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The Monday #BoebertReportCard.

Only 12 tweets from Chucklehead this weekend, and (spoiler) none of them were about Colorado.

She was annoyed that she was accurately portrayed as a dimwit on Saturday Night Live.

She had a lot to say about CNN.

She gushed over FL’s gov.
And of course, there was her famous tweet with “enlies.”

Ostensibly, it showed her concern for missing children, but beyond the bastardization of words, it had entirely misleading numbers.

If Chucklehead were actually interested in helping, she’d
start with understanding the numbers. The FBI provides a lot of data on this at fbi.gov/file-repositor…
Read 6 tweets
A long #BoebertReportCard today. There have been a lot of votes in the House.

The Durango Herald had an editorial that mentioned how Boebert has been busy metaphorically extending her middle finger rather than representing her constituents, and that middle finger had a rigorous ImageImage
workout over the last couple of days.

She gave a middle finger to Indigenous Peoples by votinng no on the Indian Buffalo Management Act. Also on the Agua Calinete Land Exchange Fee to Trust Confirmation Act. And another middle finger on the To amend title VI of the Social
Security Act to extend the coverage of Coronavirus Relief Fund payments to Tribal Governments.

She gave a big middle finger to those dealing with opioid addictions by voting no on the Synthetic Opiod Danger Awareness Act. She was one of only 14 to vote against it. Oh, and
Read 9 tweets
I’ll be brief in today’s #BoebertReportCard.

Lauren had a busy tweeting weekend! 33 tweets. Few were memorable. Mostly empty platitudes and anger about Joe Biden. Seems she’s all done with Afghanistan and is back to immigration as her go to topic.
She got back from Texas; oh how she loves it there. I did a long thread on her new Texas bestie from the January 6 attack on the Capitol. Jenny Cudd. I think they’d make good cellmates. If you missed it, you can find that here:
She spoke in Texas at something called the Patriot Academy, founded by Rick Green. Located in Dripping Springs (that’s not satire) It promises to indoctrinate,
Read 7 tweets
A special edition of the #BoebertReportCard! Time to take a look at @RepBoebert’s legislative effectiveness. These are the bills she’s introduced since taking office in January. Now in fairness, the House of Representatives currently has a Democratic majority, so [thread]
she’d have to do something like reach across the aisle to get anything passed, and we all know she’d rather shout across the aisle, but even more telling is how few of her fellow Republicans she can round up as cosponsors. [Narrator’s voice: not many].
To put this into perspective, the House currently has 432 members with 3 vacancies; 220 Democrats and 212 Republicans. In order to get a simple majority, a bill or resolution needs 217 votes (until at least two of the vacancies are filled, then it moves up to 218).
Read 38 tweets
Welcome to the first part of the #LaurenBoebertLies summary.

Lauren’s favorite video of herself is with a life-size cardboard cutout of Kamala Harris. It must be, because she’s had it pinned on her @RepBoebert page since June 8. The joke is, much of her own life is a
cardboard invention.

She lies about her parentage. She said her mom was “divorced” while they were in Florida, but there’s no record of her mom being married or divorced in Florida.

But her lineage IS kinda interesting. Her mother tried suing Stan Lee the wrestler for child
support. The story gets weirder when the paternity tests came back negative, and weirder still when it turns out the woman who did the paternity test had a history of faking them. And there are court records in this reporting that include her birth certificate, which leads
Read 17 tweets
It’s Monday and time for the #BoebertReportCard.

What a busy weekend Lauren had! There was performative patriotism. There was a family emergency that cancelled one event, but luckily it was magically resolved in time for another campaign event the
same day, and still she had time to tune into #tfg’s rally in a pasture in Alabama and quote a vulgar line.

A little grifting, warning of how Democrats are destroying this fine country. Outrage that the import of Russian ammunition is going to be blocked in September. And of
course, the obligatory anti-immigrant tweet.

