Discover and read the best of Twitter Threads about #DadJokes

Most recents (5)

Happy #FathersDay! And, since we know how much you love our #dadjokes, we're at it again this year!

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How do you make a Kleenex dance? Put a little boogie in it!
When does a joke become a dad joke? When it becomes apparent.
Read 12 tweets
A short thread on running for office in USA as an immigrant

45 ran on the claim that America isn't great & we need to "MAGA"

As I campaign for VA Senate on the premise that we can make VA a better place to live, I'm told, "If you don't like it, go back to the Middle East."

1—I’m not Middle Eastern but racists tend to see all brown people spanning 200 nations as one group anyway

2—Even if I was from the ME, fascinating how xenophobes demand immigrants “assimilate,” and then clutch their pearls when we promote democracy by running for office🤔

Why exactly are so many so afraid of immigrants, people of color, women,& other minorities running for office?

Are they afraid of becoming minorities themselves?

Have minorities been mistreated or something in US history? /s🤔

Their fear makes them lash out, for example:

Read 8 tweets
Hey NYC, I’m the keynote speaker at an event on the life of Prophet Muhammad (sa) this Sunday at 1:30pm EST.

Q/A to follow after the lecture. And yes, I'll be wearing my awesome hat.

Tickets are free for this event but limited seating, so RSVP:
Just arrived at the hotel to speak on Prophet Muhammad (sa) and the first thing I see is a sign for a Psychic conference

For a moment I thought I was in the wrong place because I did Not see that coming.😅

(Our event starts at 2pm!)
Full house and great interfaith gathering at our event on Prophet Muhammad (sa).

I’m speaking in a few minutes on the life of Prophet Muhammad (sa) & peace.
Read 3 tweets
Benefits of having three kids #1:
Absolutely noone (family & others) gives unprompted parenting advice anymore (probably because they gave up).
Benefits of having three kids #2:
Being able to say (in theory) things like: “well, *some* of my kids play Golf”
Benefits of having three kids #3:
Being able to switch from man to zone defense at home.
Read 33 tweets

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