Discover and read the best of Twitter Threads about #flotits

Most recents (22)

So #Arrestmas

What should be Trump punishment? All this:

To have extraordinarily long life with
-Sentence of life + 1,137 years (eligible for parole in 882)
-Cellmate Pence reading the Bible at him every damned day
-No internet
-Only 1 hr of TV daily: MSNBC tuned to Maddow
and
How should Trump End 2/
(in prison)

Prison means a healthier life

No cheeseburgers
No ketchup
No Diet Cokes
No McDonalds or KFC
No orange makeup
No tanning booth
No long hair (That Thing that nests on his head will be shaved off)
No Adderall
No Dexamethasone
No golf
The Trump end 3/
(in prison)

Prison means healthy food
Vegetables (I'd love to have them feed Goya beans to him every stinking day. The aroma in his prison cell would be epic)
Government provided free healthcare
No fake doctor notes
Regular check-ups
No phone calls to Hannity
Read 4 tweets
WIKIPEDIA:

King Donald the Worst
(as opposed to King Donald the Wurst, a foul bratwurst)

was the ruler of the United States of Republica, an imaginary nation that briefly existed in the delusions of Fox viewers (#FixFox) as well as some gullible voters...

#MagaKing Maga King
WIKIPEDIA

The short reign of King Donald the Worst featured a brief alliance with the Axis of Imagination: Thigh Land, Nambia, Somolia & 2 of the 3 Mexicos

King Donald introduced the method of Finnish Forest Raking & waged a prolonged war against windmills & sanity losing both
WIKIPEDIA

King Donald the Worst ascended to the throne upon his Reinstatement, after a failed coup d'etat, insurrection & picnic on Jan 6

His royal concubine was the Third Lady #FLOTITS, a Slovenian mostly of plastic. He had 2 sons: Don Jr & Hannity. He adopted a third son..
Read 6 tweets
A thought for us

MOST who comment & write about Trump do not know him. Most who tell us what Trump is or does have never MET him - like me. Never met the man

Trump is a liar and career con-artist. Most who worked with him, will not fully know him. He runs scams against them
Trump's Slovenian rental was a trophy wife he bought from a nude models catalog. She has SEEN him up close & heard him, so we can expect the Worst Lady / First Tramp / Third Lady / First HO / HOTUS / #FLOTITS has learned to know Trump, but he is a SERIALLY UNFAITHFUL con-artist
Obviously anyone still near Trump will spin stories to project the lies he wants to be believed, like that Trump would be a billionaire

There are TWO people who have KNOWN Trump long before he came to politics and are telling the truth about him
Read 8 tweets
What should be Trump punishment? All this:

To have extraordinarily long life with
-Sentence of life + 1,137 years (eligible for parole in 882)
-Cellmate Pence reading the Bible at him every damned day
-No internet
-Only 1 hr of TV daily: MSNBC tuned to Maddow
#TrumpIsGoingToJail
How should Trump End 2/
(in prison)

Prison means a healthier life

No cheeseburgers
No ketchup
No Diet Coke
No McDonalds
No orange makeup
No tanning booth
No long hair (That Thing that nests on his head will be shaved off)
No Adderall
No Cocaine
No Depends
No golf

#TraitorTrump
The Trump end 3/
(in prison)

Healthier lifestyle
Vegetables (I'd love to have them feed Goya beans to him every stinking day. The aroma in his prison cell would be epic)
Government-provided healthcare
No fake doctor notes
Regular check-ups
No phone calls to Hannity
#TrumpTreason
Read 4 tweets
What should be Trump's punishment? All this:

To have extraordinarily long life with
-Sentence of life + 1,097 years (eligible for parole in 876)
-Cellmate Pence reading the Bible at him every damned day
-No internet
-Only 1 hr of TV daily: MSNBC tuned to Maddow
#IndictTrumpNow
How should Trump End 2/
(in prison)

Prison means a healthier life

No cheeseburgers
No ketchup
No Diet Cokes
No McDonalds or KFC
No orange makeup
No tanning booth
No long hair (That Thing that nests on his head will be shaved off)
No Adderall
No Dexamethasone
No golf
The Trump end 3/
(in prison)

Prison means healthy food
Vegetables (I'd love to have them feed Goya beans to him every stinking day. The aroma in his prison cell would be epic)
Government provided free healthcare
No fake doctor notes
Regular check-ups
No phone calls to Hannity
Read 4 tweets
What should be Trump's punishment? All this:

To have extraordinarily long life with
-Sentence of life plus 1,092 years (eligible for parole in 874)
-Cellmate Pence reading the Bible at him every damned day
-No internet &
-No Twitter
-Only 1 hr of TV daily: MSNBC tuned to Maddow
How should Trump End 2/
(in prison)

