Thread by @patio11

Oooooh one of my favorite topics.

A quick thread. If your counterparty is X then Y is the shibboleth that most quickly gets you past the initial script stage.

Anyone in sales: “I used to do sales.”, which is probably not a lie to a salesperson given the expansive set of jobs which require a little bit of selling and cultural tolerance for a bit of truth stretching during the dance.

A bank: a) Do it only on paper. b) Address to any of Office of the President, Chief Compliance Pfficer, General Counsel, or Investor Relations.

A bank, but I don’t want to go to war I just want to skip the line: Get whatever their cheapest premium product is, call the phone number for *that*, and ask for an internal transfer to any group you need.

Any bureaucracy: Present as if you are collecting a paper trail. Prominent indicia of this include notebooks, organized files, and repeatedly asking for specific names, dates, and citations for authority “for my notes.”

An internal recruiter: Find the hiring manager, make sure you have a relationship with them, too. Use the recruiter for scheduling and logistic support.

Any large company mailroom: Certified mail, return receipt requested.

Healthcare: I’m unwilling to lie (including specifically about having practiced a regulated profession) but suffice it to say I dial Dangerous Professional up to 11 and if people come to the impression that I practice but in another specialty well they’re welcome to their guesses

(This is partly about demeanor, above all not looking confused about the process, and partly judicious use of shibboleths. I’m occasionally surprised how few are required; it isn’t a state secret that “500mg of acetaminophen” and “a Tylenol” are the same thing.)