Thread by @MaNishtana

The setting: Passover aisle at ShopRite
The players: blonde jewish lady, her adorable 6 yr old daughter, me
Scene:
Daughter: [picks up random item] Is this kosher?
Mother: If it's in this aisle, its kosher and kosher for Passover.
1/x

Le helpful me: Theres actually a couple of things in this aisle that arent k for p
Mother: [snippily] Everything in this aisle is k for p
Me: Well there's some soups over there that aren't
Mother: [snippily] Well everything on the paper covered shelves are
2/x

Me: The soups are also on the paper covered shelves
Mother: [huffs off] Sure
3/x

[Ten minutes later]
Mother and daughter wander back into aisle as I'm on the phone with my wife asking if she's up for making matzo balls. Mother overhears convo, notices my tzitzit, sees the whole ass box of shmura matzah under my arm (which has been there the ENTIRE time)
4/x

Mother blanches. My convo ends.
Me: [to mother, maybe a tad facetiously] Chag sameach
Mother: [shakily] Chag sameach

#pesachshoppingwhileblack #lol #sigh 5/5

Edit: To be fair, the soups were kitniyot. I'm guessing ShopRite was just making the assumption that a lot of folk make that kitniyot are just wholesale k for p and you don't need to check or have a k for p hechsher for.

For some reason I apparently need to clarify that the kitniyot soups I'm referring to were kitniyot in the sense that they were rice/legume, as opposed to the actually k for p kitniyot products ALSO present in said aisle