Discover and read the best of Twitter Threads about #ScottyFromDamageControl

Most recents (5)

đŸ§”

#GladysTheSuperSpreader has selected her earrings. Lippy & blush applied. Doesn’t spend as much time on her hair these days. Anyway, she’s ready as ever to do what she does best. Deflect from her culpability. The figures will be horrid, but she has her goto plan. 😉
Approach the mic, remove the mask, and make sure the first sentence has a “healthy” or “pleasing” in it. Then some melodramatic faux-empathy heartfelt blah blah. Hand you over to
 and then we’ll take questions.

All the while hoping the others get the questions b/c timefilling
When it’s her turn every question is felt as a narcissistic injury, however she pulls herself together with her trusted can I just say please know well yeah no hideous word salad. Never. Ever. Addressing the crux of a question, for minutes she rambles as 🐑 stand by to attention
Read 12 tweets
đŸ§”

Journalists rocking up for the Kafkaesque (👏? who suggested it describe the pressers) presser this morn, perhaps if you give more thought to how you phrase your questions.

#GladysTheSuperSpreader knows for certain that whatever you ask, she’ll “answer” with waffle.
NEVER addressing the crux of a question, she time-fills with her infamous gaslighting. It’s beyond unsettling to watch you standing as meek sheep. She treats you, & the people of NSW with contempt. “Literally a war” then at 11.46 blithely flats off with “See you again tomorrow”
Unless you’re ok being played like đŸŽ», work out a strategy.

The daily farces show something has to change. Chant’s wordy replies suit #GladysTheCoward down to the ground. Frazzled, yet assured she’ll have a few ?s to “answer” with minutes of do the right thing word-salad.
Read 9 tweets
Remember when #ScottyWentOnAWarFooting? (No not China, that's a different war.) This was because of his govt's inability to organise the #vaccinerollout.
It was a #ScottyFromMarketing strategy to share blame with states & look like he was DOING SOMETHING. 1/
2/ #ScottyFromDamageControl called for National Cabinet to meet three times a week. Oh, & call in someone from the Navy who's good with logistics. They'd do all the heavy lifting & sort out the #vaccinerollout. Here's a photo illustrating how this works.
3/ Then at the top of the steep hill, he could be triumphant, "I did it! All by myself!"
Except something else has happened...Or gone wrong...
Scotty isn't at the top of the #vaccinerollout hill but he's taken of his marching boots & is no longer on a war footing. 🙄
Read 6 tweets
Laura Tingle spot on as usual.
Media release from #ScottyTheAnnouncer on Friday:
"Government chartered repatriation flights to the Centre for National Resilience at Howard Springs for Australians returning from India will resume on May 15," 1/
abc.net.au/news/2021-05-0

2/ What is the "Centre for National Resilience"?
Answer: a quarantine centre (Howard Springs)

Yep, the Minister for Announcements &đŸ‚đŸ’©, #ScottyFromMarketing, had a "jazzy name" for it. Always the most important thing in a pandemic & you've stuffed up.
3/ @latingle writes, it shows the depressing priorities of this government. The starting point for communicating policies is not to tell taxpayers what they need to know is approached "through the prism of a political opportunity, or political badging".
#auspol
Read 20 tweets
As well as the very ugly hallmarks of the Morrison govt, another one sticks out to me: complacency. 'She'll be right'. From the start of the COVID19 pandemic, there has been complacency, which thankfully, premiers & chief ministers haven't shared. 1/
2/ Complacency that COVID would be a faint memory in six months & life would be completely normal. Complacency, despite advice to the contrary, that expanding current fed quarantine facilities & building new ones, wouldn't be required.
3/ Complacency that once states & territories took on hotel quarantine (I imagine, in part because they didn't trust the fed govt to do what was necessary), they could sit back, relax, & accept accolades. #auspol
Read 13 tweets

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