JB Thinkin™️ 🏴‍☠️ Profile picture
Jan 4 1 tweets 2 min read Read on X
SCENE: A dark room, deep inside Mar-a-Lago, months before the election.
trump Minions: Sir, we think we have a plan to ensure victory in the election.
trump: Everyone will just vote for me, why do we need a plan?
Minions: Well sir, we aren't so sure about that. The assassination plan didn't get the boost in the polls we had hoped for.
trump: Damn..I thought I did a great job, just like Hulk Hogan taught me.
Minions: Oh no sir, you did great..the fist pumps at the end..brilliant! However, we need something that will ensure victory, you want your freedom don't you?
trump: Yes! I must win! I can't go to prison. Who will change me??
Minions: Yes...well...we invited Ivanka here to tell us something exciting. Ivanka?
trump: My VANKEY! She's so hot!
Ivanka: Thanks Daddy. Remember when I obtained those Chinese patents for voting machines? Well, we have all the information we needed now in order to hack them and get the information. The plan worked!
Musk: Yes, and with my Starlink satellites, we can gather that information and change the data, and return the results within seconds. And nobody will know.
trump: Hey, when did Elon get here!!
Minions: Sir, he's been sleeping on the couch in your office for weeks now!
trump: I have an office?
Ivanka: Daddy, we can change the votes and make it so you win ALL of the swing states, which hasn't been done in over 40 years!!
trump: Sounds like a solid plan! And less "fake-bloody" than the last one. Let's do it!
Minions: Excellent sir, we will start planning now. One last thing. You can never refer to "our little secret" in public and don't share it with anyone. Can you do that?
trump: You can count on me! Nobody holds back from sharing secrets better than trump!
Minions...Uhh...ya..right....
END SCENE 🎬

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