Discover and read the best of Twitter Threads about #bdsm

Most recents (24)

So, ihr Lieben.

Ein ungewöhnlicher Thread zum Thema #Sexarbeit und auch zum Thema #BDSM - und eigentlich noch viel mehr.

Die Posts darin sind eher für AktivistInnen - aber der Thread ist für euch, meine Vögel.

Ich bitte euch, ihn zu lesen.

~
Ich habe mir heute Abend die 60minütige Sendung "Zeitpunkte" angehört, die man unter diesem Link hier findet:

ardaudiothek.de/zeitpunkte/vor…

Dazu habe ich eine stichwortartige Mitschrift angefertigt. Wirklich nur Stichworte mit sporadischen Zeitangaben, damit nachgehört werden kann. ~
Diese Mitschrift findet sich hier:

meinlebenimpelz.wordpress.com/2019/11/07/exk…
Read 18 tweets
Recently, I've watched a number of F/m spanking videos on SpankingTube, which will reinforce my argument over punishment vs discipline. For a lot of people, the two terms are one and the same. But to me, their intention and execution is totally different.
As I define it, a punishment spanking is just that - pure punishment. It's about inflicting as much pain in a short amount of time as a consequence to bad behavior.
While a discipline spanking is often also a consequence to bad behavior, the agenda is different. It's about helping the recipient acknowledge and repent for the error of his ways. It's about teaching a lesson.
Read 7 tweets
I've had the "pleasure" of being spanked by a wide variety of people over these past two years. But aside from that, many of those were switches so we took turns spanking each other - my favorite kind of red bottomed session.

#spanking #insight #kink #bdsm #fetish
For this posting, while I'm focusing on me being the one with her knickers down, I think a few bottoms of either gender will identify with me. And novice Tops, again regardless of gender, hopefully will learn something about the emotional dynamics of certain types of spankings.
Playing the scene out with a Dom/sub dynamic doesn't work for me. I'm not into being subservient or humiliated. That actually takes me out of the headspace I seek. To me, a really good spanking is one where the recipient comes out of it feeling nurtured, cared for and free.
Read 9 tweets
Some like giving spankings and some like getting them. Some like using spanking as foreplay to sex and others like to use spanking as stress relief. Some folk have relationships where spanking is used to settle disagreements or make everything right after arguments. (9 tweets).
A few of us even think of our sexual orientation as ‘spankophiles’ because nothing else is as exciting to us. And, lastly, spanking captures a whole range of scary experiences, feelings, emotions and sensations in one little word and package.
Playing adult spanking games is almost like therapy for coming to grips with fear of pain, embarrassment, powerlessness, shame, humiliation, and the like.

I like spanking for a bunch of these reasons though punishment, marital harmony, or even really lifestyle isn’t one of them.
Read 9 tweets
Corner time is a mind buzz. Depending on what a Dominant wishes for their sub, they can transform any experience into a blissful descent into subspace, an erotic interlude, a learning moment, or a period of required reflection and contemplation of infractions and/or wrongdoing.
I believe corner time should be simple, yet erotic in its own way. Put them in their place. Figuratively and literally.

Then, simply step away. Just keep out of their earshot and let their mind do all the work.
Teaching moments and reinforcement of a protocol or rule are greatly enhanced with corner time. Hand spanking, strapping, and paddling are all excellent reinforcment implements of choice.
Read 6 tweets
I’ve come to the point where I feel hearing: “I have X amount of years experience” means nothing. Try saying, “I have been immersed/exposed for X years in *enter relevant kink”.
Don’t count on other people’s experiences that are unique to them and turn around believing you can “handle” someone else. You’re starting again. Listen, learn and explore with patience.
Allow me to say this, share your feelings and experiences you have had in the past but a lot of the time they are useless when you don’t listen to the one that’s enduring all the impact.

#spanking #discipline #kink #bdsm #fetish
Read 3 tweets
Self spanking: - it isn’t easy, not just because it is challenging to get a good swing at your own backside but because once it starts to hurt a bit, we all chicken out.

#spanking #discipline #kink #bdsm #fetish
Your hand won’t work. I’ve found that a paddle is difficult to control. Like, a paddle is best if it strikes both cheeks at the same time but getting the angle from the side requires flexibility that many don’t have.
I like a solid wooden spoon or a smaller paddle like a bath or hair brush with the right person.

My best results have been when I’ve found a spanking video that gets the results I want and I spank myself while watching it. Try to match spank for spank in timing and intensity.
Read 3 tweets
Do you have one spanking fetish that you have always wanted fulfilled? And if yes, is it easily fulfilled or too deep?

This question surprised me because of how simple and insightful it was. And because it was the first time I'd even been asked this question, even from myself.
Many of us have one or two big fantasies or desires that, for whatever reason, we cannot easily fulfil. Maybe it's about waiting for the right person or group of people. Maybe it's needing to develop some technical skill.
Maybe it's something that's frowned upon by their culture or family or religion or whatever. My hope for these people is that their fantasies get realised, because it must be torture to live with such an unrequited need.
Read 8 tweets
For some people, spanking is something you do 'in the bedroom'. It's a way of spicing up sex. And there's not a single thing wrong with that.

