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5'7" Black Male @absurdistwords
, 13 tweets, 2 min read Read on Twitter
Gutting welfare to teach "some people" to get a job is like slashing Fire Department funding to teach "some people" not to smoke in bed.
"If we keep sending teams of firefighters out to emergency calls, people won't learn the value of not having your house be on fire"
"Really what people need is to learn the feeling of satisfaction one gets from putting out a three alarm fire on one's own.

Fire Departments are holding Americans back"
"See when you send a truck out to a fire, you're just telling that person that they don't have to take responsibility for their homes.

Everyone has faucets. Use them"
"You can't just put fires out for people. You do that, everyone becomes an arsonist, running around every day, setting all their possessions on fire just so they can make that 911 call"
"One time our curtains caught on fire and what did we do? Did we go running to the government for help?

Did we go clogging up public phone lines?

No.

We used a fire extinguisher."
"Everyone can buy a fire extinguisher and learn how to use it and there will be no more fires.

Let's eliminate Fire Departments, use a fraction of that money to give everyone vouchers for one fire extinguisher and a 2 hour class on fire safety."
"...Well don't live in southern California then! Simple"
"The thing is, if you find yourself needing to call a fire Department, you should probably stop and think about all the bad life choices you made that got you to that point."
"It's not anyone's job to put out your fires. Don't have a fire extinguisher? Find a bucket. Don't have a bucket? Use a fire hose. No fire hose? Fill your mouth in the bathroom sink and spit!

Do something, anything to take charge of your life. Don't whine and call the Fire Dept"
"Ok. Sure there was that one time lightning struck our family's house and we had to call the Fire Dept. But we used them RESPONSIBLY, not calling them every day in to put out cigarettes and such like most people who call the Fire Dept do."
"Lightning is an act of God, by the way. There's no way any of us could have prepared for that, so you can't blame us for calling that one time.

But aside from lightning, fires are all the product of poor life choices"
"You know I saw a family of these 'fire victims' the other day, they didn't smell like smoke at all. They had unburnt clothes even. How are you going to call the Fire Dept and still have unburnt belongings huh? Explain that!"
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