Discover and read the best of Twitter Threads about #weekendhumor

Most recents (3)

I Received the below message from a #Friend and found it #TooGoodNotToShare ..

What is A.A.A.D.D.?

It is Age Activated Attention Deficit Disorder.

#ThankGod they now have a name for it ..

Read on more to learn about #AgeActivatedAttentionDeficitDisorder ..
This is how it manifests:

I decide to #water my #garden
As I turn on the hose in the driveway,
I look over at my #car and decide it needs washing

As I start toward the garage,
I notice mail on the porch table that
I brought up from the mail box earlier
I decide to go through the mail before I wash the car

I lay my car keys on the #table, put the junk mail in the #garbage can under the table and notice that the can is full

So, I decide to put the bills back on the table and take out the garbage first
Read 12 tweets
#WeekendHumor
#SarcasticFacts ..
#TooGoodNotToShare message received from a friend ..
#HappyWeekend

✅The past tense of fit is fat

✅An infinite number of $1 bills and $20 bills are worth the same

✅If your parachute doesn’t deploy, you have the rest of the life to fix it
✅Average human lifespan is 70 years equating to 2.2 billion seconds. There are 7.5 billion people on Earth. So technically every person is not even worth a second of your time. Some calculations👆

✅The sentence “Don’t objectify women” has women as the object of the sentence
✅ You cannot make History if you use Incognito Mode

✅We pay taxes on money we earn to pay taxes on money we spend

✅No matter how good you are, you can always be replaced.

✅Pizza is the real-time pie chart of how much pizza is left
Read 9 tweets
A friend sent me some #TooGoodNotToShare #WeekendHumor
#HappySunday
I cant stop laughing 😂
Just love these #kids
Spontaneous and witty

😂Teacher:How old is your father?
Kid:He is 6 years.
Teacher:What?How is this possible?
Kid:He became father only when I was born.
#Logic!
#Children Are Quick and Always Speak Their Minds

😂TEACHER:Joseph,go to the map and find North America
JOSEPH:Here it is.
TEACHER:Correct. Now class,who discovered America?
CLASS:Joseph
😂TEACHER:Wale,Y are you doing your math multiplication on the floor?
WALE:You told me to do it without using the tables

😂TEACHER:Adigun, how do you spell CROCODILE?
ADIGUN:KRO-KO-DIAL
TEACHER:That’s wrong
ADIGUN:Maybe its wrong,but you asked me how I spell it
Love this child
Read 7 tweets

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