But for other people, spanking is a lifestyle. It's part of their identity.

(11 tweets long) 👇🏻 That jiggle...
A Spanko’s kink orientation is as important as gender or sexual orientation.

It's not difficult to recognise a lifestyle. You might be showing some signs yourself and not even know it. Here's an incomplete list:
Working hard to develop your kink - it takes effort. Like learning a language or playing an instrument, kink skills have to be developed with dedication and practice. Practicing caning. Learning how to lock people into position with your legs with no escape (unless you safeword).
Read 11 tweets
If you punish someone, make sure they know it:

Sometimes, when subspace hits the panic button, it can be because someone thinks they are being punished, whether or not they actually are. It can be the simplest thing. Maybe you didn't touch them the way you usually touch them.
Maybe you scolded differently, or not all. Maybe the joking and teasing just wasn't there.

Not all of us do punishment in our play, but many of us do. Sometimes punishment can take the form of not playing (especially for serious rule violations).
Or it can be a kind of mean play, or 'funishment'. Sometimes it can be for something they did, or failed to do. Other times it will be for something totally out of their control (punishing someone for the weather being bad on your walk home can be particularly satisfying).
Read 8 tweets
Praising Tops:

There are so many questions we ask bottoms that we should also ask Tops.

How do you give praise to your Top?

The pre-play interview is a basic part of the negotiation time. The Top asks questions like "What do you like to do?” and “What are your hard limits?”
They may ask about physical, psychological, and emotional issues that might affect your play or aftercare. Obviously it’s impossible to plan for everything, but the key is to be prepared. The more you know before you start, the safer everyone will be.
Too often though, that’s more or less where it stops. The bottom may feel like they have no need to ask any questions of their own. And there are lots of good questions to ask: “How long have you been playing?”, “What are you good at / not so good at / don’t like to do?”...
Read 13 tweets
Spanking as Stress Relief:

I love to give a stress-relief spanking when one is needed. To me, this means that there is neither role play nor a punishment-type of vibe. This is, in a sense, spanking as therapy.

#spanking #therapy #kink #bdsm #fetish
Positioning for the spanking must be comfortable for both parties; I prefer OTK, with me seated on a couch, so that the spankee's weight is supported, their arms are comfortable, and, if they wish, their head is resting on a pillow.
I like a pillow behind me, to support my lower back as well.

The spanking itself is a long and gradual progression, interspersed with a bit of reassuring shoulder rubbing. The idea is that the spanking begins as a slow, gradual take off, like a plane with a long runway.
Read 13 tweets
There were some intersting posts regarding switching in the past but nothing that spoke to me as a switch.

If you would like to do it, give that a go and don't allow anyone put you down if that’s the thrill you seek or a curious interest on the topic. Thrive to explore.
A number of people, including friends of mine plunged at the opportunity. Of those, many started as bottoms, for example, and ended up full time Tops.

Some still Switch. “Hi” 👋🏻😉
My belief is that it gives an advantage - you've been there, you know what it feels like, you understand the emotional aspects and the headspace.

Those who are eager, I hope you don’t wait too long. I'm awaiting word on the results when this happens just to celebrate with you.
Read 4 tweets
Another late arrival last night... 🌿🙈

Light hand spankings, hairbrush, paddle, thick leather crop and slipper was used to start...

And then all again so Mr @gmlfc974 vividly remembers how Moogle hates tardiness.

#spanking #paddle #kink #bdsm #femdom
I will clarify until I’m blue in the face that everyone experiences different sensations with a variety of implements. Anyone new entering my home, I go slow at first no matter what your past criteria is. I have to learn what your body can take because I know my hands alone bite.
Lovely hot steamy buns! 🍑
Read 3 tweets
Taking control or surrendering it are both roles that require a mutual understanding in advance of what the goals and limits are. I highly encourage you to just start by rubbing the bottom either bare or clothed. This helps to get the circulation going.
Rubbing, caressing, or massaging gives your partner a feel-good sensation and leaves them wanting more. It’s all about mixing pleasure with pain: pushing their limits and making them want more. While you’re doing this, you can also talk which will make them ease into the moment.
The key here is to take your time and not to rush it. If it’s romantic, you may even want to much more but make sure you’re both connected first.

That’s how you win us Spankos. ☺️

#spanking #discipline #kink #bdsm #fetish
Read 3 tweets
Many fit snuggly into a specific role: a Dominant (one who takes control) or a submissive (one who submits to the Dominant partner). However, I can’t primarily say which one I am, I realised that I am what's known in BDSM as a ‘switch.’

