Sacha Coward Profile picture
Jun 16, 2023 16 tweets 3 min read Read on X
Why don't you, a cisgender heterosexual person get a flag?
Why don't you get a pride month?

Let's imagine you are asking this truly in good faith and break it down. 1/
The concept of 'pride' amongst LGBTQ+ people originated around 1970.

The word 'pride' was chosen as it is is the opposite of 'shame'.

Shame being the emotion generally felt by and attributed to queer people, both internally and societally. 2/
The rainbow flag, in all variations, represents a rallying cry against shame, discrimination and invisibility. It was also a way for people to recognise each other, come together, establish a community and a network. It was originally designed by Gilbert Baker in 1978. 3/
So why don't you get one?

Well. As a straight person have you ever been made to feel ashamed for being straight? I'm not asking have you ever felt shame, we all have, but have you ever been shamed for your inclination to be attracted to the opposite sex? 4/
Next question.

Have you ever been shamed for being the same gender as that assigned at birth. Again, I'm not asking about 'shame' in general, but for the fact that you are the same gender as is on your birth certificate? 5/
Ok now let's talk about safety.

Have you ever felt unsafe because of the gender of the person you are attracted to, or for being the same gender as that assigned at your birth?

Not fear in general, and not for other things, but for those specific reasons? 6/
You can be proud of so many things as a cis-het person: Your life, your accomplishments, the hardships you've survived... But if you've never been challenged by your sexuality or for being cisgender, then what would 'straight pride' even mean? 7/
Should we have a 'wealthy pride' parade, or an 'able body pride parade', or a 'non physical deformity' pride parade?

What would flags or history months mean for these things, that are not deemed shameful, and seen as 'good' or 'normal' or 'correct'? 8/
Also, without a flag or a parade, have you ever struggled to find other cisgender heterosexual people?

Have you ever thought 'I'm the only cisgender heterosexual person that I know and I'm completely alone'?

I can guarantee most queer young people have felt the equivalent. 9/
Finally, have you struggled to find stories of people that had the same sexuality and gender expression as you?

Has it even occured that this could be a thing?

If you go to a library, would it be a challenge to find something written by a straight cisgender person? 10/
Let me be clear.
You're not bad for not experiencing these things differently. Indeed, in many many ways I am probably more privileged than you. You have experiences I could never fully imagine or understand.

Just not in this one particular arena. 11/
You don't get a flag, or a parade, not because you're not deserving, or you've done something wrong. But because in this particular arena, you are considered the baseline, the archetype, normal, good, fine. 12/
A straight flag, a cisgender parade, would not be about pride. (How can you be proud of being universally 'acceptable').

Instead it would be perceived as crowing over your own privilege within this one arena: Celebrating your comfort, your security, your normality. 13/
It would be perceived as cruel.

Pride is a ubiquitous human emotion. LGBTQ+ people don't own it.
Privilege is a ubiquitous human trait. LGBTQ+ people aren't free of it.

But in this one way society divides people up, you are on the side that is deemed 'better'. So, be kind. 14/
Finally, there are very fair critiques of Pride. Of how companies use it. Of how it can become a cynical marketing tactic. Of what exactly it should be in 2023.

LGBTQ+ people debate this furiously every year! /15
So, no flag for you.
No parade for you.
At least not for being straight or for being cisgender.

Be thankful that you will probably never require one. In the meantime be supportive if you can, join in if you like.

Or just close your eyes for a month...

Happy Pride 🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️ /16

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More from @sacha_coward

Mar 29
There's a current narrative that everyone has ADHD these days, that it's a fad, and diagnoses and medication are handed out like tic-tacs.

Well. Let me talk through my experience.

Throughout school I received notes like this from teachers... /1 Image
I was well behaved at school, and I got good grades. So because it was the early 2000s the only explanation for my lack of attention, constant fidgeting and disorganization were that I wasn't trying hard enough; I was not stupid, so I must be lazy.

I internalised this. 2/ Image
I coasted, doing well, being mostly happy, but constantly struggling with simple life tasks. The background anxiety that came with this, I thought was normal. Until in my early twenties I had a complete nervous breakdown.

No one, least of all me, understood what was going on. /3 Image
Read 14 tweets
Jul 14, 2024
It's quite incredible how us gays have moved from being dangerous perverts to small children that must be protected from scary endocrinologists by the brave heterosexuals.

Of course that's until we actually stand by our trans friends and then it's right back in the pervert bin.
The speed the rhetoric on here flips from 'the vulnerable gays are being transed' to 'shut up you filthy groomer' is enough to give you whiplash.
We are an exceptional group of people that have survived a lot throughout history, we do not need your false support and we are not a handy meat shield for hurting another minority when it's convenient.
Read 5 tweets
Mar 12, 2024
Ok as a queer historian I'm getting so tired of this:

LGBTQ+ historian: And so this person might have identified as LGBT today.

Conservative press: 'QUEER HISTORIANS' SAY ALL VIKINGS WERE TRANS!!!?
There is such bad faith reading of any research into history that isn't just regurgitating the status quo. Any opinions are taken to such a basic headline grabbing extreme solely to discredit the actual words of the historian and stoke outrage.

It's so boring.
And I'm going to mute this, so if you want to write 'STOP ERASING WOMEN' or 'TRANS WAS INVENTED 7 YEARS AGO' go ahead, but I won't see it. X
Read 4 tweets
Feb 16, 2024
Having a drink post tour with a bunch of queer folk and a really unwell man comes over ranting about immigrants, and spewing racist bile. We ask him to leave and he notices a rainbow badge. Instantly he pivots to transphobia and homophobia. 1/
It was clear he wasn't a happy or well man, something had gone very wrong for him. But the things he had hooked his pain into, had connected with on some level, were the very same lines of hate spat out every day by our country's most popular media outlets. 2/
We can roll our eyes, call him a mad weirdo, a lunatic, crazy, any other distancing ableist phrase... But the words he said were no weirder than the tweets I see on this platform every day. He's a product of the hate we are flooding people with day in and day out. 3/
Read 5 tweets
Jan 10, 2024
I've been thinking about the word 'queer' and why (particularly when writing about history) I value it.  Why removing it from the lexicon without a meaningful substitute would be damaging and dangerous in terms of our very ability to talk about ourselves. 1/
(If you don't personally like the word queer, that's fine, I understand. But if you are coming here to tell me I cannot use it, or that it is only ever a slur, I won't be debating with you; Your arguments have been debunked. You don't actually want to have a conversation) 2/
In history when talking about people with same-sex attraction or a gender identity other than that assigned at birth, it can be challenging to define them by contemporary categories: gay, lesbian or trans etc. 3/
Read 15 tweets
Jul 9, 2023
It's interesting that the 'Queer is a slur' crowd have no issue with calling heterosexual people 'straight', even though the implication of that is very clear... It goes to show who is really attempting to control the conversation.
1. I don't have an issue with calling people straight: It has an implied homophobia, but I'd rather acknowledge than deny it.
2. This is is not aimed at LGBT+ people who do not like using the word queer for themselves, and do not attempt to censor the language of others.
Still it's clearly no coincidence that when LGBTQ+ people attempt to reclaim and organise around a word, they are scolded for using a 'bad word', by the very same people who think implying heterosexual people are 'normal' in language is AOK.
Read 4 tweets

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