Prison means

No cheeseburgers
No Diet Cokes
No orange makeup
No tanning booth
No long hair (That Thing that nests on his head will be shaved)
No Adderall
No Dexamethasone
He has a Covid vaccination, so no early release due to pandemic
No golf
The Trump end 3/
(in prison)

Prison means healthy food
Vegetables (I'd love to have them feed Goya beans to him every stinking day. The aroma in his prison cell would be epic)
Government provided free healthcare
No fake doctor notes
Regular check-ups
No phone calls to Hannity
Read 4 tweets
Flippathon Thread 1/

Las Vegas oddsmakers have issued fresh odds for all the potential flippers in the nation's biggest picnick, patriotism, insurrection, terrorism & hanging party hosted by the Republicans in Washington DC. Our beloved tradition: Grand Flippathon

#Flippathon Image
Flippathon Thread 2/

Perennial Magafavorite flipper is notorious serial butt-dialer & alleged attorney Rudy Giuliani, the Grand Duke of Four Seasons Total Landscaping (parking lot). Rudy Colludy has confessed his crimes on live video, so he is utterly screwed. He has to flip Image
Flippathon Thread 3/

As America's Maynaise turned America's Vampire is former Federal prosecutor who sent Mafia killers to life in prison, he is in mortal danger inside any federal housing. He will spend his prison time in solitary confinement. He had begged Trump for a pardon Image
Read 53 tweets
WIKIPEDIA

King Donald the Worst (as distinct from King Donald the Wurst) was the ruler of the United States of Republica, an imgainary nation that briefly existed in delusion of Fox viewers (#FixFox) and some gullible voters...
WIKIPEDIA

The short reign of King Donald the Worst featured a brief alliance with the Axis of Imagination: Thigh Land, Nambia, Somolia & 2 of the 3 Mexicos. King Donald introduced the method of Finnish Forest Raking & waged a prolonged war against Windmills & sanity losing both
WIKIPEDIA

King Donald the Worst ascended to the throne upon his Reinstatement, after a failed coup d'etat, insurrection & picnic on Jan 6. His royal concubine was the Third Lady #FLOTITS, a Slovenian mostly of plastic. He had 2 sons: Don Jr & Hannity. He adopted a third son..
Read 6 tweets
How To End Trump 1/

All this

To have extraordinarily long life with
-Sentence of life plus 1,052 years (eligible for parole in 813)
-Cellmate Pence reading the Bible at him every damned day
-No internet &
-No Twitter
-Only 1 hr of TV daily: MSNBC tuned to Maddow

#LockHimUp
The Trump End 2/
(in prison)

Prison means

No cheeseburgers
No Diet Cokes
No orange makeup
No tanning booth
No long hair (That Thing that nests on his head will be shaved)
No Adderall
No Dexamethasone
He has a Covid vaccination, so no early release for pandemic reasons
No golf
The Trump end 3/
(in prison)

Prison means healthy food
Vegetables (I'd love to have them feed Goya beans to him every stinking day. The aroma in his prison cell would be epic)
Government provided free healthcare
No fake doctor notes
Regular check-ups
No phone calls to Hannity
Read 4 tweets
The Ideal End to Trump 1/

All this

To have extraordinarily long life with
-Sentence of life plus 1,000 years (eligible for parole in 800)
-Cellmate Pence reading the Bible at him every damned day
-No internet & of course
-No Twitter
-Only 1 hr of TV daily: MSNBC tuned to Maddow
Ideal Trump End 2/
(in prison)

Prison means

No cheeseburgers
No Diet Cokes
No orange makeup
No tanning booth
No long hair (That Thing that nests on his head will be shaved)
No Adderall
No Dexamethasone
He has a Covid vaccination, so no early release for pandemic reasons
No golf
Ideal Trump end 3/
(in prison)

Prison means healthy food
Vegetables (I'd love to have them feed Goya beans to him every stinking day. The aroma in his prison cell would be epic)
Government provided free healthcare
No fake doctor notes
Regular check-ups
No phone calls to Hannity
Read 4 tweets
Let's talk about Pardons

We DON'T want Trump to pardon ANYONE in the current administration or Senate, House, other GOP or NRA or Fox etc. The more Trump pardons the more messy will be the investigations & trials & punishment to follow

BUT Trump WILL PARDON HIMSELF & his kids
This thread is not about 'what we want' Trump to do. It's about what Trump MIGHT actually do. Don't waste your breath responding that you want no pardons or you want the pardons revoked or whatnot

Trump is President, regardless of his Impeachments, he CAN PARDON whoever he wants
Trump can ONLY pardon for FEDERAL CRIMES. Even in those cases, the pardoned WILL BE LIABLE for CIVIL lawsuits.

