Thread by @HargreavesRJ

I really hope that I can emigrate one day

I would be willing to give up an internal organ, to lose a limb. To be facially disfigured, to be put in a wheelchair. It doesn't matter what it is I would be willing to go though it.

Suicide year for me next year 2026 if I can't leave

I understand psychology really well and it is so easy to try and pathologise it as a disorder but it is society and what it offers.

It wouldn't make a scrap of difference what job I have, the friends group, the level of income, none of it would change it.

I refuse to seek help for it in any way shape or form

It is the restriction in society and the life that is on offer here doesn't even begin to mean anything to me

It is concrete that I will not have children in this country and I want to start a family in 2026/27 latest

He doesn't have enough money =

No I actually want a job in Germany that pays ~25,000€/year
Not interested in your £100k a year job at Google
Not interested in a £300k a year job at a bank

Maybe my living conditions aren't very good?

No I just want to have something like my old studio in Germany I was paying £400 a month for it, it was small

Not interested in the slightest in the £350k home in the UK, absolutely no interest.

People in the UK are working hard to be able to afford things like a new toaster and a £300 shoes because that means they 'Made it'

They are stupid

I used to like going to sport clubs and things like that and now I have 100% withdrawn from them because of the Protestant surveillance over us.

Social media being watched, get gas lighted over expression. Like some kind of Stasi

I go the gym but I would never in a million years join any type of sport club. I was cycling, triathlon, swimming, they are surveilling us

Little officers of Protestant empire to see if we have too few clothes on or if we are on OnlyFans. Checking if you speak about SEX

I don't mean this in the sense of the Muslims but this is the sport club, workplace etc

They are installed and snooping on you constantly.

The British Naturism are the same. I enjoy doing naked things in society but I also like sex things too.

They ostracise you if you post anything related to sex or sexual expression because it is like a pyramid system of them being watched

In Germany you don't need them

So I just don't do anything because of it.

All the things I enjoy doing I have withdrawn from entirely because I need to maintain my freedom of who I am and that comes above those people.

They strip us of body/erotic/sexual expression

BUT somehow there is a British up the sleeve version

- London's 'biggest' in world Torture Garden
- Killing Kittens (Kate Middletons friend)
- Bonnie Blue or Lily Phillips
- Swingers festival (tent accommodation)

Everything that the UK has is always 'Exclusive' or 'Performative' or you need to look like David Beckham to not feel ridiculed to copy (designed that way within very low expression bounds).

I am going keep on pumping and pumping it out and I will finally get to the bottom of it.

It is not about repression because I could go to these things or try to but I don't want to. It is the selection of them, the type of them and the odd way people act at them.

We are forced to live under strict surveillance where any place that can admit children. The sport clubs idea I think is that if you are a member even the things you do away from the club could make them look bad, or another members children might look at your social media

I am not sure I haven't investigated it enough yet. But it is all on my list to detail in threads and to go through the club policies. I am going to contact some sport clubs and ask them for copies of their T&C

Even the gym I am a member at says we can't discuss sexual related matters, they monitor what we are wearing and can throw us out if it is too revealing or tight, they say that we can only be naked in the shower room not sauna. These are in the contract

It is literally like a straitjacket. The only reason I go to the gym is because they don't monitor the social media. I know they don't do that so I can suffer under their surveillance and manage because I want what they offer.

It is a strategy of the government to keep all of the sex crime media flowing day in and day out and then ratchet the safeguarding up and up more and more

Then we all become Muslims (but not under Islam) it is an Anglican Protestantism. We can trace it to key reports and people

For me it means life isn't worth bothering living.
I also find myself carrying it around with me when I leave the country like I went into detail about today too.

It is a Protestant obedience pipeline in the schools with their uniforms and authoritarianism. It starts at age 2 with privacy indoctrination, then they surveil and code kids curiosity behaviour and punish them for it.

All throughout life obedience training and surveillance

It is sad but I would much much rather die than live in a society like this. Death is so much better than life in that sort of society.

I am not ashamed of it I truly want to die if I can't leave. Our bodies are owned to such a huge extent that for me it is entirely unliveable. It is total body conditioning. Absolute body surveillance.

Every single day I hate life as a result of it. Entirely infiltrated by the surveillance I can only be about 1% of myself. Entire over ride of my self and who I am and who I want to be.

I am very tempted to get tattoos all over my face

I want to do some kind of detailed analysis of all of this. I am not really sure about how to go about it but it creates so much pain for me.

I think I had it with the life I had in Germany but it needs more detail, it demonstrates that it is about day to day, month to month

The wankers who analyse these things in psychological sense because I have studied it for years, they would say "I have complex needs"

And it would come down to some kind of prescription of social crap or therapy I don't need

Put you in Iran and see how you feel. Basically that is what it is.

I have been doing quite a lot of investigation over what safeguarding is in the UK vs Germany, how it is structured, which is best at protecting Children and what else the UK adds in

In a nutshell the way it works is that the UK has something similar that is worse at doing the real job that is the protection of children element.

Then they throw in surveillance over the body of members and their social media, sexting, speaking about nudism, sexual matters ++

From a systems perspective the way it works is about core safeguarding (the real part) which is better in Germany because it forces better training and oversight, it is centralised to stop creep into other rights and includes rights of children too.

Then the other bits lets call them safeguarding + are about the creep into your life as a member and what you can wear, speak about, post online, reputational clauses, not taking part in sex work, not even promoting cannabis legalisation.

It is so strict that if they don't like you being on OnlyFans or in porn or naked activities they have the power to tell you to leave.

If you promote legalising cannabis they say that you are promoting illegal things. So you can't speak about it or post about it on social media

It is a very British thing to link through things that relate to morality and surveillance through to the snooping over you in society via the places you need for your recreation or employment.

For me a lot of these things are a core part of who I am. I aspire to do a PhD in sexology (English language in Europe) and would like to start a sex related company. I enjoy nudism and go on holiday every year to France to CHM Montalivet for a decade.

I also want to grow cannabis and I have done it before, I know how to use hydroponics and chemical dosing because I worked in the water industry so I used to design these type of systems, I also understand automation and control and enjoy smoking it

So it all eats you up from the inside due to the silent Stasi surveillance embedded into the clubs and societies and workplaces. Because they have control over who you can be, what you can do, what you can discuss, and what you can post online, who you can have sex with in a film

I have withdrawn from all of it and only go to the gym now and nothing else.

These are the things that make it unliveable in the UK, then throw on top of it the way your children have to be groomed into Protestantism, no way. Then throw on top of that all the "You are a predator" that I was explaining today.

Then throw on top of that what the UK doesn't have that I want from life. On top of that the cost of living in terms of what we get from hard work. Like I was saying before this is the sort of monthly lifestyle I had in Germany including all this for about £1,300 a month all incl

Then from that there is no nightlife here that is inclusive it is full of 18-25 year olds and 'older men are surveilled as predators', no winter sports in the slightest you have to go into hibernation here because it is so shit in winter.

All of this isn't a life here

I think I am gradually working it all out. I will build a framework or I will try to that actually explains it all in one place or I will try to. Lets have a quick go with this thread now and see what comes out of it

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