Later today, I’ll be posting the first part of the #LaurenBoebertLies summary. Happy Monday, y’all, especially those who aren’t
Read 4 tweets
Today’s #BoebertReportCard is a long one, so pour yourself a cup of coffee. Lauren didn’t have a good day yesterday. (Thread)

It started off with her campaign receiving a letter from the Federal Elections Commission. They noticed the Venmo payments from her campaign. They
noticed her numbers didn’t add up on contributions and expenditures (the individual amounts added up to a different number than she showed on her summary page). They noticed multiple donations over the legal amount.

You can see the letter here: docquery.fec.gov/pdf/670/202108…
Then her overdue Financial Disclosure hit the House Clerk’s website. She signed it only Tuesday, though it was due Friday.

And just like that, we learned that her husband is making upwards of $400K a year, working for a company she identified as Terra Energy Productions, but
Read 15 tweets
Okay, now for the regular #BoebertReportCard

Lauren noticed she’s supposed to represent Colorado, and tweeted that she’s going to visit the I-70 closure. Whew. I’m sure she’ll bring her toy shovel and bucket to help, doncha think?
Also she had time to comment on Cuomo’s resignation twice. And a couple of tweets about COVID (Obama had a birthday party with vaccinated guests! Why can’t *I* have a birthday party?) (Because you don’t like the vaccine, and because your real birthday is December 19th, not 15th,
and we still don’t know why you lie about it)

Her postponed personal finance disclosure, required by law, is due this week. Can’t wait to see that, if she really posts it.
Read 5 tweets
Monday #BoebertReportCard!

In the first eight days of August, Lauren has sent 51 tweets, at an average salary of $74.78 per tweet.

This weekend’s highlights: 4 tweets on I-70, 3 on immigration, 3 on COVID. She says she’s working with the Democratic Representatives and
Senators to get I-70 open again. You know, those same legislators she usually insults.

God made a brief appearance in a tweet of her holding a goat, and she did her 61st grifting tweet of the year. The goat looked uncomfortable as Lauren puckered up to kiss. I was
uncomfortable, too. I mean, who knows where those lips have been?

She also appeared on a podcast by Dinesh D'Souza. You might remember him as the man who pled guilty to an election law felony, or as the man who dated dated Laura Ingraham and Ann Coulter before he married a
Read 5 tweets
Is it time for the Friday edition of the #BoebertReportCard? Yes, it is!

16 tweets from her campaign account, 2 from her official account! What productivity!

By my calculations, the average cost per tweet so far this month is $37.83. What value for the money! (Thread)
It appears that the “happy warrior” did not have a happy day. Her tone was angry again today, even though “Life is too short to always be angry.”
We see that Cuba has moved up in the leader board, #5 following Word Salad, Democrats, COVID, and Biden. Just a few short days ago, she didn’t even know where Cuba was! What a scholar!
Read 5 tweets
So here’s your #BoebertReportCard for Thursday July 15. I need a day away from her bile, so you get it early. Lauren tweeted only eight times. About Denver. About Cuba. About guns. About those pesky Democrats. But nothing about her district or anything in it.
Oh, and anger. I’ve been subjecting myself to the horror of her tweets for months, and this is the most egregious and unabashedly ironic one I’ve seen. The angriest member of the House said, “Life’s too short to always be angry. Let’s be happy warriors for Jesus and happy
warriors for Freedom.” Wow.

Well, we hope she has a chance to work on her anger management issues as she jets off to Florida again. Still waiting on FEC filings so we can see how many of her 2nd quarter excursions were paid for by her voluntary donors and how many by Uncle Sam.
Read 4 tweets
Pretty quiet on today’s #BoebertReportCard. She only tweeted 7 times yesterday, and four of those were about Cuba. Nothing about Colorado. It’s like she’s not even trying. ImageImage
Maybe she’s practicing her speech for this weekend at TPUSA in Tampa. For those having a hard time keeping up, that’ll be her fifth trip to Florida this year.
I learned that the TP in TPUSA does not stand for Toilet Paper. But it could. Oh, and she made her fourth grift tweet in as many days. Those Florida trips ain’t gonna pay for themselves, folks. ImageImage
Read 4 tweets

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