And Presidential pardons do not absolve legal responsibility from STATE crimes. For example, most who participated in DC riots committed both FEDERAL and STATE crimes
Read 22 tweets
PARDON ROULETTE

CHRISTIE: Donald, if you pardon your kids, they'll be forced to testify against you. And they will. You've trained them to be selfish. You know them. They'll bury you. You cannot be this stupid. It'd be the dumbest thing you could do

#PardonRoulette #PardonGate
PARDON ROULETTE

IVANKA: Daddy, don't pardon anyone who is not family. Not Manafort, not Giuliani and gosh, not that vile creep Stephen Miller. The more you pardon, the more there will be investigations. Keep pardons just within the family, Daddy.

#PardonRoulette #PardonGate
PARDON ROULETTE

DON JR: Sir, Ivanka testified in DC against you & Eric testified in NY. You can't trust them. Eric isn't even our blood. That freak was fathered by Gary Busey. Just pardon me

TRUMP: Should I pardon your scary wife, the Gargoyle?

#PardonRoulette #PardonGate
Read 38 tweets
The Trump End? 1/4

To have extraordinarily long life with
-Sentence of life plus 1,000 years (eligible for parole in 800)
-Cellmate Pence reading the Bible at him every damned day
-No internet & of course
-No Twitter
-Only 1 hr of TV daily: MSNBC tuned to Maddow

#ConvictTrump
Trump End 2/4
(in prison)

Prison means
No cheeseburgers
No Diet Cokes
No orange makeup
No tanning booth
No long hair (That Thing that nests on his head will be gone)
No Adderall
No Dexamethasone
He has a Covid vaccination, so no early release for pandemic reasons
No golf
Trump end 3/4
(in prison)

Prison means healthy food
Vegetables (I'd love to have them feed Goya beans to him every stinking day. The aroma in his prison cell would be epic)
Government provided free healthcare
No fake doctor notes
Regular check-ups
No telephone calls to Hannity
Read 4 tweets
The Trump End? 1/4

To have extraordinarily long life with
-Sentence of life plus 1,000 years (eligible for parole in 800)
-Cellmate Pence reading the Bible at him every damned day
-No internet & of course
-No Twitter
-Only 1 hr of TV daily: MSNBC tuned to Maddow
#ImpeachmentDay
Trump End 2/4
(in prison)

Prison means no cheeseburgers
No Diet Cokes
No orange makeup
No tanning booth
No long hair (That Thing that nests on his head will be gone)
He has a Covid vaccination, so no early release for pandemic reasons
No Adderall
No Dexamethasone
No golf
Trump end 3/4
(in prison)

Prison means healthy food
Vegetables (I'd love to have them feed Goya beans to him every stinking day. The aroma in his prison cell would be epic)
Government provided free healthcare
Regular check-ups
No fake doctor notes
No telephone calls to Hannity
Read 4 tweets
Post-Trump Career Thread 1/

BTW all GOP politicians who were on national stage in 2016, have developed a 'strategy' to survive the Trumpomess. They KNEW he will burn this down. They've all thought they had the perfect way to have a career beyond Trump. Here are a few examples:
Post-Trump Career Thread 2/

Some were Trump friends before his 2015 run for President started, and have remained with him until now. Like notorious serial pants-grabber & alleged attorney Rudy Giuliani.

When I say 'old friends', I mean these are criminals who need pardons
Post-Trump Career Thread 3/

Some opportunists jumped onboard early in 2016, but were smart enough to see Trump is setting up a kleptocracy, and JUMPED OFF before the inaugration to avoid all legal stench. Like failed Bond Villain, the Chrischristie
Read 25 tweets
PARDON ROULETTE

CHRISTIE: Donald, if you pardon your kids, they'll be forced to testify against you. And they will. You've trained them to be selfish. You know them. They'll bury you. You cannot be this stupid. It'd be the dumbest thing you could do

#PardonRoulette #PardonGate
PARDON ROULETTE

BARR: What idiot suggested these 20 pardons today? Anyone who was involved with you will now be forced to testify against you! Was it Hannity? Don't tell me you're listening to Giuliani again? Hasn't he gotten you into enough trouble?

#PardonRoulette #PardonGate
PARDON ROULETTE

IVANKA: Daddy, don't pardon anyone who is not family. Not Manafort, not Giuliani and gosh, not that vile creep Stephen Miller. The more you pardon, the more there will be investigations. Keep pardons just within the family, Daddy.

#PardonRoulette #PardonGate
Read 38 tweets
PARDON ROULETTE

CHRISTIE: Donald, if you pardon your kids, they will be forced to testify against you. And they will. You've trained them to be selfish. You know them. They would bury you. You cannot be this stupid. It would be the dumbest thing you could do.

#PardonRoulette
PARDON ROULETTE

BARR: What idiot suggested you should pardon your kids? Was it Hannity? Don't tell me you're listening to Giuliani again? Hasn't he gotten you into enough trouble?

