Thread by @SmmClickp

How can a guy deal with jealousy?

Many people feel anxious or even angry when their loved ones suddenly start communicating warmly with someone else – this is absolutely natural. So, if you think that you are somehow different, you can breathe a sigh of relief. Everything is ok!

The question is how far will jealousy go, will it become irrational, will it cause problems for you and the girl. If you want to understand the nature of this feeling and learn to keep it under control, read the article – we will tell you everything.

What is jealousy and where does it come from?
As you already understood, it is not one emotion, but a whole set AS SHOWN ON : anxiety, anger, envy, a feeling that you have been betrayed or are about to be betrayed.18fu.com

A similar feeling is experienced to one degree or another by everyone who loves, and this applies not only to romantic relationships. Remember your childhood: you 100% felt about the same if your parents paid more attention not to you.

But this does not mean that you do not need to learn to cope with jealousy. You want to build a healthy harmonious relationship with your girlfriend, in which you will both be happy and be able to trust each other, right? To make it easier, we have collected some universal tips.

These are simple recommendations, but they really help to cope with jealousy in relationships. Something will surely come in handy for you.

Advice from psychologists
Of course, each situation is individual, all people are different, and what worked for one guy and helped him cope with a destructive feeling may have minimal effect in your case. Then act according to the situation

- perhaps it is worth talking to a psychologist in person. A specialist will definitely be able to answer your question on how a guy can stop being jealous of a girl, and will share really valuable recommendations.

Figure out why you're jealous.
The first step is to understand why jealousy arises, to deal with the cause of the problem. And here there are two possible options.

· There are real reasons. For example, a girl is clearly flirting with other guys, doesn't answer calls, constantly disappears somewhere, hides stories from you, your friends see her with someone else.

In such cases, jealousy is an absolutely normal reaction to the behavior of a person who gives reasons.
· There are no grounds, and the feeling arises irrationally. Sometimes it appears without any real reasons: you can start to wind yourself up and get jealous.

even if your girlfriend is just talking to a classmate or colleague, goes to concerts or to a cafe without you. It is clear that you are afraid of losing her and think that she does not pay enough attention to you (or pays it not only to you).

Here, jealousy is your fantasy, which can lead to unnecessary conflicts.
In the first case, it's more about her, and in the second - about you. But even if there are real reasons, you still need to learn how to cope with jealousy in relation to your beloved girl.

In any situation, it is important to remain calm. What if you consider communication with other guys to be cheating, and she does not think so? And here we move on to the next piece of advice.

Discuss this with the girl
Do you realize that you are jealous and it is having a negative impact on your relationship? Talk to her. This will help you clarify the situation and find solutions. Important point: speak openly and honestly.

Are you sick to your stomach with jealousy when she posts photos with her guy friends? Do you feel cheated when you find out that a classmate gave her a ride home? Say so. Remember that views on some things may differ.

What you consider cheating, for her may just be friendly communication. So, perhaps, she will be surprised that a completely ordinary event, from her point of view, has become a cause for concern for you, and will ask you to stop being jealous for no reason.

And do not forget that feelings can be caused not only by real situations, but also by your own fears and insecurities. Discuss this with the girl, try to find ways to strengthen your connection and trust in each other. But don't forget a few important rules:

· Choose the right time and place. Don't start a conversation when you're both tired or irritated. It's better to choose another time when you can focus on the conversation;

· communicate calmly and respectfully. Do not blame her and especially do not raise your voice. Try to express your feelings and concerns constructively;

· listen carefully. Give her the opportunity to express her point of view, try to put yourself in her shoes and understand why she acts this way and not differently;
· Offer a solution and be prepared to compromise. You may have to make some concessions to find common ground.

Work on yourself
It can be hard to admit, but jealousy is often a consequence of your own problems. For example, low self-esteem - in this case, you perceive any guy communicating with her as a competitor, whom the girl may prefer.

This is not ok, bro. Look at the situation from her side: she dates you, is in love, but tries to be the life of the party - and then suddenly gets incomprehensible claims for communicating with other guys.

It turns out that you simply forbid her to be herself because of your own complexes. Get rid of them. This will not only improve your relationship, but also make you a more confident and happier person in general. Here are some specific examples of what you should fix in yourself

Develop self-confidence. Such guys are less jealous because they know their worth and are not afraid that their beloved will choose someone else. @threadreaderapp unroll