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Aug 18, 2020, 10 tweets

HOW TO APPEAR SMART IN MEETINGS

(Pro tips that you can’t get anywhere in the world)

[Retweet for others to see]

A hilarious thread.

1. Ask questions like ‘Is this Scalable?”

Start by saying ‘hmm’ so that you sound like you know what you are saying. Then go ahead to say something like:
‘Hmm, Chidozie, I see that you put in the work, but is this Scalable?’

2. Draw a totally unrelated Venn Diagram, and say rubbish but be confident. Something like:

“This is where we are, this is where we want to be, and right at the center is the distance between the remote control and my next meal”

3. Encourage everyone to take a step back.

This has always worked, it will always work, now and forever.

4. Translate metrics into percentages.

People hate maths. So, they assume that you’re smart when you start talking fractions and percentages. If someone says 25%, you can say that
“Do you mean one-fourth?”

5. Ask to see the data.

We don’t really know how this works but try it, and make sure to wear a mean face when you do.

6. Always say ‘That’s a great Question’ before avoiding each question.
If you aren’t going to answer their question, you should at least rub their ego.

7. Remind everyone that we have limited resources.

Say something like: “I mean this idea is fantastic and we have everything we need to execute it, but do we have the resources to pull it off?”

8. Say something like: “Are we asking the right questions?”

Remember to make a straight face and rub two fingers against your chin.

Works like magic.

The end.

Which one will you start using?😁😁😁

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#work #careerbuddy

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