#PardonRoulette
PARDON ROULETTE

IVANKA: Daddy, don't pardon anyone who is not family. Not Manafort, not Giuliani and gosh, not that vile creep Stephen Miller. The more you pardon, the more there will be investigations. Keep pardons just within the family, Daddy.

#PardonRoulette
Read 36 tweets
I drafted an end to Trump #AndImNotEvenSorry

Extraordinarily long life with
-Sentence of life plus 1,000 years (eligible for parole in 800)
-Cellmate Pence reading the Bible at him every damned day
-No internet & of course
-No Twitter
-Only 1 hr of TV daily: MSNBC with Maddow
Trump end 2/4
(in prison)

Prison means no cheeseburgers or Diet Cokes
No orange makeup
No tanning
No long hair (That Thing that nests on his head will be gone)
As we'll have a Covid vaccination. there's no early release for pandemic reasons
No Adderall
No Dexamethasone
No golf
Trump end 3/4
(in prison)

Prison means healthy food
Vegetables (I'd love to have them feed Goya beans to him every stinking day. The aroma in his prison cell would be epic)
Government provided free healthcare
Regular check-ups
No fake doctor notes
No telephone calls to Hannity
Read 4 tweets
Trump end? 1/4

All this: have extraordinarily long life with
-Sentence of life plus 1,000 years (eligible for parole in 800)
-Cellmate Pence reading the Bible at him every damned day
-No internet & of course
-No Twitter
-Only 1 hr of TV daily: MSNBC tuned to Maddow
#Pennsylvania Image
Trump end 2/4
(in prison)

Prison means no cheeseburgers or Diet Cokes
No orange makeup
No tanning
No long hair (That Thing that nests on his head will be gone)
By 2021 we'll have a Covid vaccination. so no early release for pandemic reasons
No Adderall
No Dexamethasone
No golf Image
Trump end 3/4
(in prison)

Prison means healthy food
Vegetables (I'd love to have them feed Goya beans to him every stinking day. The aroma in his prison cell would be epic)
Government provided free healthcare
Regular check-ups
No fake doctor notes
No telephone calls to Hannity Image
Read 4 tweets
How should Trump end? 1/4

All this: have an extraordinarily long life with
-Sentence of life plus 1,000 years (eligible for parole in 800)
-Cellmate Pence reading the Bible at him every damned day
-No internet & of course
-No Twitter
-Only 1 hr of TV daily: MSNBC tuned to Maddow
Trump end 2/4
(in prison)

Prison means no cheeseburgers or Diet Cokes
No Adderall
No Dexamethasone
No orange makeup
No tanning
No long hair (That Thing that nests on his head will be gone)
By 2021 we'll have a Covid vaccination. so no early release for pandemic reasons
No golf
Trump end 3/4
(in prison)

Prison means healthy food
Vegetables (I'd love to have them feed Goya beans to him every damned day. The aroma in his prison cell would be epic)
Government provided free healthcare
Regular check-ups
No fake doctor notes
No telephone
Read 4 tweets
Consider Trump Paranoia?

His longest-serving political advisor Stephen Miller: Covid
His longest-serving business associate Hope Hicks: Covid
His longest-serving legal advisor Giuliani: so sick, likely Covid
His longest-serving fake wife #Flotits: Covid

#ScreamHere #WayTooEarly Image
Trump Paranoia 2/5

Trump longest-serving accountant: Allen Weisselberg: Flipped
Trump longest-serving lawyer: Michael Cohen: Flipped
Trump longest-serving friend: David Pecker: Flipped
Trump longest-serving sex playboy buddy: Epstein: epsteined in prison

#TrumpIsNotAmerica Image
Trump Paranoia 3/5

Trump most trusted child, Ivanka: Covid (in reality is plotting her get-away behind locked door)
Trump Idiot Son number 1: Don Jr: Called dad crazy
Trump Idiot son number 2: Eric* Testified in NY for 8 hours Monday

*obviously Gary Busey's son
#TrumpIsNotWell Image
Read 5 tweets
West Wing Writer End To Trump

This is a fan-fiction collaborative story about how Trump ends, done on Twitter on 16 Sept, 48 days before election day. We have accepted a few common premises. Trump is as corrupt as our worst fears. Moscow Mitch McTurtle & GOP have taken Putin
West Wing Trump 2/

..and GOP have taken Putin millions via the NRA. Trump has sold cabinet posts & judge seats including Kavanaugh's SCOTUS seat. Our story starts on election night, and Trump election loss has already been called on all networks. This West Wing Episode ends..
West Wing Trump 3/

This West Wing episode ending credits start to roll on that day when Trump is handcuffed heading to federal prison. This is OUR story of the ULTIMATE way for Trump saga to end, bringing West Wing justice to many of our favorite characters. Lets start
Read 72 tweets

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