Thread by @broadwaybabyto

A few months ago a “friend” told me that he felt disabled people should be denied access to healthcare so “survival of the fittest” could happen faster.

That people like me are the reasons he - a non disabled cishet white man - can’t get ahead.

How did we get here? 🧵/1

First of all - I’m fortunate that this is someone I can walk away from and I don’t have to tolerate this behaviour going forward.

That said - I had previously known this man to be relatively kind, tolerant and gentle… so I was taken aback by the hatred he put on display /2

Hatred towards disabled people is nothing new - but lately it seems far more people are willing to not only say the quiet part out loud… but to shout it from the rooftops.

It’s a terrifying time to be disabled. It’s not just the threat of Covid - it’s the threat of eugenics /3

I wanted to understand where this behaviour change was coming from - so I engaged politely in the conversation & asked a few direct questions.

Best as I could tell his newfound loathing of people “like me” came from a combination of the political climate & pandemic response /4

Sometime over the last four years - he got it into his head that disabled people were such a drain on resources that he would be further ahead in life if we weren’t provided healthcare or assistance.

He saw his tax dollars as exclusively supporting us - and he was mad /5

I pointed out the absurdity of that logic - and that a great many disabled people get no social assistance at all. I tried to educate him that his tax dollars go to more than just healthcare & disability supports - they go to all kinds of programs he benefits from regularly /6

None of it mattered. He had his mind firmly made up. We are the reason he’s not further ahead in life and the best way for him to get ahead is not to work harder, save more money or do ANYTHING proactive himself - it’s to eliminate us. As quickly as possible. /7

It was a terrifying talk. At one point he attempted to back peddle & stated he didn’t mean me personally - just everyone else “like me”. That he wants me to survive but that’s selfish because he cares about me - not because he thinks I have a right to his tax dollars /8

I’m unsure why he thought that clarification would make things better - but he did. The level of entitlement, hubris & anger had me pretty distraught… and then he turned his attention to Covid. Said that being forced to mask was the most egregious violation he had experienced /9

Naturally his being forced to mask was also my fault (isn’t everything at this point?). He wanted it made clear that he would never stand for that kind of violation to his bodily autonomy. He wouldn’t do something he disliked just to protect people who should already be dead. /10

I asked him how having to wear a mask in public for a brief period of time was MORE of a violation than denying someone healthcare or knowingly infecting (and possibly killing) someone by giving them Covid? Surely that’s also a violation of bodily autonomy? /11

The response was that intent matters & denying disabled people healthcare or being in public Covid positive and not masking is not done with the intent to harm. Whereas the intent of masking was to force something upon him he didn’t want. Apparently we “want” death & covid? /12

This is where we’ve ended up. A person who claims to care about me - who I’ve known for over two decades - feels that the few months he had to wear a mask was a greater violation to his body than forcing me into a situation that will result in my death. /13

This is exactly why disabled people say that we’re seeing a rise in eugenics. This person may be misinformed, angry and ignorant - but they’re also 100% spouting eugenicist policies and attitudes. And they don’t have any remorse about it. /14

Can you imagine the amount of privilege a person has to have had in life to end up thinking wearing a mask was THE worst thing to ever happen to them? I wish having to wear a mask was the worst thing that’s ever happened to me. /15

Yet despite the tremendous privilege this friend has - they still blame any perceived flaws in their life on disabled people. On the government pandering to us. On covid policies. /16

He also told me no one has the right to make him wear a mask ever - because his bodily autonomy is the most important thing there is. But infecting & possibly killing a disabled person? Denying us healthcare & social supports? /17

He sees that as good fiscal policy & not a violation of our autonomy. I can only assume this is because he doesn’t think we deserve autonomy.

What scares me is I don’t think this person is an anomaly anymore. Perhaps most wouldn’t be quite so blunt…but many think this way. /18

This type of thinking is why it’s been so easy for governments to sweep the pandemic under the rug - throwing disabled people to the wayside with reckless abandon. A reckoning will come though… you have to pay the piper eventually. /19

People like this friend don’t think disability can ever befall them - when disabled people understand just how temporary health can be. If you support eugenicist beliefs & policies… there won’t be anyone left to protect you when it’s your turn. /20

Please - be kinder to people. We all deserve to have access to healthcare and social supports. We all need bodily autonomy. Disabled people are no different from anyone else - we should never be treated as “less than.” /21

Try not to be so easily swayed by politicians and leaders selling you comfortable lies and doing it at our expense. Get to know us. Listen to us. Spend time with us. We will help you see that we are going down a very dangerous path but there’s still time to change things. /22

As for my “friend”… I don’t expect to ever speak to him again. I think he’s too far down the rabbit hole and won’t likely come out of it until something drastic happens to him. I’m sad at losing yet another relationship - but can’t keep toxic people like that in my life /23

That said … I still believe in the good in people. I believe we are better than this. I believe those who care about others & genuinely want to be of service to the world outnumber the hateful & spiteful among us. We just aren’t always the loudest. /24

So stay strong, hold your head up high and keep speaking out. Don’t ever let someone diminish your feelings, your experiences or your right to safely exist in this world. Reach out for support & find your tribe. We really are stronger together. /end