no matter how much I want to. The only way to develop self-discipline is to give children the opportunity to decide to do the right thing even when no one is watching.
I assign chores, make the older ones review homework
And teach them to be courteous to adults in my employ.
Sometimes, I would rather wash a dish myself. It would be faster and I would do a better job but I don't want to deny them the opportunity to improve.
Brilliance in my definition is to love knowledge. I set high standards
Read 8 tweets
Apr 30
If you just got married or you have kids < 3 yrs I will share a good strategy you can use to make them passionate about the bible.
This is the age when kids are exposed to video games, cartoons, you tube sing alongs in order for parents to buy time for chores and work or Biz.
You can use this period to ignite in them an appetite for wholesome entertainment.
1. During car rides, play DVDs like Veggie tales, Donut man e.t.c.
2. Tell them one bible story every day. Keep it short and simple and use lots of dramatisation.
3. After Sunday school
Always ask what they were taught and what it means to them. Give rewards when they remember memory verses. Even 2 yr olds can remember simple phrases.
4. Buy them story books, picture books and wall art with Scriptures.
5. Teach them to pray. Once a child can speak, they can pray
Read 6 tweets
Feb 3, 2022
As a young girl me too I was chorusing "I will not marry a broke man!"
Each time we got dressed to go out my mom would shout "Ndi ji jeep biawa!" i.e men who drive SUVs should besiege my daughters.

When I met my husband he was a student who I prob had more pocket money than.
Here are the qualities of a rich man who doesn't have the money in the bank yet🤪🤪🤪
1. They are not intimidated by money. If he freaks out about certain sums of money, he's not ready.
2. They put the work in. They don't just talk a good game, they will take the most menial job
If that is what it takes. You cannot be prouding when your father did not leave you mansions.
3. They have a great attitude. If they get moody whenever money is low to the point of being down in the dumps, hmmm...
4. They are able to articulate their goals, plans and dreams
Read 10 tweets
Mar 2, 2021
I had been married about 1 year when we moved to Lagos. I was yet to get a new job and I had a baby so I was spending quite a bit of time at home.
One day, I remembered that "they" said you should get dressed up when your husband is coming home so that they will not be tempted
By the "Strange Woman"
I put on a nice outfit, did my hair and wore perfume.
When Hubs came in, I went to the door and posed.
Him: Are you going somewhere?
Me: No
Him: Sure?
Me: Yep
Him: So why???
Me: I just wanted to...
Him:
Him: But you're at home?
Me: I just wanted to look nice to welcome you.
Him: Hian!
Me: 🙈
Him: You're at home. You need to be comfortable. Relax abeg...

Me:
Read 5 tweets
Oct 6, 2020
Hearing "I love you" is not the same thing as feeling loved.
When you feel loved, the words need not be spoken before the goosebumps show up.
I had been a Christian for years and I said God loved me but I didn't feel it. I felt I was always missing the mark.
I couldn't breathe.
I had to confess my sins every 5 minutes in case rapture occurs.
I had to search my thoughts in case something funny was hiding there.
No matter how much I cleaned up, I never felt clean enough.
And then I found out that I had been taking soap to the soap factory
I stopped the scrubbing and learned to listen.
Every morning, when he wakes me up and says "Nnenna, I love you. You make me happy. You are my baby."
I don't begin to explain to him how wrong he is, how I couldn't possibly be his, how many mistakes I made the day before...
Read 6 tweets

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