#spanking #switch #kink #bdsm #fetish
This just means that I am someone who enjoys switching roles, from Dominant to submissive, or bottom to Top. This is often done in the same setting with the same partner, or in different settings with different partners. Easy right?
Just like the standard Dom/sub dynamic, finding pleasure as a switch comes down to the consensual transfer of power. Power play depends on who you are with, and you can have a different dynamic with different people.
Read 6 tweets
I hate corner time after a spanking because I'm always in a cuddle mood with some people and it gets in the way of that, but I’m okay with corner time before the act, while the Top/Dom is preparing to do amazing things what to my bratty rear end. #brat
We live in a world of immediate gratification, and delaying the gratification (even dreaded hard punishment spankings that are oh so gratifying) builds anticipation, making it deliciously sweeter.
I'll often find myself humming the old Carly Simon tune, ‘Anticipation’ as the butterflies swarm in my tummy, noticing my hands caress the bare cool unblemished tingly-senitive butt that soon won't be any of those things except bare.
Read 4 tweets
A faux tautology: I need to be spanked (punished) because I need to be spanked (sexual spanking). It is the paradox that I think some of us struggle with but also really enjoy.

#spanking #discipline #kink #bdsm #fetish
In order for the spanking to be satisfying, it has to be real (hurts like a spanking should) but not actually real (for a reason that we should actually get one of those real spankings).
Example: I want to be spanked like I lost my family heirloom in a poker game but I don’t want to actually have to bet anything (or even play poker) in order to get that spanking.
Read 3 tweets
Not all spankings hurt like bees stinging a third degree burn. Hand spankings vary a lot, for instance. Loud slapping sounds can be accompanied but a sting but that feeling dissipates quickly, meaning that they hear is a big noise but it doesn’t feel that bad to you.
Set your own limits, as Top or bottom. I would suggest hand spanking and maybe a lightweight wooden spoon if you’re afraid of the pain. Paddles or anything that is heavy or made with hard wood will be breathtaking so be careful there. Also, straps, canes, or belts can be intense.
(Can’t seem to stop talking about spanking.)

#spanking #discipline #kink #bdsm #fetish
Read 3 tweets
I suspect that we have a spanking fetish or paraphilia: we find spanking to be a sexual turn-on. Actually, that is sort of an understatement. We have likely a whole head full of wiring that has us psychologically fed by the idea of spanking.

#spanking #fetish #kink #bdsm
The research on this is in its infancy but the current thinking is that these sorts of paraphilia (feet, boobs, spanking, whatever arouses a person) are created before one goes through puberty.
Passing through puberty, that becomes hardcoded in the brain and threaded in our sexuality.
Read 5 tweets
How long should a spanking last?

This question implies that you’re curious about spanking but have never actually been seriously spanked. That’s okay. Perhaps you’re thinking about getting someone to spank you and you want to go into the experience understanding what it’s like.
Totally understandable and fairly sane.

To answer your question, a proper spanking starts when the adult that wanted the spanking in the first place, wishes it was over.
In other words, the idea of a spanking for someone that ‘enjoys’ spanking is, I think, less about the actual act than about what happens before and after that part of the spanking when it really hurts.
Read 13 tweets
Is spanking part of BDSM?

The majority that I’ve spoken to say that spanking isn’t considered a BDSM ‘activity’ nor are they just interested in a single love tap. They want a real spanking with someone they really trust and have a connection with.
This very thing is theoretically illegal to represent in any art outside of writing. Because of this, we think that it doesn’t exist. Certainly if other people were into it, someone would have captured it on film, right?
We have essentially normalized a woman in stocks being thrashed by a bullwhip but a lady spanking a gentleman during intercourse is taboo. A man with an erection during a spanking is rarity in pornography.
Read 5 tweets
Over the knee or over the lap?

OTK: a favorite for sure. The contact with the spanker is electrifying even if through clothes. This position is immobilising, and good for taking a really hard hand, spoon, or hairbrush spanking. Love it over my sofa.
(It is challenging to wiggle my way to freedom and the challenge of limited movement while getting my bottom red and hot is awesome).

Some enjoy there toes and hands on the ground (pike position). I need more experience with that.
Over the lap: similar to OTK but if they’re sitting on a couch and I am mostly just laying on the couch over their lap. The bottom usually stays relaxed making my bottom jiggle, but I will always try and arch my bottom out as it feel extraordinary.

#OTK #spanking #bdsm #kink
Read 3 tweets
Punishments are at least a little embarrassing. Has someone made a bad decision that has consequences? A spanking is one possible method of CP which, if the bad decisions was somewhat childish or infantile, really fits.

(What do you think of this gif? Hahaha!)
Wrong or right, helpful or not, appropriate or inappropriate, allowed or prohibited, heathy or... yeah, that is the intention of spanking. It can be mortifying and painful in itself but also creates a response that is fairly embarrassing as well.
This is why spanking while angry or with cruel intention is incredibly harmful. You have to spank with love, while calm, and with a high degree of empathy. It is really hard to get right.

#spanking #discipline #kink #bdsm #lifestyle
Read 3 tweets

Related hashtags

Did Thread Reader help you today?

Support us! We are indie developers!


This site is made by just three indie developers on a laptop doing marketing, support and development! Read more about the story.

Become a Premium Member ($3.00/month or $30.00/year) and get exclusive features!

Become Premium

Too expensive? Make a small donation by buying us coffee ($5) or help with server cost ($10)

Donate via Paypal Become our Patreon

Thank you for your support!