Why you shouldn't necessarily take life advice from rich people (a thread)👇
Have you ever noticed how many rich people advocate for a balanced, healthy and happy lifestyle—after they’re rich?
You know, after they've spent 10 years grinding, failing, suffering and eating Big Macs for breakfast?
Humans have a tendency to misplace cause and effect.
You'll see rich people notice improvement in their lives and their productivity when they start doing things like morning yoga and drinking chia seed smoothies for breakfast...
But then erroneously assume that those things are going to help others get to the same position of success.
They tend to forget the fact that they’ve just spent years in the trenches, surviving month-to-month on no sleep and Taco Bell’s dollar menu.
I think rich people’s advice on work-life balance misses a certain step.
There seems to be an escape velocity phenomenon where you need an immense amount of force/pressure to get off the ground & into the success orbit. Then once you're in orbit, you can kinda ease off a bit.
Here’s a short video where I discuss this point:
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Today is my 40th birthday. Here are all the things that I know at 40 which I wish I knew at 20.
Starting with…
1. Your relationship with others is a direct reflection of your relationship with yourself. If you treat yourself poorly, then you will unconsciously seek out and tolerate others who treat you poorly. If you treat yourself with dignity and respect, then you will only tolerate others who treat you with dignity and respect.
Get right with yourself. Get right with the world.
2. The only way to feel better about yourself is to do things worth feeling good about. Respect is earned, not given.
3. The only failure is not trying. The only rejection is not asking. The only mistake is not risking anything.
Success and failure are fuzzy concepts that only exist in your brain before you do something, not after. After the fact, everything will have some mixture of both success and failure within them. And the only real failure is doing nothing.
4. No one is coming to save you. No single thing will solve all of your problems. No goal, no achievement, no relationship will ever fix you. You will always feel mildly inadequate, and somewhat dissatisfied with your life. Nothing is wrong with you for feeling this way. On the contrary, it may be the most normal thing about you.
What I’m about to tell you is going to help you stop caring what people think so you can get on with your life and start being awesome like this guy 🧵👇
There's a concept in psychology known as the Spotlight Effect. Now, the Spotlight Effect says that we all tend to assume that people are paying far more attention to us than they actually are.
Think back to the last time you got a terrible haircut. Chances are you walked around all day assuming that everybody was staring at that fucking tragedy of a mop on your head. But the reality was most people didn't notice. And if they noticed, they sure didn't give a fuck.
There’s an amazing concept in psychology that might explain why you’re not making progress on your problems:
Years ago, researchers at Harvard sat people down and showed them a series of dots and asked them to identify which ones were blue.
At first, there was a mix of blue and non blue, and people were pretty accurate. But as the experiment went on, there were fewer blue dots shown, and people became less accurate and were regularly mistaken.
It’s the middle of the night and I'm in some cheap bungalow accommodation in rural India.
I’m having cold sweats. My head is throbbing. I’m dehydrated. And there’s no access to clean water.
Then, suddenly, the whole room becomes infested with thousands of giant buzzing mosquitos.
This was actually one of the best nights of my life 🙏
Not the situation itself. That sucked. But the experience. Because when you go through that sort of hell and return home, having an awkward conversation isn’t a big deal anymore. Feeling a little hungover will never make you cancel brunch with your friends again. And getting out of bed early for the gym is a breeze.
My experiences traveling have without a doubt been the best part of my personal development. Here are just a few of the lessons I took from 10 years overseas, which I get into in this episode:
✴️Every culture around the world has a trade-off of values—which positive systems it chooses to prioritize or what expectations it chooses to put on its people end up being at the expense of something else.
✴️Happiness is the wrong question. The human mind is incredibly resilient and the happiness found in children playing in ditches and watching their siblings get typhoid doesn’t eliminate their general suffering.
✴️Most people are good and it only takes hanging out with the people of any country you have a strong political view about to realize that most people are cool, and it’s only the system or the government that’s being obnoxious or murderous.
✴️If you value minimizing human suffering, prosperity, health and mental well-being, some country’s systems work better than others. I think it's really important to not make that a taboo statement.
✴️And much more…
This episode was a team favorite because there’s something for everyone, even if you can’t travel right now. So get into it, like it, review it, share it with someone you want to inspire the hell out of. And stay fucking frosty.
I just optimized the most efficient morning routine ever, based on theories and knowledge that no one is talking about.
It goes like this:
1. Wake Up 2. Walk to My Office 3. Start Working
"Mark, but how??!?" you ask. Follow along as I break it down, step-by-step. 🧵👇
Step 1: This is the first step. Next to my bed. I step here first.
My wife is usually asleep so I try to be quiet and not to fart. But if you're single or hate your partner, you can be noisy or fart.
Step 2: Next, I step into the hallway outside my bedroom.
There are windows in this hallway and I can see trees outside them. Science suggests that windows with trees make you 12.12389912% happier and more productive. I recommend lots of windows and lots of trees. 🌲🌳🌴
5 Truths That We Don’t Want to Hear, But Need to Hear:
1) Pain is inevitable.
We falsely believe it’s possible to get rid of the pain in our lives. We think, “If I could just have a jet ski, everything would be grand,” while not foreseeing the pain we'll feel when our drunken sister rides away on it, never to be seen again.
2) Suffering is optional.
Though we will always experience pain, we can control the meaning we ascribe to it. If we decide the pain of our break-up means we’re unworthy of love, we will suffer. If we decide it means our partner wasn’t the right person for us, we won't.