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Why do monosexual people (in my experience particularly cis het men) ask pan/queer/bi people which gender they prefer? Men keep asking me this on dating sites. I truly don’t understand what they are trying to uncover with this question.
If I say men, does that make them feel more secure? If I say women, does that make them feel like they have to work harder or do they feel special to be a man dating a woman who prefers women? And what if I said I prefer non-binary folks? Would they even get it?
I think this question baffles me too bc I’ve had more sex w/ men, but more sustained intimate relationships w/ women & prefer the company of women & non-binary ppl socially. So are folks asking about a sexual, social, or romantic gender preference? Do they know the difference?
