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The Dolby Theater is packed. Everyone's here. Meryl, Lady Gaga, the entire cast of Black Panther -- EVERYONE. The lights dim as a disembodied voice announces: "Ladies, Gentlemen, and Those Among Us Who Transcend the Gender Binary, please welcome your host... TAYLOR MAC!"
Taylor Mac descends from the rafters, wearing the entire gay bar from A Star Is Born as a gown, belting out Shallow as men in Ally drag do a chorus line down below. MAC: "Welcome to the 91st Academy Awards: A Radical Fairy Realness Ritual! Tonight is all about SACRIFICE!"
Behind Taylor Mac, a huge set piece is flown in. It's a GIANT ANUS.
