Discover and read the best of Twitter Threads about #VoteGoat2020

Most recents (2)

My fellow Americans.

Today I speak to you, not as your superior, but as a regular. We must look past our differences to our similars. Solutions that help, not the bad stuff. Cupcakes. Football for all to see. Growth. Incentives. And so on.

America. Put your hands on the screen.
Americans don’t want the same old partisan fighting. Americans don’t want finger-pointing. Especially not at me.

#VoteGoat2020

Goat: Everything’s Broken But It’s Nobody’s Fault
America is bold and free and future. I want to share my vision of a Me leading you out of an uncertain Now into a Then full of Something.

“Something” what? It’s a secret. But it’s deep-fried.
Read 5 tweets
Screw it, let’s start passing laws making membership in the Republican Party a felony.
I mean if we’re playing the mean-spirited destructively hostile unconstitutional laws game, then let’s play.

Voters who belong to country clubs and homeowners associations are purged. They can re-register on Labor Day in a Planned Parenthood. From 5:00am to 5:45am.
If you want to itemize on an income of over $500k, you have to pass a drug screen. Every month. Fine of 75% of previous year’s annual income if you fail one.
Read 12 tweets

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