THREAD: Too often people, organisations and society in general believe #mentalhealth to be merely mean suicide. Or suicidal feelings. It doesn't. Trust me on this.
That is not to say those feelings do not materialise, because they do, as 21/12/18 will always remind me of...
...but it is so much more than that. In fact, I would suggest suicide is the headline, but so much more attention needs to be focused on other aspects of #mentalhealth.
Let me explain.
#mentalhealth drains you. It tires you out. It makes you question your self-worth...
...the simple things become impossible, scary, an obstacle. Not because you don't want to do them. You do. But you can't. And if anyone asks why, you have no reason. You cannot explain. That makes you feel worse. Upset. Useless. Been there, done that, boy have I got the T-shirt..
...
...the problem is that then affects your life. Your partner begins to think you don't like them. Your work sees your productivity decline but your mistakes increase. They may offer some support, but I promise not all the team will always understand. And I get that 100%...
...because the issue is you cannot see it. Asked why you made a clanger, you struggle to answer. But it happens. Your head is a mess, you just want to sleep. To be better. To be valued again. To be loved. Appreciated. Wanted. So you batten down the hatches...
...but do you want to kill yourself? Unlikely. What you want is to be better. 'Normal'. 'Acceptable'. To be what you were before this **st*rd of an illness got its hands on you. You look for help, often it's not there. Even from those who claim to be friends, your family etc...
...so the weekend arrives. Yay. Time off work. But you are tired. Not because you have done much, but because you are knackered from an illness. "Let's do something," ask partners, friends, family. They are lucky if they get a grunt. That pisses them off...
...and you KNOW it pisses them off. But, for reasons you cannot explain, you cannot do anything about it. Which upsets you more. So you hide away. More. Remember heading out? Thing of the past. But that DOES NOT mean you want to end it all...
...we know that #mentalhealth is the biggest killer of men aged 18-45, but I would argue, and have for @RailSafetyWeek that rather than focus on suicide, it needs a stronger focus on getting people active. Because that will lift a mood. Friends, family and fresh air help...
...trust me on that. I FIRMLY believe that if we can get to people much earlier, and stop the seeming fixation with #mentalhealth meaning suicide then we can tackle the problem.
...so we need to help people get out and about. Like I did today. I am lucky - I'm in recovery. My circumstances have changed recently which I think have helped. You don't often see things like that. Because it is hard to do. One piece of advice I would give is to identify...
...when you became ill and what caused it. Then try and remember what cheers you, and try and do that. Love a mag? Read it. Love football? Watch it. Love crisps? Eat them. Give yourself time. It helps. And for **** sake make sure you keep friends...
...because, like today, when you are able to do something, if they are TRUE friends, they will be there. Understand. Not judge. So today has been about looking for different things on the Ely-Pboro line. With a mate who has been there for me. Who I respect massively as a result..
...who didn't judge. Who keeps with the stupid, childish jokes, who understands if I am not quite me it's not me being a c**t, it's because I'm not recovered. #mentalhealth can do that. At no point in any of these locations did I think about suicide. I got up early this morning..
...looking forward to challenging myself as I'm not a great snapper, but like a Norwich player in the Prem, I try. But more than that, I was looking forward to being outside. On a Saturday. Without football being involved. And that is what #mentalhealth does...
...so, please, take time. If you suffer from #mentalhealth, chat. I can't answer it all; I'm not an expert, don't profess to be. I just suffered, badly. But it was people on Twitter like @traceyb78, @heather_waugh, @MarkMiddleton37, @StevePotter116 who helped me! #itsoknottobeok
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