NNN THREAD
“Putin folds like a toddler: The Blippi Effect”
with Steve-O, NNN’s senior analyst (he says he isn’t, but we have the lanyard)
“Putin folds like a toddler: The Blippi Effect”
with Steve-O, NNN’s senior analyst (he says he isn’t, but we have the lanyard)
1.
Just hours after NNN broke the story:
Blippi to replace Pete Hegseth.
Putin blinks.
Says he’s open to peace.
That’s not a coincidence.
That’s the Blippi Effect.
Just hours after NNN broke the story:
Blippi to replace Pete Hegseth.
Putin blinks.
Says he’s open to peace.
That’s not a coincidence.
That’s the Blippi Effect.
2.
Steve-O didn’t want to talk to us.
He said, and I quote:
“I’m just here to fix the vending machine.”
We gave him a suit jacket and called him our senior analyst.
Now he’s on record.
Steve-O didn’t want to talk to us.
He said, and I quote:
“I’m just here to fix the vending machine.”
We gave him a suit jacket and called him our senior analyst.
Now he’s on record.
3.
Steve-O, NNN Analyst (unwilling):
“Look, man, Blippi’s got reach. Dude’s got like 10 billion views. You think Putin wants that smoke? He backed down faster than my ex when I asked about joint custody of the air fryer.”
Steve-O, NNN Analyst (unwilling):
“Look, man, Blippi’s got reach. Dude’s got like 10 billion views. You think Putin wants that smoke? He backed down faster than my ex when I asked about joint custody of the air fryer.”
4.
When asked if Blippi could de-escalate the war in Ukraine, Steve-O stared at the wall and said:
“He got my nephew to sit still for nine minutes. Nine. That’s military-grade psychological warfare.”
When asked if Blippi could de-escalate the war in Ukraine, Steve-O stared at the wall and said:
“He got my nephew to sit still for nine minutes. Nine. That’s military-grade psychological warfare.”
5.
Steve-O then accidentally made sense:
“This ain’t about diplomacy. It’s about presence. Blippi walks into the Pentagon in orange suspenders and Putin knows: playtime is over.”
Steve-O then accidentally made sense:
“This ain’t about diplomacy. It’s about presence. Blippi walks into the Pentagon in orange suspenders and Putin knows: playtime is over.”
6.
Steve-O says if Blippi really wants peace:
“He should show up in Kyiv with a ukulele and a bunch of puzzles. Putin won’t last five minutes before asking to join the coloring table.”
Steve-O says if Blippi really wants peace:
“He should show up in Kyiv with a ukulele and a bunch of puzzles. Putin won’t last five minutes before asking to join the coloring table.”
7.
To be clear, Steve-O has no formal geopolitical training.
He once got banned from Risk night for using a Nerf gun.
But we stand by his analysis.
Because he stands by his gut.
And by “gut” we mean “cooler of Red Bull.”
To be clear, Steve-O has no formal geopolitical training.
He once got banned from Risk night for using a Nerf gun.
But we stand by his analysis.
Because he stands by his gut.
And by “gut” we mean “cooler of Red Bull.”
8.
Steve-O’s closing statement:
“Honestly? I don’t trust anyone in a suit. Except Blippi. That guy’s suit means something.”
Steve-O’s closing statement:
“Honestly? I don’t trust anyone in a suit. Except Blippi. That guy’s suit means something.”
9.
NNN cannot confirm Steve-O’s credentials.
But we can confirm:
Putin blinked. Blippi rises.
And in the chaos of war, sometimes the only clarity…
comes from jazz hands.
NNN cannot confirm Steve-O’s credentials.
But we can confirm:
Putin blinked. Blippi rises.
And in the chaos of war, sometimes the only clarity…
comes from jazz hands.
END THREAD
Follow NNN for more analyst takes from people who actively do not want to be quoted.
That’s how you know it’s real.
Follow NNN for more analyst takes from people who actively do not want to be quoted.
That’s how you know it’s real.
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